Chuck Vs Distance
by MissMonk
Summary: Sarah & Casey are temp assigned to take out a Fulcrum cell leaving Chuck in the care of two other agents. Will the time away and distance shake Chuck & Sarah's rocky new relationship? Are the two agents watching the most important asset in the world to be trusted? Will Casey be able to blow something up?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: So I've had this ready for a few days but I was having some 2nd thoughts about the plot but then I thought "Meh" whatever. I'll write what I want.

Thanks to charahkids for betaing this thing.

Chapter 1.

This was not a good idea. This was in fact a very bad idea. A very very bad idea. On a scale of 1-10 on the scale of bad ideas, Sarah felt that this was at least a 50.

Sarah stared at the screen in front of her, shoulders slumped slightly back and arms hanging loosely down her side as her lips moved in silence trying to voice to the General how bad a plan this was, but nothing would come out. Her mind was blank. The only thing that would circle around her brain was: 'this will not end well."

Glancing over at Casey briefly she could tell by his widened eyes and tight jaw that he was thinking along the same lines as her, which was a comfort at least. At least she wasn't alone in this.

"General, I'm not one to question orders, but-"

"And don't start now Major Casey. This is what needs to be done." The General stated firmly. Sarah gave a grim expression before glancing quickly at Casey again. It was obvious the General had already made up her mind on this and wasn't going to change it any time soon.

"What about our covers General? I'm sure if anything Bartowski's overbearing sister will notice Walkers missing." He argued. Sarah felt herself mentally face palm her forehead.

She didn't even think about the covers, all she could think about was Chuck and how he would take it. It was yet another reason to be grateful for having Casey as her partner. He at least thought of the things she's been increasingly forgetting. Thought she will deny it to her grave that her new relationship with Chuck had anything to do with it.

"That's been considered as well Major. You are being recalled to active duty so that will excuse you from your, well, other job. Agent Walker will be back on the east coast taking care of her ailing father." She paused to gage their reactions before continuing. " You two will be working with Agent Larkin to bring down the Fulcrum cell as quickly as possible and then return to Burbank to continue your assignment of protecting the asset." General Beckman informed them.

"What about Chuck ma'am. He can't be left alone, without protection with Fulcrum getting closer to us." Sarah blurted, finally getting her voice to work. She cringed slightly at how panicked it sounded, but kept her impassive expression still on while praying to whatever ditey that was listening to not have Beckman mention the word 'bunker'.

"I am well aware of that Agent Walker and that has been taken into consideration as well. Two Agents will temporarily be assigned to watch Chuck." Two photos of the Agents who will be taking their place appeared on the screen below Beckman's.

One was of a woman about 28 with dark brown eyes and straight hair down to her shoulders that had blonde highlights. She was somewhat short but looked very capable of taking down a guy Casey's size or larger. The other photo was of a handsome male around 33 years of age with short sandy blonde hair grey eyes and a slim but muscular build.

Sarah internally blanched as she saw the brunette who would be taking her place, while a small amused grunt came in Casey's direction, apparently thinking the same thing as Sarah. But she blinked a few times and turned her eyes away from the pretty brunette with the dark brown eyes, exactly Chuck's typical type. She wouldn't be jealous, she had no reason to.

"This is Agent Mira Coleman and Agent Andrew Leyan. They will be taking over protection duty for the asset for the foreseeable future. They will be staying at Major Casey's apartment posing as his brother and sister-in-law who are house sitting and looking for their own place in the area while Major Casey is recalled."

Casey let out an annoyed growl at the prospect of having other people invading his personal space. Sarah agreed with him, silently making a note to offer assistance in store all his favorite guns away so the new agents can't play with them.

"How much will they be cleared to know?" Sarah inquired. "Will they be going on missions?" Beckman eyed her for a moment, before letting out a slight sigh, obviously disliking her answer.

"They will not be cleared to know he is the Intersect and therefore will not be going on missions. With Fulcrum becoming a bigger problem it's been decided that we cannot risk that information being spread to anyone else. Therefore they will just be aware that he is a high level CIA asset in need of protection. He will also not be going on missions until such a time as you two return from this assignment. Since they will not know about his special skill there will be no reason for him to go out." She gave them a hard piercing look as her mouth went thin conveying her next point. "That said, I suggest the two of you get this assignment finished as quickly as possible. As much as I hate to admit it, this team even with the Intersects unorthodox methods is one of this nation's most successful teams, and we would like it to stay that way."

"Yes General." The both of them said solemnly, both secretly pleased at her veiled compliment.

"With that said we of course want to utilize the Intersects ability still and we also want to keep tabs on the watchers, therefore you two will still have access to the asset via secure conference in Castle as well as daily calls from Agent Walker for updates on the situation in Burbank as well as keeping with the cover." She stared at them a few moments longer, seemingly wanting to say something but decided if she wanted to or not. Whatever it was, she held both Sarah and Casey's interest. "I want you to keep up with him, make sure everything stays…problem free." She said

Both Casey and Sarah looked at each other momentarily in confusion before turning back to their boss who obviously looked slightly uncomfortable at their scrutiny. However to her credit she stared right back at them dead on, a raised eyebrow waiting for their inquires.

"Are we expecting trouble?" Casey asked her. The General relaxed a bit and sat back in her chair a bit with an annoyed little huff.

"I'm not expecting it but with Bartowski anything is possible." She said. Sitting up straight she leaned over her large desk obviously trying to convey something important to them. "As much as we don't like it Bartowski is the single most important intelligence asset in this country, possibly the world. I don't like leaving him with just anyone.

"However this cell is one of the biggest we've found and taking it down has to be our first priority so unfortunately I have to use you two. I expect you to appreciate the situation and to get done quickly."

"So you don't trust these two agents with the Intersect?" Casey clarified crossing his arms over his chest. Beckman just stared at him quirking her eyebrow at his statement.

"I don't trust anybody Major Casey. Especially with two unknowns and especially with an unpredictable asset. Just keep an eye on things best you can from your assignment. Keep in touch with the asset."

With that she finally closed off the screen leaving the two of them staring at it in silence. Sarah wasn't sure what to say, focusing mainly on her breathing at the moment.

Temporarily reassigned.

She didn't like it but at least it was only temporary, she hoped. She understood the importance of the assignment, taking down this cell would bring them one step closer to defeating Fulcrum. They've become a menace for too long and it was time for it to end it. However she wasn't without her reservations. For the first time in her life, Sarah Walker, CIA Agent, was not excited to go on a mission.

Her life had seemed recently to all come into place, giving her things she never really thought or ever hoped for and now she was reluctant to allow any of it to slip away from her. She was of course thinking about Chuck.

After everything they've been through over the past year and half Sarah finally gave in, and just in time too. Just after the Jill debacle and Christmas being a disaster with Fulcrum taking the Buy More hostage and Chuck witnessing Sarah kill someone in cold blood, Sarah had thought long and hard about their situation. She understood what Chuck was going through, she wasn't heartless. She knew that he had fallen for her, was in love with her but she couldn't bring herself to really confront it so she kept pushing him away.

But after a lot of talking and understanding after the Tyler Martin mission Sarah couldn't do it anymore. She couldn't keep pushing Chuck away. She wanted him and everything he offered her so she gave in and they had spent a wonderful night together, and a wonderful morning once she was able to quail his fears that she was going to regret it and it was all going to end before it even began.

A slight smile crossed her lips as she thought about that morning. How he had held her tight and kissed her hard after she was finally able to convince him that she didn't regret what they did and she was honest with how she felt about him. That she wanted to start something with him and not just push him away.

"I'd wipe that smirk off your face Walker or someone's gonna know something they shouldn't." Casey's voice broke through her thoughts bringing her back to the present, back to the problem they were currently facing.

"This is not a good idea." Sarah finally voiced out loud. "This is not going to go well." With that she slumped into the chair she had stood behind for the past hour while they were being briefed on their new mission. She leaned her elbows on the table and placed her head in her hands.

Casey grabbed the folder that was sitting on the table and flipped it open looking over the specs of it. Sarah ignored him for a few moments, letting her mind wander yet again to Chuck, always on Chuck. She wasn't sure how she was going to tell him or what exactly. It's only been a few months and she didn't know how long they were going to be gone.

"You're going to tell him about the assignment right?" Casey prodded across from her. Sarah let out a breath and nodded her head still buried in her hands. "Good. As much fun as it would be to see his reaction I really don't want to listen to his whining when you tell him it's with Larkin." He snickered, turning away from the table as Sarah dropped her head upon it.

She lifted her head slightly to glare at his retreating form as he went into the armory to begin pack and most likely start locking stuff up. Giving in to a groan she stood up from her slouched position and walked over to the nearest console to begin the security lockdown on everything in Castle to a certain clearance.

She wasn't looking forward to talking to Chuck about this. Not at all. They had a nice quiet evening planned, just the two of them. She knew she had the briefing with Beckman but then they were going to order a pizza and stay in her hotel room and watch some TV. Or "TV" with the quotation marks in her head.

Closing down the computer she was on she stood and stretched her body out. She was stalling, she knew that but she didn't really care at the moment. She had a horrible task to do and she was going to take her time.

Turning around she headed to the back where Casey was and watched him from the door as he began locking up all the weapons they weren't taking with them. She peaked inside the bag that was sitting on the table in front of her and rolled her eyes slightly at the amount of machinery they were taking. Chances are they wouldn't even use a quarter of what he was taking with them.

"Leaving anything for the other kids to play with?" She teased him with a crooked smile. Casey gave a grunt as he lifted the bag up and moved it to another table.

"No. Beckman said full lock up. They aren't going to be doing anything and last thing we need is Bartowski getting into something he doesn't need to be getting into." He grumbled. Sarah nodded her understanding and continued to stand there watching him. "Lock up the computer systems?"

"Yeah, they're down to GS4 clearance but Chuck will be able to access anything if we need him to. Everything's secure for our departure." She stated. They stood there for a few moments in awkward silence as Casey arranged weaponry under Sarah's glazed stare. Casey gave an annoyed growl grabbing her attention.

"Shouldn't you be doing something Walker? Like telling the asset of our departure?" He hinted at annoyed. Sarah pretended to ignore him before letting out her own annoyed huff.

"He's not going to take it well at all Casey. This isn't going to end well. This whole assignment is just…" She couldn't finish her sentence but Casey seemed to understand.

"He'll be fine Walker. He's tougher than he looks." He said, strangely encouraging. Sarah nodded her head in agreement and stood up straight to head out. "But it wouldn't hurt if you reassured him a little. You take care of the moron, I'll take care of the rest of the packing." He stated.

Sarah got the hint, giving him one last nod before heading up the stairs and through the freezer of the Orange Orange. She got his message loud and clear. Casey frequently turned a blind eye to Sarah and Chuck's relationship status, as long as it didn't interfere with the work or the safety of the Intersect. At that moment she was glad of it, that while he complained and ignored it that he at least seemed a little supportive of what was going on with them.

Exiting out of the building Sarah glanced around the area, a habit of being a spy, seeing nothing out of place she walked quickly to the side where her beloved car was. She slid into the driver's seat and just sat there for a moment or two trying to catch her wits.

She had a lot to do tonight. They were leaving by eleven the next morning and she still had to pack but she knew that tonight would be busy trying to explain to Chuck why she had to go on this mission and reassuring him that she was coming back and wasn't running away with Bryce.

"Oh! God damn it Bryce." She cursed silently to herself as she started up the car. She ran over the scenarios in her head on how to tell Chuck, what to tell him. He would be over at her place in an hour for their date night and she wanted to have what she wanted to say ready.

She supposed it probably would have been slightly easier if it wasn't Bryce Larkin she was going on the mission with. Granted Casey would be there them the whole time and Sarah would be sure to inform Bryce of their status as only partners the moment she saw him, but Chuck wouldn't focus on that.

All he would hear is that his cover girlfriend who was his real secret girlfriend was running off on some exciting new mission with her ex-lover and his ex-best friend who got him kicked out of school and slept with his girlfriend (she didn't believe Jill). He'll be hurt, but he'll accept it. He'll be understanding about the situation, placing complete and utter trust in her and suggest they spend the rest of the date as planned.

However she was well aware that on the inside he would be insecure, lonely, and depressed thinking and fearing the worst. That while he trusted her and doesn't believe she would purposely betray him he would compare himself to Bryce Larkin and automatically lose. The same old story he'd been through all through college and over the past six years since then.

But he would be wrong. He was nothing like Bryce Larkin. Not even close. He was better.

But that's not how Sarah really wanted it to go if she were honest with herself. She wanted him to be angry about the situation and at her. Angry that she would have to leave him. They've only been truly together for a couple a months and their relationship was still rocky and new. She didn't want him to just accept this fate and move on. To stay in Burbank with his two new handlers and mope depressed for the whole time she was gone. She wanted him to want to fight for them, though it would be futile as she would still have to go on the mission.

Her foot hit the break of her car hard as a thought ran across her mind. No matter what she said, Chuck would become depressed while she was away and she didn't want that. She couldn't stop it entirely but she could do something to raise his spirits, to help assure him that she was coming back, to Burbank, to him, to them.

Turning the wheel of her car to make a U-turn she headed back to the Buy More as quickly as she could with a huge smile. She knew what she could do, what she would do. Pulling into the parking lot she swung quickly into the nearest empty spot before jumping out of the car and walking quickly into the store. The soft hiss of the doors opening and the cool blast of air from the AC greeted her as she hurriedly looked around the store for the person she wanted to talk to; Morgan.

She spotted him at the Nerd Herd counter talking to Jeff and Lester and for a moment Sarah thought about coming back later or calling him. It was never pleasant having to deal with anything involving those two. Giving a slight shudder of disgust however she walked forward with a purpose in her step and approached Morgan.

"Hey honey, Chucksters not here right now, but maybe I could help you." Lester offered creepily as she approached the counter. He leaned over it with his tongue hanging out and drool leaking down his chin. Sarah cringed and turned to Morgan choosing to ignore him and not comment.

"Hey can I talk to you?" She asked him politely. Morgan nodded his head and walked away from the Nerd Herd desk, Sarah not missing the middle finger he gave the other two behind his back.

She rolled her eyes at the immaturity of the associates at the Buy More and yet again wondered how the hell Chuck had lasted so long in this environment. He was so different from everyone here, and she wasn't just talking about in looks and intelligence. He just had a nature about him that was hard working and strived to be the best he could. He was stuck in this dead end job and he wasn't happy there but he lacked the confidence to move on.

She gave a sly grin to herself. It was something she would have to work on when she came back. Giving him more confidence. She had seen it in him over and over again over the past year and half so she knew that he had it in him. Everyone did. He just didn't see it himself.

Morgan guided Sarah into the home theater room and closed the door and curtain, cringing internally that the creepy employees in the store probably thought they were in there together cheating on Chuck. Though she knew Morgan would never do that to Chuck, and she would never do that with Morgan, it still would lead to a lot of speculation and comments that Chuck will undoubtedly hear for the next few weeks.

"What up Sarah." Morgan said gaining her attention. She stared down at the small man and decided to sit down so they were more on even footing. She perched on the edge of the coffee table while Morgan plopped down comfortably on the couch like it was his own, which wasn't surprising considering the amount of time he spent in there.

"Morgan, I need to talk to you about Chuck." She started. Morgan immediately sat up straight on the couch and held out his hands.

"Whoa there Sarah." He said. "Before we discuss my favorite topic, Chuck, I need to lay some ground rules." He told her.

Sarah let out an annoyed huff again and crossed her legs leaning forward giving him her full attention. She would hear him out; she didn't really have much of a choice if she wanted him to do her a favor.

"First off, whatever you ask me be aware that I will not break any confidences, and there are many if I may be so bold to declare, that my buddy has shared with me in regards to anything pertaining to you or anything else." He started.

Sarah readily agreed, although if he only knew how much she actually knew of said confidences courtesy of the many bugs placed all around Chuck at all times, some of which even Chuck didn't know about, but she decided obviously that he didn't need to know that.

"Second, whatever you have to say unless it's a surprise for my dear friend I will be forced to inform him due to full disclosure of our friendship agreement we came up with in 2nd grade." He gave a sympathetic expression as he patted her gently on the knee. "You know how it is Sarah, Bros before hoes."

Once again Sarah raised her eyebrow at his statement and tiled her head to the side expectantly. She knew he didn't mean that she was a hoe, but still, she did get some pleasure out of making him squirm and stutter slightly once he realized his mistake. After a few beats she let out a light laugh and then grabbed his arm that he was waving frantically in front of her.

"Morgan, Morgan, its fine. I understand. I assure you I'm not here to break any of Chuck's confidences or gain any secrets from you." Not that she couldn't or needed any from Morgan. "I would never want to do anything that would cause any trouble between the two of you. You've been such a great friend to him."

Morgan relaxed slightly and sat back on the couch looking at her curiously, and slightly worried. It was then that she knew that her idea was a good one. That Morgan would be willing to keep her apprised of Chuck.

"Alright, what do you need?" He asked her hesitantly. Sarah sighed pretending to think and looking like it was a struggle for her to come out to get him to help her.

"I have to go out of town for a while. I'm leaving in the morning." She started; feeling slightly startled by Morgan's alarmed face.

"Oh no. How's Chuck taking it? Badly? Isn't he? Oh he's going to go into a rut again." Morgan began muttering. He went to stand up but Sarah forcefully pushed him back down.

"He doesn't know yet, I'm telling him tonight." She said.

"Where are you going?" Morgan inquired sitting on the edge of the couch and running his hand through his hair. Sarah thought about her cover, hating it already but needing to make is solid.

"I have to go back to DC for a bit. My father is very ill and I have to go take care of him." She lied perfectly.

"Oh, well, just tell Chuck that Sarah. He'll understand that you have to do that." Morgan told her. Sarah already knew that.

"I know but, you know Chuck. I don't know how long I'll be gone, and of course I'll call him every day but, you know how he'll get." She said. "We're just; some things are a bit rocky right now because of the whole Jill thing."

As predicted Morgan's eyes popped wide almost coming out of the sockets at that as he stuttered and tried to deny anything. She knew she shouldn't have mentioned it to him, but she hoped that it would convince Morgan that she was on the level in regards to Chuck. She raised her hand to placate him again.

"It's ok Morgan. He told me about it so you don't worry. I understand."

"You understand that he went out with his ex-girlfriend from college while he was still going out with you?" Morgan asked bewildered for a moment before immediately slapping his hands across his mouth. Sarah had to stop herself from rolling her eyes.

"Yeah. He told me. And while I understand Morgan, and I forgave him he still feels really guilty about it, and we've been kind of rocky since then." She admitted, frowning and looking away. Morgan nodded his head understandingly.

"Totally. Of course he would be honest with you. That's our Chuck and trust me, if anything this whole situation with Jill just reaffirmed how much he cares about you ya know. Besides. It was just a date or two, it's not like he slept with her or anything." He laughed nervously for a moment; stopping abruptly at Sarah's narrowed eyes and thinned lips.

"Yes, I'm well aware of their activities during that time." Sarah said thinly but moved on. "That being said, I'm concerned that with being away he might start doubting us, and I don't want that."

"I agree. What can I do to help?" He offered eagerly. Sarah took a deep breath, deciding if she really wanted to do this or not. That she could be stuck talking to Morgan more than she ever could want.

"While I'm away, I want you to give me a report on Chuck. And honest report." She said. Morgan looked confused.

"Sarah, I already said I wouldn't break-"

"No I don't mean anything like that." She paused gathering her thoughts. "It's just, he will keep saying he's fine and nothing is wrong. And I know it's not true. I just want you to tell me the truth how he is."

"Oh."

"I know, it's probably not great that I'm doing this but-"

"He would never admit when something's bothering him." Morgan finished for her, eyes scrunched up in thought. She waited a few beats for him to reply before talking again.

"Exactly. I just want him to be ok. I don't want to go, but I have to. I don't have a choice." She said morosely.

"I understand Sarah. And believe me, you being here, risking Chuck's trust to go behind his back to his best friend to seek help really gives you bonus points in my book. "He thought an extra moment. "I'll do it. I believe in you and Chuck. You've made him so happy and a bit stressed but mostly happy. You can count on me!"

"Thank you Morgan. And please, anything you can do to help him not focus so much on my absence. I don't' want him to be all you know…"

"Depressed, down, mournful, sad and just playing pathetic while he pines away his days waiting eagerly for your daily calls and for your eventual return?" Morgan nodded "Yeah, typical Chuck. He doesn't handle bad situations well. But that's why he has me Sarah. Don't worry, Chuck will be fine. I'll keep an eye out on him."

Sarah couldn't stop the huge smile that appeared on her face after that. She already presumed that Morgan would help her with this, knowing how he could never turn down anything that could hurt his best friend. She couldn't help but feel slightly jealous of Morgan loyalty to Chuck, never really having a friend like that.

She paused in her thoughts at that, smiling a moment later.

Until now.

Chuck had tried to show her over and over since they met how much she meant to him, and even though she kept pushing him away he always attempted to at least show that he was in the very least her friend. Something she kept rejecting as well. Agents didn't have friends, not really. But Chuck was one of the most loyal people she knew, and regardless if you accepted it or not, he was loyal to you and would always be your friend no matter what. Always be there for you. It was engrained into his very being and just another part that Sarah had fallen for.

She made arrangements with Morgan, exchanging phone numbers with him, something she prayed she would not regret in the near future and left the home theater room, elbowing her way out of the room as the other employees crowded the exit. Rolling her eyes once more she finally exited the store and headed towards her car. She only had half an hour until Chuck would be over at her place with the pizza and she had to prepare and begin packing.

She wasn't sure what she was going to say, but she just prayed that whatever it was that Chuck wouldn't freak out.

~TBC~

A/N: Say what you will about Morgan, but I really adore him. 2nd chapter is almost done. This story will be so much easier to write me thinks. Feel free to follow me on facebook or twitter! I could always use more friends to support my witty remarks.

Peace out!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thanks!

**knightrid3r**: I'm glad someone agrees with me about Morgan. I really feel he was essential to the show and I enjoyed watching him grow throughout the five years. I adore him and wish I had a friend like that. I'm usually the Morgan in my friendships. And thanks for the advice, I changed it.

**wilf21**: I'd say there will be more drama than angst here. At least that's what I'm aiming for. That and romance. *shudder*

** Nerdtastic78**: Thank you for the encouragement. I had a moment during writing ch2 where I was going to scrap it due to self doubt. But I'm going to stick with it and see where it takes me.

And of course thank you to charahkids for betaing mystory and talking me into writing it some more.

Chapter 2.

Sarah made it back to her hotel room fifteen minutes before Chuck was scheduled to arrive. She was glad to have the few minutes of peace before he came and had spent the time flitting around her room packing what she would need to take with her. It wasn't much since an Agent would never truly know until they get there what would really be needed on the mission but there were staples that every agent took with them and Sarah Walker was no exception.

She tended to travel lightly most of the time, always being provided with whatever she needed at least clothes wise when she got to where she was going. But even Sarah Walker had some personal items she would bring of her own. Some of her more comfortable clothes for the rare times that she wasn't actually on a mission and could just relax, her toiletries, some that were imported because she loved them so much, a battered copy of Alice in Wonderland that she had gotten as a child and read over and over again. It was the same stuff she'd packed in her small carry-on bag since she was first recruited into the CIA at 17 years of age, except for one thing.

Sarah near the head of the bed finished packing everything except for one thing. Reaching her arm out to the framed photo that sat on her nightstand she stared at it for a few moments. It was a photo of her and Chuck that Ellie had taken on a trip up the coast for a weekend. It was one of the few times that it was just Chuck and Sarah with out any additional surveillance. Beckman was not happy but had allowed it as it was needed for the cover.

Her mind drifted back to that day the photo was taken, almost a year ago when Ellie had insisted that they all go for a walk at the local outdoor market that was near their hotel room. Sarah didn't really want to go, didn't want Chuck to go. They had spent the whole night staying up and just talking, something she'd never done before in her life with another person on any real level.

It had been easy to do with Chuck. They were stuck in that hotel room alone together for the night, playing the part of a happy couple on a weekend sabbatical. It was uncomfortable at first especially since it was after they had gotten a little too involved during a cover kiss and Sarah had to once again push him away, but Chuck made it better. Not by pretending it didn't happen but just by moving forward. Something he must have learned long ago.

'When something sets you back just keep moving on.' A lesson he probably learned over the years by the frequent setbacks life would toss in his direction.

It had been wonderful but she had been exhausted by the next day. They had finally fallen asleep somewhere around 4am with a 7am Ellie wake up call. But she couldn't let Chuck go on his own and he seemed to really want to go to the market so she followed.

It was a pleasant little market she'd admit. The outdoor salesmen shouting their wares reminded her a lot about some of her missions in the Middle East and she loved it. Exploring the mysterious of the little booths with the smell of different foods and fresh fruit and flowers all around surrounding them.

But the photo was taken on the pier overlooking the beach and the ocean beyond. The sun was bright and warm overhead but the soft breeze from the ocean kept them cool and felt good on her skin. Not as good as it felt to have Chuck wrap his arms around her and lay his head on her shoulder to look at the camera.

Sarah stared at the photo, smiling to herself now at the goofy grin that was forever frozen on Chuck's face, the way his soft brown eyes focused on his sister with the camera but all she could remember about it was how safe she felt to have his arms around her. How his long fingers tickled her bare skin where her shirt and slightly lifted. Her face was turned to him with her forehead touching his temple. She always tried to avoid looking at her expression afraid of what it could mean; it was one of awe and happiness. She could tell at that moment all her walls had come down as she placed her hands on his laying on her stomach. It was a blissful moment.

Letting out some of the air she had held in her lungs she stared at the photo for a moment longer before turning the frame around and removing the tabs that held the photo in place and taking it out. She held it in her hand a moment longer before standing up and slipping it in the top flap of her suitcase. She knew she probably shouldn't take it with her, any spy could tell you that taking anything that personal could potentially be catastrophic, but she couldn't bring herself to leave it behind. It was her favorite photo of them and she couldn't bear to not be able to see it every night when going to bed. She needed it with her.

Sarah stiffened slightly as she heard the ding of the elevator down the hall and footsteps coming towards her door. She knew it was Chuck she could tell his footsteps anywhere from having spent so much time memorizing everything having to do with him. It was an occupational hazard. She waited by the bed for him to knock, knowing how it freaked him out when she just opens the door, and she wanted him to be as calm as possible for the news.

A moment later the three knocks that were typical of Chuck sounded reverberating around the room. She put a smile on her face despite the tightness in her stomach at what she was about to do. Stepping up to the door she twisted the knob and opened it up, her smile going brighter at seeing Chuck stand there in front of her with a grin of his own.

He looked absolutely delightful with his hair free and curly making her wants to run her hands right through them and let her fingers get lost in the strands. His lanky form was covered in a maroon long sleeve shirt with a brown tee underneath and dark form fitting jeans, with of course his trade mark Converse shoes completing the ensemble. In short, he looked alluring and she knew she'd have a hard time keeping her hands off him.

After she greeted him of course.

With that thought in mind she bunched the front of his shirt in her hand and pulled him into her room shutting the door behind her as she spun him and placed her lips on his kissing him hard and fast. She could tell by the way he hesitated for a second that he was alarmed but quickly got into it as he wrapped his hands around her lower back and pulling her flush to his body. Sarah brought one hand up around his neck tugging hard on the hair at the nape before curling her fingers in his silky curls and moaning happily into his mouth at the feel.

She loved this, kissing Chuck. She always had since the first kiss they ever shared, though it was a cover, to the last kiss earlier in the day when she left him at the Nerd Herd desk to attend her briefing. She'd be the first to admit that there was a lot that Chuck was not capable of doing but kissing would not be on that list. It would be at the top of things he did very well and she would enthusiastically take a demonstration whenever she can.

Feeling his fingers drift under the hem of her shirt and move up her back touching her skin, making it feel like it was burning she reluctantly began disentangling herself from him, placing kisses along the way as she pulled away. Chuck groaned loudly as she did and tried to keep her close but Sarah took control and grabbed his hands from her back and brought them in front of her.

"I know Chuck." She whispered pecking his lips a few more times. "But we need to talk." That immediately got him to stop and he dropped his hands to his side alarmed as she let them go. Sarah ran a hand through her own hair, moving it out of her face as she let the seconds spread between them so she could get her breath back. Her chest rose and fell as her heart tried to find its normal rate. She didn't know how he did it but somehow Chuck always got her going. And he didn't even say nor do anything except show up at her door and return her kiss.

Finally she felt she was ready to do this, to tell him and she braced herself slightly and put on her agent persona, indicating that he should sit on the bed. He looked alarmed, his senses obviously picking up that something was wrong. He would have made a great spy if it weren't for Bryce. She didn't agree with him that Chuck wouldn't have survived. He has been doing just fine so far. What he lacked in experience and finesse he certainly made up with in intellect and observation.

She stood in front of Chuck as he sat on the edge of her bed and folded her hands together as she attempted to explain the situation. She was just glad that Chuck was so patient as she attempted to get the words out. It was hard, harder than she thought it would be especially when he had such a sad alarmed expression.

"Chuck, Casey and I, We…You see there's…uh." For the first time ever Sarah's training had failed her. This should be easy. But the worried expression on Chuck's face made her stumble with her words and she wished that she didn't have to do it. But Chuck noticing her hesitation and the few words she did get out obviously picked up on something as his face fell from worried to saddened and he nodded his head morosely.

"You guys are leaving aren't you?" He said quietly. Sarah immediately rushed over to him and kneeled on the floor in front of him grabbing his hands, her heart throbbing wildly at his saddened expression.

"It's only for a little while Chuck. It's temporary." She said quickly, desperate for him to understand. He nodded his head again.

"Am I allowed to ask where you're going?" He asked her. She bit her bottom lip for a second meeting his eyes debating what to say. She decided on the full truth.

"We're being assigned on a mission to take down a Fulcrum cell in Maryland. I'm not sure how long we will be gone but we've been ordered to wrap it up quickly. We won't be gone long." She assures him. Chuck nodded his understanding.

"What about me? What are they going to do with me while you two are away? Am I going with you?" He asked hopefully. Sarah gripped his hands tighter.

"No Chuck. Beckman thinks it would be too dangerous for you to be there. This is one of the largest Fulcrum cells we've seen and she wants to have it taken down quickly." She explained. "Beckman has assigned two other agents to watch over you for the duration of our mission."

She watched him a few moments gaging his reaction. He seemed to be taking it better than she thought he would which was a plus. Though she hadn't gotten to the truly bad news yet. It was foreign for her to be so concerned about someone else' feelings. Normally she would just say what was needed and get it over with but she felt she needed to coddle Chuck, though she was sure he would disagree.

Chuck had faced many bad situations and had bad news given to him frequently over his short life. The fact that he was still here and relatively well, so to speak except for the Buy More, was a testament to how strong he really was.

"Is that wise?" He asked her.

"They won't know about the Intersect. Beckman doesn't want that knowledge out to anyone else. They'll just be bodyguards basically." She told him. "The good news is to maintain our cover we'll get to talk every day. Beckman wants us to keep tabs on you so I'll be just a phone call away."

Chuck smiled down at her and brought his hand up to gently brush the side of her face with his fingers. She closed her eyes at the touch as the hairs on her body raised at the sensation. It was a simple gesture but she understood it. She reached her own hand up to cover the back of his and turned his palm towards her lips and placed a kiss on it, finally opening her eyes to look up into his soft brown ones.

Just one more piece of news.

"There's one more thing Chuck." She said her voice soft and breathless as she watched his expression. His brows narrowed as he waited for what she had to say, and once again she felt like she needed to just tell it as if she were ripping off a Band-Aid. "The mission is with Bryce."

She watched as Chucks shoulders slumped forward slightly and then smashed his face into his hands. She waited withheld her breath while he worked out whatever it was he was working out in his mind, but it didn't take long. He lowered his hands onto his lap and looked down at her still kneeling in front of him. He gave her and exasperated sigh.

"Ok." He said simply. That's it?

"Ok?" She asked hesitantly and he nodded gently grabbing her forearms and pulling her up to sit on the bed with him, grateful he did as her knees were beginning to hurt. She turned her body so she could fully face him and he did the same as he grabbed her hands in his.

"Yeah, ok." He told her. She narrowed her eyes at him in confusion and he raised her hands to his own lips and placed a kiss on her knuckles.

"I don't understand Chuck." She confessed and he just smiled at her again, that dazzling half smile that he always did that made her heart speed up.

"I know. It's Bryce Larkin. That guy just can't stay down and away." He griped gently and looked out the window for a moment. "I'll be honest, I don't like it. I never like it when Bryce is around. It always feels like he's there to put me in my place. To remind me of how ordinary I am."

"But you're not Chuck." She said desperately squeezing his fingers gaining his gaze again. "You are anything but ordinary. You are extraordinary, and I'm not talking about that computer in your head."

Sarah scooted closer to him on the bed, almost sitting on top of him but he didn't seem to mind. Chuck let go of her hands and wrapped his arms around her leaning forward to rest his forehead on hers gently. She closed her eyes as she felt his breath blow gently across her face.

"I know you're not Sarah. But, as much as I don't like it, you going with Casey on a mission with Bryce Larkin without me, I'm ok with it. Because you are Sarah Walker, super spy extraordinaire. You will do great on this mission and come back to me as soon as you can." She opened her eyes to find him staring at her with his crooked smile. She pulled back from him to see more of his face, to drink in his features so she would have it with her on this mission without him.

"And Bryce?" She staggered out, voice crackly. Chuck's smile immediately fell and he looked down at their hands, somehow finding each other again, always wanting to be touching and holding each other. She felt her heart ache at his expression as he thought about Bryce, and thought about her. But then he looked up at her, a firm look in his eyes and he gripped her hands tightly.

"I don't know Sarah. Bryce is used to getting what he wants. He always had. It's something I've always been, well, jealous of." He paused and swallowed the admission of jealously obviously hard for Chuck. "He's taken so much from me over the years, all in the name of being my friend, in protecting me. But all he's done is constantly hurt me. You two, you have a history, and I don't trust him. Not even a little bit."

"Oh Chuck." She sighed out raising her hand to the side of his face, cupping it while running her thumb up and down. She didn't want to go on this mission. But Chuck lifted his hand and placed it on top of hers, lowering her hand from his face.

"It's ok Sarah. It's something I've never really worked out, gotten over. But one thing is for sure Sarah." Scooting even closer still he wrapped his lanky arms around her bringing her against his body again. She wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face into his chest, breathing in the deep scent that is distinctly Chuck.

"What is for sure Chuck?" She asked him. He placed a kiss against her temple, leaving his lips on her for a moment longer than normal before moving down to her ear.

"I trust you Sarah. As a spy and a girlfriend. Whatever happens with Bryce, I believe you would not do anything to hurt us, or me." His voice hitched and she could feel his chest rise and fall as his heart beat faster. "I love you."

Sarah's heart stopped at that declaration and her mind went blank. She couldn't move from her spot curled up against him as the words reverberated in her ears over and over again. She waited for panic to set in and for her agent side to kick into gear telling her she needs to run.

But nothing came.

She knew he loved her; it was plainly obvious since she met him that he liked her a lot, and later obviously loved her. But he never admitted it, never said it out loud so Sarah pretended it didn't exist even though she already knew. But now hearing the words, something in her felt full and she felt like she would burst.

Not sure what to do, or what to say she tried to sit up a bit, to look him in the eyes and pray that some words would come out. Something to tell him equally how she felt without saying the words she knew she wasn't ready to say, but Chuck held her tight against him and she slowly melted into his embrace. She wanted to express to him, to tell him she loved him too but she couldn't do it, and she was breathless at Chuck's silent understanding of that.

They stayed like that for an indeterminate amount of time until a loud knock at the door startled the both of them. Sarah jumped slightly and reached for the knife hidden in her boot she was wearing but Chuck relaxed a second later and pulled away slowly.

"It's probably just the pizza guy. I ordered it on my way here." He told her placing one last kiss on her temple before going to the door. He smartly looked through the peep hole in the door before opening it and paying the kid who was holding out a pizza box.

Her stomach rumbled at that point, reminding her that she hadn't eaten in a while and she stood to follow Chuck and grab the box from him as he chatted for a moment with the kid about some video game or other.

Setting the pizza down on the table by the window flipped open the box and smiled at seeing a veggie pizza with no olives. Chuck was the first one ever to figure out her distaste for olives and though she didn't mind pepperoni or meat on her pizzas she preferred an all veggie. Not even her father who she had shared many pizzas with over the years they were together while she was growing up had figured it out. Or, worst, she thought, if he did, he just didn't care about what she liked or didn't.

"Hey what's with the frown?" Chuck said sneaking up behind her and plopping in one of the chairs at the table. She gave a small sad smile as she followed suit.

"Nothing, just thinking about pizza toppings." She replied reaching in for a slice. She nibbled at the piece ignoring Chuck's look of concern from across from her.

"I didn't know pizza toppings were something to frown at unless they put something icky on it, like olives." He made a show of inspecting the pizza closely. "I don't see any." A light laugh escaped from her while she whipped her hands on the napkins Chuck had set down.

"No, I was just thinking about out of all the pizza's I've had in the world with people, you were the first one to not order olives, purely because I hate them." Taking a bite of his own pizza Chuck nodded his understanding, swallowing his piece before speaking.

"Well Sarah what can I say. Not everyone can be as awesome as I am." He sat back crossing his in front of him while Sarah just laughed.

It felt great, just laughing at something stupid and random. She hardly ever did it before but she found it so easy to do with Chuck. There was just something about him that put people at ease, makes them lower their inhibitions and walls and just relax around him. It was a talent that she suggested on more than one occasion that they needed to figure out how to bottle it up and used it in the CIA. Though she wasn't sure how they would do that as she would refuse to allow the CIA any more contact than necessary to Chuck.

In the short amount of time they had known each other Chuck had somehow broken down almost all the walls Sarah had built around her mind and heart throughout the years as a con man's daughter and training in the CIA. It scared her far more than she would ever admit, but at the same time she felt kind of relieved. For the first time in her life she felt she could connect to another person, and she genuinely believed that Chuck would never betray her. She never really had to think about motive when around him for the things he does for her. She believes him when he claims to do it just for her, to make her happy.

"Hey you." Chuck said, breaking her out of her thoughts. She blinked a few times her mind coming back into focus and seeing Chuck kneeling in front of her, his large hands on hers that sat in her lap. The same position she had been in not too long ago. She looked down at him for a moment, just staring, memorizing every feature of his face. The smooth skin of his forehead, the stubble on his chin, the soft crinkles along his nose and eyes indicating he smiled a lot.

He was beautiful. He always said that he was an ordinary guy, a plain nerd who would never get anyone like her. She knew she was beautiful; it's not arrogance knowing it's just the truth. She had lots of training once she joined the CIA to make sure she was, to enhance it. She never told anyone but sometimes she felt like a fraud in her beauty. That it was all superficial and none of it was real.

But Chuck had a natural beauty about him. He was naturally good looking. And what made her notice it more was the fact that he didn't seem to know it at all. He ignored it completely and didn't know how much people enjoyed looking at him. How he could technically have any girl he wanted if he just had the confidence to get out and go get them.

But that wasn't important to Chuck. And she knew that her beauty wasn't that important to him either, that he viewed it as a topping on a piece of cake. And she knew it to be true since Chuck is the first person since joining the CIA to ever see her in the morning without makeup on and he still confessed to being wildly attracted to her.

She felt a squeeze on her hands and looked down seeing their fingers entwined and her heart flutter thinking of him. She was going to leave him tomorrow. She felt a tear burn her eyes but she didn't want to cry. She didn't want to show she was weak that way. So instead Sarah looked back into Chucks soft eyes, and removed her fingers from his placing both palms on the sides of his face and pulling him to her, closing her eyes and touching her lips to his.

It felt wonderful as it always did when she kissed Chuck. She felt her whole body hum with electricity as Chuck responded to her lips, parting them for her to explore him deeper. It wasn't enough for her though, she wanted all of him, she wanted to possess him and have him possess her. Wrapping her arms tightly behind his neck she slowly slid from the chair she was on and onto the floor with Chuck. He pulled backwards to accommodate her in the space between him and the chair but she didn't want to lose him, she wanted to stay with him so she climbed on top of him pouring out all her emotions with her kiss.

Several hours later she rested her head on Chucks bare chest, curled up against him and entwining her legs with him. She wanted every part of her she could to be against him, touching him. She found it comforting and it quieted her thoughts and emotions about what was to come.

She brushed her fingers lightly against his side and his breath hitched slightly from the feeling interrupting the soft snore that came from him. A smile crossed Sarah's lip and she did it again wanting to hear the sound again. Chuck responded by groaning softly and turning onto his side facing her, bringing her close and holding her securely to him, taking a second to lift his arm to raise the blanket further up to cover their naked forms from the chill of the room before falling back into his sleep.

Sarah couldn't wipe the smile that was on her face, which had been there for several hours. It wouldn't go away and she could feel the muscles in her cheeks burn slightly from it constantly being there. But it was a good pain, like another one she was feeling at the moment.

She was at complete peace with everything in the world right then. Aside from having to leave Chuck tomorrow instead of dwelling on the misery that it is she decided sometime between the second and third round that she would focus on the mission, as she should. Give it her all, give it her attention and she will complete it as soon as possible and come back to her Chuck.

She was still scared to death about all this, this whole relationship thing, the feelings associated with it. She'd never had to worry about telling someone she was leaving for work, and worry about their reactions before. She's never cared about anyone else enough to really give a crap what they thought about anything, but suddenly she cared about Chuck. What Chuck thought what Chuck felt. His opinion about anything was more important to her now than she even cared to admit to herself.

Sighing contently she finally closed her eyes and pressed her cheek further into Chuck's chest again, taking deep breaths and inhaling his scent once more. She wanted to remember this, never to forget it. She knew she would miss it when she was away.

Her final thought before she finally drifted off to a peaceful sleep was a note to herself to sneak into Chuck's room tomorrow before leaving and grab a few shirts for sleeping.

Her smile widened a bit at that as she thought about how Bryce will react to seeing her run around the base in Chucks clothing.

TBC.

A/N: As always please RR, next chap hopefully sunday. Feel free to facebook or twitter friend me to hear more of my witty quips.

Fic Rec: If you're into the Chuck/Casey ship this girl has the BEST story I've ever read. its a tiny series called "Meet the Kin" You'll have to google it as its on livejournal. The authors name is **skyesurfer12**

**Got a fic rec for me? Goodness please say yes. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you to charahkids for being my beta!**

**And here are thanks to those who reviewed:**

**Nomadic Nerd:** I totally agree with everything you said. It remains a mystery. Maybe I'll write something. Or you can write something. Glad Morgan made you laugh. I find him a funny fellow. And I agree with the "less is more" with um..certain scenes.

**MrBi11:** Thanks! Here's the next.

**Shutupnkissme313:** Can I just say as a collector and a Star Wars fan that scene shocked and offended me. Ugh. WTF Sarah!

**Wade1978**: Thank you! I always aim to do my best. I find Bryce to be an asshole and I quite enjoy when he's the butt of the joke.

**phnxgrl:** Who wouldn't want that if their boyfriends were Chuck.

**knightrid3r:** Thank you. Something I say on a regular basis is "Nothing ruins a good plot like a fanfic writer." I do include myself in that of course. The only thing that I can think of that's worst is a good plot with good writing and its NOT FINISHED. Oh my heart hurt there for a second.

**Jimmy 144:** Don't worry, Chuck's always in trouble.

**wilf21:** Words are easy to lie with actions are slightly harder i say

**Neale:** Never fear, Bryce will not get the upper hand while I'm in charge.

**Nerdtastic78:** Thank you very much. I really feel uncomfortable with the romance and I always worry that its too campy and not real. I appreciate the compliment though!

**wassupchuck:** Thanks!

**RABCentralIL**: I agree. I always felt that Chuck was a really strong character. He cares so much for those around him but I always feel its kind of a front at the same time. But regardless of that it doesn't make him weak even if I write him that way because that's how I believe he feels.

**Marc Vun Kannon:** You are right. I just hate him. I'm cool with Jeffster but there's something about them in general i hate. And I will def check out your stuff!

**phathead01:** Well you gotta start somewhere before the angst sets in. Though I'm aiming NOT for angst, I swear.

**sevenrez:** I like when Morgan and Sarah team up for Chuck.

Hows this format of saying thanks?

Chapter 3

The heat from the sun streaming upon her face woke Sarah up the next morning from her peaceful rest. She scrunched closed her eyes tighter wanting the last remnants of sleep to last as long as possible before she inevitably had to get up. She was warm and comfortable, content lying next to Chucks warm body with her head resting on his chest and hearing the rhythmic beat of his heart.

It soothed her like no other sound ever could. Reminding her with each beat that he was alive, and real, and that it belonged to her. He had said he loved her twice last night, for the first time ever and her own heart beat faster at the memory of it.

Her only regret was that she was unable to say it back to him, though she wanted to. She knew the words wouldn't come out if she forced them. Its not to say that she didn't love Chuck back, that was anything but the truth. She loved him more than he possibly loved her but for some reason the words just never came out of her no matter how much she wished they were. It was yet another reason, as if she needed another one, that she loved Chuck so much that he didn't pressure her to return the sentiment. Just taking what she offered and seemingly content with that.

She let out the breath that was held in her lungs again, and told her brain to shut up and stop thinking. Told it that now was the time to not think, to just feel and enjoy. But her mind wouldn't stop its thoughts Chuck, always on Chuck.

But as much as she wished to lie there leisurely in the arms of Chuck, she knew they had to get up and get going. They had to stop by his place for him to change and meet the new agents before she took off with Casey. She laid there a few more moments, enjoying as his thumb drew small circles on the sides of her arm, causing her skin to tingle and bring her to full wakefulness. This would be the last time for a while she'd be able to wake up like this.

She moaned softly, turning her face to Chuck's skin and placing a couple gentle kisses on it, causing his breath to hitch as it tickled him a little.

"Ah, finally awake huh?" He asked her lightly, moving his hands from her arm to run his long fingers through her hair. She was sure if she knew how she'd purr like a kitten. She looked up at him and let a small laugh out at the disarray that was his own hair. It was plastered on one side and sticking up straight on the other. It was hilarious and adorable at the same time. "What?" he asked her with his own grin.

Instead of answering she raised her hand from the bed, lying her chest on his and reaching up to run her fingers through his tresses trying to smother them and plump them at the same time, giggling the whole time much to her alarm. She never giggles. But she didn't stop it, not with the goofy grin that was on Chuck's face while she did.

Eventually she gave up and folded her arm under her chin to look up at him through her lashes, just watching him. Chuck hadn't stopped his soft administrations threw her own hair and the feeling of content just made her want to close her eyes and go back to sleep. To stay that way and bask in his presence for the whole day. But she knew she couldn't.

Looking over to the side of the bed at the clock on her nightstand, she buried her face into his skin and groaned loudly at the time, tickling him once again. It was almost seven and they had to get up and going.

"I don't want to get up." She whined rolling over and trying to untangle her naked form from both Chuck and the blanket that was wrapped around them. Chuck was being no help as he kept trying to keep her in the bed before she swatted his hand away playfully.

"Then don't get up Sarah. Stay in bed with me." He suggested lying back down on the pillow behind him. She stood up from the bed with nothing covering her and stared at him expectantly as his eyes watched her closely obviously enjoying the view.

She allowed it of him since he was such a respectful male in the first place, though if she was honest with herself she quite enjoyed be looked at by Chuck, but soon the beep from her phone reminded her that they had to get ready so she walked away from him to the bathroom, quirking her eyebrow at him before she entered and turned on the water in the tub. A moment later Chuck joined her, wrapping his arms around her and placing kisses along her neck.

"You sure you want to come in Sarah? I mean, I'm only going to be a few minutes." Chuck said as they entered the courtyard to his apartment. They had to stop there before heading to Castle so he could get his Nerd Herd uniform on for work later on.

"Of course I do silly. It's what a girlfriend would do right?" She said as she nudged into him. Chuck smiled and grabbed her hand as they walked around the fountain and to the front door.

Entering the apartment after Chuck unlocked it Sarah took a moment to look around, as she always did whenever she entered someplace. However it was different when she came over to Chucks. She loved this apartment. Even though Chuck was an assignment, way before he became more she couldn't help but fall in love with the place.

The atmosphere was warm and comforting, inviting people in and encouraging them to make themselves home in it. Most environments she's in she always felt alert and on guard but there was something about the way Ellie had decorated and arranged their home that made her feel relaxed and calm. Like nothing bad could happen to her or anyone inside it while they were there.

"Hey guys." Ellie said coming down the hall. Chuck greeted with a peck on the cheek as he headed for his room.

Sarah grinned at their display before walking up to the breakfast nook and sitting on one of the barstools there as Ellie poured them both some coffee. Their display of affection used to freak her out she'd admit. She'd never seen a brother and sister who showed so much affection for one another in any sort of well, normal capacity. But Ellie explained is easily away one day when they had a girl's day out. Explained how with all the hurt they've been through, the abandonment and the hard times, all they had was each other.

But then again, the two of them was very affectionate with just about everyone they came across so she guessed it wasn't really as weird as it seemed at first. Sarah let out a slight snicker at the thought of Chuck coming up and hugging Casey. It was ridiculous sight in her head but it was so Chuck.

"What are you smirking about over here?" Ellie asked her, setting a mug of coffee down in front of her. Sarah thanked her and began doctoring it up to the way she liked it.

"I was just imaging Chuck hugging Casey. You know, with his big dopey smile and eyes closed while Casey would look like he'd kill him." Ellie laughed with her nodding.

"Would be a pretty horrendous yet entertaining sight I believe." They sat in silence a few moments; the only sounds were of the cups being set down and soft noises from the direction of Chuck's room as he got ready for work. Sarah took a deep breath deciding to do some cover maintenance.

"Look Ellie, I gotta talk to you for a second." She leaned forward against the breakfast nook to look down the hall making sure Chuck was not there. Hearing the door shut to the bathroom she estimated she had a few minutes. Ellie looked down the hall as well with brows narrowed and raised in amusement.

"I'm all ears Sarah." She told her. Sarah sat back on her stool and wrapped her fingers around the warm mug that had a picture of a computer on it.

"I uh, I'm going to be leaving this morning for a bit. To the east coast." Sarah started, but jumped slightly from the loud sound of Ellie dropping her cup much harder onto the counter.

"What? Why? Where are you going? Does Chuck know?" She asked alarmed. Sarah nodded her head and held her hand up to calm her.

"Ellie, its fine. Chuck knows. It's completely last minute. My father is really sick and I need to fly back to DC to take care of him." She explained, using the cover that they were telling everyone.

"Oh god, Sarah. I'm so sorry. I hope he'll be ok." Ellie said sympathetically.

"Thank you Ellie. I'm just, more concerned about Chuck though. With me being gone and not knowing how long well…"

"He'll begin to have doubts and drop back into a depression. I understand Sarah. We'll do everything we can to keep his spirits up ok?" She promised sincerely. Sarah knew that Ellie would keep the promise, not even really needing to make one in the first place but she was glad to know that Chuck had a support system set up and that he would be taken care of while she was gone. It put her more at ease about leaving.

"So, you taking anything?" Ellie asked her with a knowing smirk behind her coffee mug. Sarah felt herself blush a little bit and looked down at the counter.

"I don't know what you mean." She replied, not meeting Ellies gaze. Ellie let out a light laugh and shook her head.

"Oh please Sarah. Don't play dumb with me. You know when I went on a three week special course study during my residency I took Devon's pillow with me, and one of his UCLA LA sweatshirts. I slept in it every night. It was pretty gross by the end of the trip." She laughed, drinking more of her coffee.

"And Devon? He didn't mind that you had taken that stuff? Didn't find it weird at all?" She asked curiously. Ellie shook her head.

"No, turned out he slept with my nightgown under my pillow the whole time and surrounded him with all my junk. If anyone should have been creped out it should have been me." She stated. They were silent for a few moments until the bathroom door opened announcing Chuck.

"Uh, Ellie, can you…."

"Sure. Hey Chuck, can you help me with the bird feeder thing. It's stuck on again and they are out of food." She called down the hall. A few moments later Chuck showed up, dressed in his white button down shirt and black slacks waiting for work and looking at his watch.

"Can I do it later El? We're gonna be late." But Ellie wouldn't take no for an answer and grabbed hold of his arm and dragged him outside.

Once they were out of view Sarah got up from her seat and quickly went down the hall to Chuck's room, opening the cracked door silently. She looked around his room thinking about what it was she would want to take before heading to his dresser where he kept his t-shirts.

On top of it was a pile of shirts that didn't make it into the hamper. They weren't really classified as dirty by most people's perspectives having only been worn once, but Chuck had a thing against dirty clothes. She reached into the pile picking up a couple of T-shirts. One that was black with the word Nerd on it, the other had some kind of game console on it with the words "talk nerdy to me". She decided they would be perfect to take and folded them up as small as possible and shoved them into her purse, glad she had opted for the bigger bag today.

She turned from the dresser and began to leave the room when one final thought crossed her mind and she opened a drawer on the middle left. She reached in grabbing a two pair of clean boxers, one with the star wars logo on them and the other just a plain green plaid. She'd found out a few months ago that they were actually very comfortable and the perfect size to wear as sleep shorts and had been slowly stealing them from him ever since, already having a few pairs packed.

Finished with her thieving she turned once more to leave, walking down the hall hearing Chuck and Ellies voices. She met them in the living room and gave a small smile, her face feeling flushed thinking about what she just did.

"Hey! There you are, we gotta go Sarah if we're gonna be on time." Chuck said heading towards the door. They bid Ellie farewell and headed towards her car. They were half way to the Orange Orange before Chuck broke the silence.

"I hope you didn't take the shirt with the Wookie on it, that's my fave."

Sarah was all grins and smiles by the time they finally reached the Orange Orange 20 minutes later. How could she not be? She dreaded the mission and had dreaded telling Chuck, but Chuck in all his infinite patience, understanding, and just being him, understood, and telling him wasn't as bad as she thought it would. He told the honest truth, that he didn't trust Bryce but he trusted her and that was enough for her. She had his trust, always had and she would do nothing to compromise that.

They stopped at the back of the store where a small garage was where she'd be keeping her car; the entire lot in front of it was empty as the Orange Orange was temporarily closed. Chuck got out quickly as she turned off the car and rushed around the front of it to open her door. She looked up at him surprised for a moment before reaching out and taking the hand that was offered to help her out of it, looking around for a moment before reaching on her toes to place a gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth.

She gripped his hand tightly and began walking towards the back entrance of the store, using her keys to get in dragging Chuck behind her. They entered the freezer and imputed the security codes in order to get into Castle before descending the stairs.

They heard voices down the hall as they got to the bottom of the stairs and Sarah reluctantly released Chuck's hand. Casey may unofficially know about the two of them but considering it was against the rules it was best if the new agents didn't know how important Chuck was to Sarah.

A moment later Casey turned around the corner from the armory into the main room stopping at the sight of Sarah and Chuck loitering by the stairs. Sarah glanced at Chuck for a moment, noticing his small smile and nervous twitching at seeing the new agents approach them. She couldn't blame him for being nervous with almost all the Agents Chuck has ever met in one way or another caused some kind of stress or strife in his life.

"Agent Walker, thank you for gracing us with your presence this morning." Casey said sarcastically eying her before looking over at Chuck. "I see you dragged Bartowski here as well."

Sarah crossed her arms over her chest and stared hard at him for putting them on the spot, but she could tell by the way his jaw was clenched that he was barely restraining himself from smashing something into someone's head.

"Yes, I apologize for being late. You left it to me to tell Chuck of the mission and it, well, took a little longer than normal." She said giving a sly smile towards Chuck. It was immediately wiped off her face however when the average height male, Agent Leyan cleared his throat and stepped forward.

Everything happened quickly next. She felt Chuck begin to shake and Casey took a step forward effectively blocking the view of the new agents. They waited patiently as Chucks eyes rolled up into his head as the flash that was undoubtedly giving him the stats on the new additions finished up. She quietly cursed herself and Casey for not thinking about this earlier and showing him their profiles before now.

Soon though it finished and he breathed heavily and shook his head clearing whatever was lingering. Sarah gently rubbed his back as Casey's hard eyes watched him carefully for any sign that it might not be finished as he held his hand on Chuck's upper arm helping him to stay upright.

"Excuse me, but you had to drag your asset here?" one of the new agents asked curiously, interrupting them. Sarah gave Casey a glare before shaking her head and looking over his broad shoulder to respond.

"Major Casey is just joking of course. Chuck is a very easy asset to work with. He's very cooperative and understanding of the situation and you will have no trouble with him at all." She stated as Casey grunted an amused sound which she translated into 'yeah right'

"I see. Chuck Bartowski, my name is Agent Andrew Leyan. You may call me Agent Leyman or sir." He introduced seriously, not smiling at all and holding his hand out. Chuck reached out reluctantly and shook it. "This is Agent Coleman."

The woman standing behind him stepped out in front and Sarah's eyes narrowed slightly. She made a mental note to talk to the people who take the profile photos because the photograph did this agent no justice. She was even more beautiful in person with the perfect figure, the brownish of brown hair and dark chocolate eyes. She was wearing a blouse with a black jacket and a matching pleated skirt that was almost against regulations. The look was too reminiscent of a catholic school girl then a federal agent.

"You can call me Mira, Chuck. After all I have a feeling we're going to get to know a lot about each other during the time we're together." She said shaking his hand. Sarah was going to slap this girl then stab her with the knives she has hidden on her person if Chuck had held onto the woman's hand any longer.

Luckily for her Chuck was naturally a nervous guy and having someone so blatantly hit on him to the point where even he noticed and began freaking out at least brought some comfort for Sarah knowing that he'll at least be on the lookout and not just fall into a situation.

"It's uh, nice to meet you Agent Coleman." Chuck choked out taking his hand back and shoving it into his pocket. He took a couple steps back from the woman, slightly hiding behind Sarah.

The agent laughed lightly, clearly amused by Chuck's discomfort. Sarah narrowed her eyes at her again and stepped slightly in front of Chuck to shield him.

"Well Chuck, this is going to be fun."

"You're not here to have fun Agent Coleman; you're here to protect the asset." Sarah growled out annoyed, ignoring the smirk on the agents face.

"Of course Agent Walker. The asset will be very well tended to in our capable hands." Agent Colman assured.

The next hour was spent as they handed out instructions and briefed the other two agents on Castle and protocols involving Chuck's protection. Sarah felt annoyed at the lack of seriousness both agents seemed to be placing on this assignment, as if seeing it as some kind of joke or easy assignment they could sleep through.

Granted they didn't quite understand how important Chuck was to national security but she still felt that they should be slightly more professional then they were acting. She especially didn't like the way Agent Coleman had been looking at Chuck, like he was some kind of meal to be devoured.

Which in her opinion he was in some respects, but that was her right she felt as his fake cover girlfriend but real secret girlfriend.

She was debating if she should say something or warn the agent off of Chuck but decided against it. Their relationship hindered on nobody really knowing the truth about it. That those who are meant to think it was real thought it was and those who believe it to be fake thought that as well. It was a complicated situation they found themselves in but it was working, and she wasn't willing to give it up.

Besides she trusted Chuck. She knew he would stutter and stumble and be placed in awkward situations with this agent but she trusted Chuck. He trusted her and she trusted him. That's all there was too it.

Much too soon for her liking it was time for her to go. She bid the other agents goodbye and went up the stairs to the nerd herder they were taking to the airport with Casey and Chuck since Chuck had to work the afternoon shift.

The drive was much too short for her liking. She sat in the front seat of the herder her fingers entwined with his as he rested his own hand on the gear shift and watched as the secrecy passed them. The closer she got to the airport the more she didn't want to leave. The more she wanted to stay here in Burbank with Chuck.

Too soon again they approached the airport, going onto the tarmac right up to a waiting plane that will take them to their next destination. They stood outside the car; wind blowing roughly around them, blowing their hair every which way and making their faces burn slightly from the force. Chuck came to stand by her on the passenger's side as Casey unloaded the duffle bags of mostly weapons and begin loading them onto the plane.

She turned to Chuck then, looking up his towering form and into his soft brown eyes. She felt tears begin to prick at the corners but she wouldn't allow herself to cry. She was stronger than that. And besides, this wasn't goodbye; it was a see you later. But still, one tear managed to escape the brave mask she had placed on.

Chuck reached up with his right hand and gently wiped it away before tilting her chin up so she could look at him more. She wanted nothing more than to stand on her toes and wrap her arms around his neck and place a kiss on his lips so passionate it would fast-forward time and she wouldn't have to leave. But she couldn't, they couldn't. They were in the public now, in full view of many other agents as well as surveillance. They had to be professional.

"I'll be back Chuck. I promise." She told him, and he nodded his head. "I'll call you every night. And I'm just a phone call away. Call me for anything; no matter how stupid it is, even if it's just to complain about the Buy More."

"I will." He replied. She sniffled a little as another tear escaped.

"And you be good, ok? Do what you're told. Stay out of trouble." She lectured. "Be safe." Chuck nodded his understanding.

"I promise to just go to work and come home or to Morgan's. If I flash I'll call you or Casey immediately but I won't pursue it any further." He told her taking a step closer to her. "God I want to kiss you."

She smiled at that, the feeling of elation at hearing him voice her own thoughts. They were in sync with each other, something she had never really felt before outside a professional situation. She felt the same way with Bryce, but that was during missions and such, not in a personal capacity.

Giving one last look at him she brushed her hand gently over his arm in comfort before turning around to begin walking away. She however was stopped by Chuck as he reached out for her hand, holding it tightly in his own causing her to look at him one last time.

He had a huge toothy grin on his face and suddenly everything felt like it would be alright for them.

"Save you later." He said as he let his hand slip from hers. She felt something in his palm and slipped it between two of her fingers to snag it. Giving him one last smile she finally turned back to the plane and got on it.

The plane was empty aside from her and Casey and she took a seat on the side of the plane where Chuck was waiting with the herder. She stared out the window at him as he leaned against it and wanting to take in the sight of him for as long as she could, not knowing when she'll see him again. She didn't look away from him until the plane had begun down the runway and she lost view of him.

Turning from the window she brought her hand up to her cheek and whipped away the tears that were beginning to form, grimacing slightly at the feel of paper against it. Looking down in her hand was the piece of paper she had exchanged to Chuck that she had yet to read. Giving one last sniff she unfolded the piece of paper, but reading the words that were obviously written in haste caused her heart to ache and eyes to close as tears fell freely. She held on to the paper tightly and brought it to her chest as she softly called Chucks name, and that she loved him too. And she promised that when she got back, the second they are together again she will tell him that in person.

A/N: Alrighty, taking today and my weekend off. Shall start writing ch4 on weds. I'd start now but I'm too irritated. (I'm at work and people are being dumb) oh well. As always feel free to follow me on fb &amp; twitter.

Missy


	4. Chapter 4

Finally chapter 4. My woes are at the bottom if you wish to read them. Thank you to Charahkids for beta reading again!

**phnxgrl: **Thank you for reviewing!

**Nomadic Nerd:** Ah, I'm releived that its not campy. It is so far out of my element and comfort zone and I find it difficult to boarder a the line of campy and realistic. Don't worry, morgan update will come soon.

**Neale:** Well, some people make it work. others its like, how cliche could you get?

**phathead01:** I'll get you my pretty, and your little heart strings too *evil cackle*

**doc2or:** chp1: He may get a cheese puff binge in. Could be fun. Chp2: I wanted him to stronger about the news. I feel people write him too whiny but he gots through so much crap that he's bound to build some kind of walls to stand on. And though she may not admit it, i alawys felt Sarah had the emotions, she just wouldn't let them 3: reading your review i just realized i made sarah the emotional one *facepalm* will correct that in future episodes.

**sevenrez:** Thank you. It just seems like something people do, steal each others clothes. Its one of the main things peopel say they miss about their partners when they are separate, their smell and their snore. Kinda weird.

**Jimmy 144:** Thank you!

**knightrid3r:** Dont worry. With me in charge Bryce will get his commupance. I hate the bastard.

**Wade1978:**Thanks! i have a few twists I hope people will tolerate :)

**wilf21:** The boogeymen? i dunno but i don't like them.

**Nerdtastic78:** Ohhh good. Campy sucks. I'm actually really excited to write this story, there are so many directions i can go. its just picking the best one to tell the most interesting story possible.

**MrBi11:** Damn and they are all a story in themselvs. I think i should quit whilei 'm ahead. 

Chapter 4

Chuck sighed loudly before tipping his head back to stare at the ceiling of the Buy More. It had only been about two hours since he came back from dropping off his handlers at the airport and he already felt their missing presence immensely.

It had been a slow day already, a typical Wednesday at the Buy More being the middle of the week. There were only about three customers in the store and there had been no work orders all day for offsite assistance so Chuck had spent the last four hours of his shift sitting mindlessly at the nerd herd desk filing install reports from the other Nerd Herders. He knew he should make them do it themselves, knowing that while half of them were pointless in existence most of the time, the other half were actually good at their jobs. But as the Supervisor he was responsible for all of them and their work, and despite his own flakey attendance record he did take pride in at least knowing that everything else was ship shaped in the Nerd Herd section of Buymoria.

Glancing towards the appliances for a second, Chuck signed. Instead of seeing Casey's large form stalking the area looking for prey it was some short guy with bald spots all around his head. He was desperately missing his team already and it had only been a few hours. He had no idea how he was going to last day or weeks, or even…he didn't even want to think the word months.

"Chuck my bro what is up." Morgan said hopping on the counter, causing Chuck to pop out of his chair alarmed. He felt a pop in his neck from the movement and groaned out at the momentary pain he felt there.

"Morgan, what have I-"

"I know I know, I'm sorry Chuck. You just look so out of it." Morgan replied, not really seeming sorry at all. "What's got you down homes."

Chuck sighed for a moment debating his words. He knew he had to tell Morgan that Sarah was gone for a while but he really didn't want to talk about it. The whole cover/real relationship was complicated. Really complicated. With Morgan he could be honest with him, talk it through, mope. But then again with all the surveillance around him he was afraid of what would be picked up by those who watched it as too real to be a cover. What was too much cover maintenance.

He let out a sigh, exhausted at all the thinking. His mind had been running on full all day as his life once again felt like it was being uplifted from its meager existence. He thought he'd be used to this, everything changing at the drop of a hat, but he's noticing that the more it happens the more it hits him and takes him longer to adjust.

Sitting back down in his chair, he looked over at Morgan's patient face and sighed. He had to tell him something so going with their cover story he decided to let Morgan come up with his own ideas and just run with it, so if anything gets out of control he can explain them away as Morgan.

"I noticed your leading lady is not at the Orange Orange." Morgan commented as Chuck opened his mouth to talk. A small smile crossed his face. Morgan really was the best friend in the world. Though he wasn't sure if he should be concerned if Morgan was secretly stalking Sarah to keep tabs on her.

"Uh, yeah, she's out of town for a while." Chuck explained sadly. That wasn't fake, he really was sad she was gone.

"Oh? A while huh? How come?" His friend dug a little.

"Well, you see, her father, who is on the east coast is sick. And she's gone back to take care of him. So she'll be gone a while." He explained to his friend. Morgan nodded his head understanding and clicked the pen he had in his hand a few times, he was in Dr. Morgan mode now.

"An understandable reason to leave temporarily. If it were say, Ellie or yours truly I know you would travel cross country to take care of us." He said. Chuck quirked his brow at Morgan. He wasn't surprised that Morgan was being supportive of him but he was defending Sarah for leaving, which was a little odd.

"Uh, yeah of course Morgan." Though why he would be on the opposite coast he wouldn't question.

"It doesn't mean she lo…likes you even less. I mean you know what they say Chuck, absence makes the heart grow fonder."

With that comment Chuck's brows narrowed. Something was up and he didn't know what it was, wasn't quite sure he wanted to find out either so he just let it slip for now.

"Yeah, I know Morgan. Still, it hurts a bit and I'll miss her a lot. I'm trying not to go all crazy stalker and text her a billion times." He admitted, though he couldn't wait to get her phone call. She promised to call him sometime tonight after she met up with Bryce and got more information on the meeting.

He had a number of questions he wanted to ask about this mission. They had been too preoccupied with other things last night to discuss the particulars of what was going on. Then this morning they had to brief his new temporary handlers on his well, handling.

"I understand Chuck. She just left a few hours ago right? Did she tell you when she'll call or anything?" He probed. This conversation was getting weird for Chuck. It was calm and sane, something he never associated when talking to Morgan about peoples love lives.

"Well, she said she'll call me tonight after she gets settled and figures what's going on. "

"Excellent, let's have a mopey guy night then." Morgan suggested finally hopping down off the desk and turning back to Chuck excitingly.

"Mopey guy night?" He asked picking up his phone as it beeped indicating a message. He hoped it was from Sarah but he didn't recognize the number, but he figured out who it could be. The message simply read "Come to Castle after work."

"Yeah, because you know, I know you're down about Sarah going out of town and all so we can mope and eat junk food and play video games. Then when she calls you'll talk to her for a few hours then we can get on to real guy night. What you say man?" Morgan held his hand up for a high five as Chuck put his phone back down and looked at him.

"Would love to buddy but don't you have a date tonight with Anna?" He reminded him. Morgan lowered his hand and shrugged.

"Don't worry man. She'll totally understand. You know how it is, bros before hoes." He replied causing Chuck to once again quirk his brow.

"Yeah, buddy, let me give you some advice, though I'm sure I'm in no real position to do so. First off, you can't blow your date off tonight, she will not understand. Unless it involves a hospital or prison you are going to have to go. It's your one year anniversary and considering it took a year and half of on again off again to accumulate to one year you have to go." Morgan was about to protest but Chuck raised his finger in silence. " Second, while I understand your love of 'bros before hoes' concept, and I really appreciate it as I've been the receiving end of this notion all our lives, you have got to either stop calling it that or don't say it at all."

"What? What's wrong with the bro code with hoes?" Morgan asked confused.

"Morgan, most women don't like to be referred to, especially hearing it from their boyfriends as 'hoes'." He explained patiently, stacking up the papers he had been working on. Morgan thought about it for a few moments before nodding reluctantly at his friend.

"You're right Chuck. No more using the term 'hoe'" And with that he turned around and went back to the home theater probably for a nap.

Chuck just shook his head and sat back down to begin working on the invoices again. He adored his friend but sometimes, he found Morgan completely clueless.

Several agonizing hours later Chuck was finally free to leave the store. After locking up the invoices and making sure Jeff and Lester would do the closing procedures for the Nerd Herd he finally left the store.

He gave a great sight of relief as he stepped out into the late California air. A small smile was on his face for a moment before it fell at remembering that Sarah was not there. Sarah was someplace far away from where he was, and with Bryce.

'Don't think like that' He berated himself. He pulled his phone out and checked the time and for any messages before deciding he should head to Castle. He wasn't quite sure what the new agents wanted, since they weren't going on missions or anything but they were his handlers and he was going to do everything he can to be good so Casey and Sarah wouldn't worry and focus on the mission at hand to get back as soon as possible.

Chuck used his key Sarah had given him after Castle was built and he entered the frozen yogurt place. He walked behind the counter and headed for the freezer before stopping a second. With his stomach growling he decided to have some yogurt, especially since they had gotten the cake batter flavor. So tossing on some gummy worms, wishing he had some sliced strawberries instead he finally headed to the freezer.

He entered Castle, eating his free yogurt and headed down the stairs but stopped at the bottom abruptly at seeing the two other agents there. They had a stack of files that were between them and a few each in front of them. Seeing them stare at him he really wished Sarah and Casey were there to hide behind.

Agent Leyan sat on one side of the table and glared hard at him from where he sat. Chuck couldn't help but swallow the yogurt that was in his mouth hard at the disdain he saw there. He wasn't quite sure why but Agent Leyan didn't seem to like him.

Agent Coleman however had a wicked smile across her face as she stared at him and his snack. He couldn't help the shudder that ran down his spine as her predatory look made him feel as if she were undressing him, and suddenly he felt underdressed in his Nerd Herd attire.

"Hey guys." He said, using his free hand to give them a slight wave. Agent Leyan gave a look of disdain before pointing his pen at a chair opposite the both of them. Chuck reluctantly sat down and watched the both of them.

"Did you pay for that Bartowski?" Leyan barked suddenly causing Chuck to jump a little in his seat. Chuck swallowed again and shook his head.

"No, uh Sarah said it's alright. In fact she usually insists upon it by sending me up to get some so she and Casey could presumably talk about me." He started. He had more to say about it but by the look the Agent was giving him he wouldn't appreciate Chuck's babble.

"That is government Property Bartowski. It's not free. Someone has to pay for it. Be sure to do that on your way out tonight." He told him. Chuck wasn't sure but it sounded like an order more than a suggestion or request. He just nodded his understanding and made a silent vow to not have any more until Sarah came back.

Which will suck for him.

Losing his appetite Chuck moved the offending bowl away from himself and to the side and placed his hands calmly on the table and waited for whatever it was his presence was requested for. It was silent for several moments and the tension began getting to Chuck and he started to fidget in his chair.

"So, uh, what did you guys want to talk to me about." He asked nervously.

"First off you are to always address us as Agents. You will learn your place Bartowski." Leyan told him harshly. Chucks eyes went wide and his fidgeting stopped.

"Exu…excuse me?" He asked confused.

"Agents. We are Agents and you will address us as such at all times. We brought you here to discuss the rules and protocols you will adhere to while we are here." Leyan informed him, closing the file in front of him a little harder than strictly needed.

"Well, Sarah and Casey-"

"Are not here. Your safety is our responsibility so while they are away you are to follow what we tell you. Starting with rule 1. You are to stay in contact at all times. At no time will you be without your phone and or watch. If we contact you, you are to answer right away regardless of where you are or what you are doing."

"Well that's kind of against Buy M-"

"Rule 2. You are not to go to any location that is not properly approved."

"I have installs I have to do, so I-"

"Rule 3. You are not permitted to go to any location other than home, work, and Castle without proper supervision-"

"Ok Stop." Chuck shouted loudly, shocking himself and the agents in front of him. He shook it off though and stood up from his chair and gave them an annoyed expression, particularly in Agent Leyans direction.

"Sit Down, Bartowski." Leyan growled out. But Chuck just crossed his arms and glared harder.

"No. You don't seem to understand. I am an adult not a child. I understand your job is to protect me and with that in mind I am always conscious and aware of what I do but you can't restrict me." He argued. However neither Agent looked like they understood, or even cared about his predicament.

He sat down again in his seat, arms still crossed and let out a silent sigh. He couldn't believe what these people were trying to do, what they were saying. He didn't like how he was being treated either and wondered if saying something to Sarah would help him or not. After a few moments of silence Agent Coleman stood up from her chair and his eyes widened slightly, not sure what she was going to do. Her flirting had been outrageous and he was more than aware already how dangerous she could be even though he's never seen her in actions.

She kept her eyes on his as she reached for the piece of paper that was in front of Agent Leyan and then walked the few feet from her chair to Chuck until she was slightly towering over his hunched form. Gone were the flirty smile and the sparkling amused eyes, and in front of him now was the woman who was the Agent. The hard cold dark brown eyes were icy and full of danger and he didn't want to be on the other end at the moment.

"I think it's you who does not understand Mr. Bartowski." She started. He felt pin prickles raise over his skin at how icy and soft her voice was. "You are not an adult. You are not even a person. According to the US Intelligence Community you are nothing but a piece of machine that is to be used at our whim. You are to do what you are told, when you are told to do it. No exceptions."

"I don't thin-" His protest was cut off by a resounding sound and his body being propelled to the right violently. He pulled his crossed arms away and used his lanky arms to help cushion his fall from his chair. Once on the floor he took a second to get his baring's as his left cheek began to burn. Shaking his head he looked up to the stony face of Agent Coleman as she glared down to his form on the floor as though he was a fungus that needed to be eliminated.

"Don't you ever interrupt me. You will regret it Mr. Bartowski." With that she dropped the piece of paper she was holding till it fell on him before sliding to the floor. He looked down upon it and saw numbers and the rules to which he was expected to follow. "Read this, memorize it, and follow it. Perhaps by being the good little boy you'll get rewarded."

With that comment the stony coldness disappeared into the smirky flirt he had seen the first time they meant. Chuck couldn't stop the shiver that went down his spine at that and he turned away to get up on his knees. He couldn't look at the two agents. He felt pinpricks on the corner of his eyes, his cheek still stinging from the slap.

"Is there anything else?" He asked, his voice choked as he tried to keep his emotions under control until he could get out of there.

He didn't hear anything behind him and presumed that the two agents were doing that weird agent thing they did and read each other's minds. He didn't want to turn to see them, so he just picked up the piece of paper and began reading it. He wasn't sure how he would comply with them. Especially with his job.

"No. You may go." Agent Coleman told him, voice light as it was the first time they met. She turned away and went back to her seat. Chuck finally got off the floor and with his head down and the paper clutched in his hand he walked by them quickly and headed up the stairs.

"Don't forget to pay for the food." Leyan reminded him before he exited the door.

Stepping out of the freezer Chuck stood there for a moment taking a few deep breaths, trying to calm his heart rate. He wasn't sure what to do next. He knew he should go home but suddenly he didn't feel like it. His emotions and adrenaline was running high and he felt frazzled and out of control. The last thing he needed at the second was to deal with Ellie or Awesome, both of who were home tonight seeing him upset and demanding answers.

A thought popped into his head on where to go and he held on to it with all his might. With a destination in mind he quickly went out to the main room of the Orange Orange, tossing $5 bill on the counter and quickly exited the door.

Once outside he felt for a moment like he could breathe again and he slowed down as he crossed the parking lot towards Sarah's car. It was a beacon to him and he felt drawn to it. He had to stand next to it for a few moments to gain his senses, not wanting to accidently damage it while driving.

To say he was shocked when she handed him her keys and told him he could borrow her car while she was away was an understatement. She hemmed and hawed and gave all sorts of logical reasons such as she didn't want it sitting around not being run, or it had security and GPS so she can track him.

But he understood the gesture. He had known that by admitting to her out loud for the first time that he loved her and expressing so openly how he genuinely trusted her that it would freak her out a little bit. He didn't want her to say the words back. Well that's not true, he was desperate to hear the words come out of her, but he didn't want to force it. He wanted it to be natural and on her terms so he knew that she meant them.

But Sarah handing him her keys to the car she loved so much, the only thing that was really truly hers, he got the message. It was her telling him that she trusted him explicitly. And that kind of trust coming from Agent Sarah Walker of the CIA was very rare and precious and to be taken seriously. So he had no intent of damaging her car.

The thought of Sarah and her trust calmed him down immensely. Taking one last look around the emptying parking lot, the only stragglers were the remaining employees stuck doing the closing shifts at the various store in the plaza, he sighed one last time and then got into the car.

His body felt buzzed and electrified as he sat in the driver's seat. He could see why Sarah loved this car so much. It was so powerful and fast and for someone who was constantly running away from things, it was a great way to get away as fast as possible.

He turned on the ignition and felt the engine turn before it began humming. Putting his seatbelt on Chuck paused one last time before finally putting the car in drive and heading out of the parking lot towards his destination.

It handled like a dream and soon Chuck was off on his way, deciding to take the freeway and really fire it up. It was glorious and the pit that he felt in his stomach all day began to leave as he let himself finally relax and just enjoy the drive. The freeway was nearly empty it being past 10pm on a Saturday so he decided to just stay on the freeway for a bit and then double back, enjoying the drive with the windows down and the wind blowing his already wild curls all over the place.

Too soon for his liking though it had to come to an end and he pulled up into the spot reserved for Sarah at her hotel room. He knew he probably shouldn't be there, that it was probably against his new rules he was to follow but at the second, he didn't care. There had been so many changes in the past 24 hours that he just felt overwhelmed.

Without a second though he exited the car and headed up to Sarah room. He paused outside the door, needing the moment to gather his wits as the sadness hit him that she was not on the other side waiting for him. The ding of the elevator as others got off on that floor forced him to finally get the key out and unlock it.

He stood at the entry way of the room as he closed the door and looked around. It looked the same as it did that morning, as Sarah didn't have time to come back. He bent down to where her shirt lay from where he tossed it the night before and proceeded to fold it and set it on the table nearby. He did that with all the other clothes that were thrown around, not all from last night of course making sure her room was clean and tidy for when she finally came back.

He lost track of time as he did chores, scrubbing the bathroom and changing the bedding. He tidied up the various papers and books lying around. Sarah wasn't a slob, he knew that and wasn't bothered by the task he assigned himself. He knew she was just busy and being a human being, even the fabulous Sarah Walker couldn't be tidy 100% of the time.

Soon though his phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket. Seeing Sarah's smile beaming up at him he clicked on accept and put the phone to his ear.

"Hey Sarah." His voice croaked slightly as he pressed the phone hard to his ear, desperate to hear her voice.

"Hey Chuck. I miss you." She said after a moment. A smile broke out on Chuck's face and he walked over to sit on the bed.

"I miss you too. You have no idea how much." He confessed and he heard her laugh lightly on the other side.

"Oh, I'm sure I know. Probably as much as me." She told him. They sat in silence for a few moments, just enjoying that the other was there.

"So uh, how is, wherever you are?"

"Oh, we're in Maryland. So far it's just been briefing on what's been going on. It's kind of dull."

"Does that mean you'll be home soon?" He could almost hear her smile on the other side.

"I wish Chuck. It's looking like it could be about a month, maybe two." Chuck felt his heart sink at that, not really wanting to contemplate two months without Sarah. "But Bryce is already pissing off Casey so he's with me on getting this done. I promise we'll be home soon."

"I know you will. It's just really hard without you." He thought about what about what happened earlier and thought about telling her about it. He should tell her about it. But he didn't want her to think he was a wimp or something.

"I know it is Chuck. But you'll be ok. I'm always just a phone call away." She reassured, and he did feel reassured a bit.

"Yeah, one monitored phone call away you mean. If there was a problem and I called you about it they would know before you got here." He griped, flopping back on the bed and suppressing the moan he wanted to let out at how strangely comfortable it was.

"You don't have to worry about that Chuck." She said and he perked up slightly sitting up.

"What do you mean?"

"My phone is encrypted and yours is as well. We can monitor your calls except to encrypted lines. All they'll see is you're making a phone call but they can't hear anything." She informed him. He was glad to hear that, ecstatic. He didn't even want to let himself think about how he would have to be careful what he said on the phone to Sarah.

"I cannot tell you how glad I am to hear that." He admitted to her. She didn't respond right away and he was beginning to worry, not quite sure if he said something he shouldn't. "Sarah?" He asked, testing the line.

"There is something Chuck." She started, her voice lower and boxed in like she was in a corner.

"What is it?" He asked curiously. She didn't answer for a full minute and he was both slightly ware and curious.

"I want you to go into my closet and turn on the overhead light and go to the safe." She instructed. He looked at the phone curiously for a second before complying with her request.

"Alright, here at the safe." He announced.

"The combo for the safe is 16, 42, 17." Chuck got on his knees and hunched his tall form toward the lock to see the numbers. The lock sprang open and pulled the door opened only to see another Safe inside it.

"Ok, I see another safe." He announced.

"Take the safe out of there so you can push the outer safe away from the where it is." She instructed further.

Chuck put the phone down on the floor away so he won't crush it on accident. Reaching into the outer safe he pulled out the inner one, groaning at feeling how heavy it was. He hoped he wasn't going to have to put it back. With that out of the way he crawled over and pushed the other safe away leaving the floor below it bare. He picked up his phone, breath slightly racing at the exertion of playing musical safes.

"Done. Now what." He asked.

"Ok, note how the carpet is because you're going to have to fix it. But pull it up from the corner and there will be some loose floorboards. Take those off and there is another safe in there." Not even bothering to make a funny comment he followed the directions. "Press 3392641#"

Chuck followed directions once again and then opened the top of the safe, his jaw dropping at what he saw inside. There was at least $10k in there in twenties. There were various bags that had papers and ID's, and there were several cell phones.

"Sarah, what is all this stuff?" He asked her stunned.

"Chuck, look, you are so so important, to the intelligence community. Your new handlers are vetted at the highest level but, we can't lose you. I can't lose you." She admitted. Chucks heart beat faster at the admission that she needed him.

"I can't lose you either Sarah." He told her vehemently. He heard a hitch on the other end and he could just image her trying to control her own emotions over the situation. He wished he was there for her to help her.

"Casey agrees with me that you need to be prepared. I want you to grab two of the phones. Keep one in your room and one at the Nerd Herd desk. There is already a couple in my car. Under the passenger seat there is a catch and you can lift the flooring and there's a hiding spot."

"Sarah I-"

"Listen Chuck this is very important ok? If there is any trouble at all with your handlers if you're near one of the phones and I want you to get in the car and drive away and call me. If you can't grab one of the other phones find someplace safe to park once you're far away and get that stuff. Call right away. There are new driver's licenses in there for you as well as some cash. You're going to go off grid until Casey and I can get there."

"Sarah, you're kind of freaking me out here."

"I know Chuck but," She paused and he could hear her take a few calming breaths. "This is important ok. You have to be safe, even if it's from those who are sent to protect you."

Once again Chuck thought about telling her about what happened at Castle earlier, and about the rules that are being enforced upon him. But he didn't really feel he was in real danger and Sarah sounded worked up enough. He was worried that if she knew she would lose focus and something bad could happen.

"I promise Sarah. I'll be safe. I'll keep them near." He told her. They were silent for a few moments, letting the seriousness of the situation stretch out between them. "Sarah?" He asked. She didn't answer right away but he knew she wouldn't.

"Yeah Chuck."

"I love you. Don't forget that, please be safe." He told her earnestly.

"I know Chuck. Don't worry, I'll be fine." He heard a knocking on her end and her call of 'on moment'. "Hey I got to go but I'll call you tomorrow ok? Stay safe." She said.

They finished with goodbye and Chuck reached in and grabbed a couple of phones before fixing the carpet and putting the safes back to gather. Gathering himself up he went over to the bed, her bed, and kicking off his shoes plopped down on what had been her side and relaxed. He knew he should go home, that his handlers probably weren't happy he wasn't already there, but he was just so tired, and her pillow smelled just like her.

A/N: Oiy. I know I said weds but my tale of woe is i'm on new sleep drugs that don't work so i haven't slept for 5 days. except 1 day when i took 3 benedryl with it and then i had that hangover. So i couldn't write. I FINALLY got some sleep the night before last and poof! wrote the chapter. So here it is. But on top of that I went to the dentist, which i'm usually cool about except the xrays. It took over an hour and i threw up twice. So i'm tramatized. Oh and my sister was in a car accident with my car. Feels good to vent.

Well i'm off to have a cinnabon for a snack then consider writing. TAH!


	5. Chapter 5

Thank you to Charahkids For being my Beta. Other thanks to:

phnxgr: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you are enjoying it.

sevenre: I have no idea what they are going to do. So many options, so little attention span.

Wade1978: Oh Casey will get his chance with Bryce. Dont worry :)

phathead0: its slightly better this week! thanks for reviewing.

wilf21: Me and Chuck. both had crap weeks. We'll bake it better.

Nerdtastic78: I'd have a back up plan too. Who knows what kind of crazy peopel were watching my boy-toy.

Jimmy 144: Always the agent!

Neale: When the teachers away the children will play.

knightrid3r: Rough weeks suck. You're welcome to vent at me. And they may be away and not directly his handlers but they still feel responsible for him.

ChuckFan2015:I know what you mean. Im playing it that Beckman specifically left out how important Chuck was in order to protect him further if that makes sense.

Chapter 5

The knock sounded again as Sarah disconnected the phone. She had a feeling she knew who it was but she prayed she was wrong. She didn't want to deal with this now, or ever if she could.

"Coming." She said as she walked to the door of her hotel room giving one last silent prayer to whatever deity that was listening that it be Casey. She stopped on the other side of the door and looked through the peek hole giving a silent groan to see Bryce standing on the other side. She let out another hard breath as she fought to not roll her eyes.

"What is it Bryce." She hollered through the door exasperated, not caring that he could hear it in her voice. There was a pause on the other side as he obviously analyzed her tone.

"Can I come in?" He asked hesitantly.

"I'm going to bed Bryce, we have an early day." She told him annoyed and hoping he got the hint. She felt his hand gently touch the door.

"I know, it's just, can I come in please. I don't really want to talk like this where everyone can hear." He shouted back. Sarah thought for a moment debating back and forth in her mind the wisdom of letting him into her room before finally relenting and unlocked the door, allowing him to enter.

She walked away from it towards the bed, waiting for Bryce to come in. She heard the door click shut a moment later and turned around to face him, then sat on the edge of her bed waiting expectantly for him to say what he came to talk to her about. She crossed her legs and placed her hands in her lap and waited for him to speak, but all he seemed to be doing was gawking at her attired and standing at the door stunned.

She didn't have to look down to know what he was staring at. She had just gotten ready for bed before she called Chuck and was currently wearing his Nerd shirt with a pair of boxers with the Star Wars logo on it. She knew what she looked like. She was well aware of her looks and that most men found her to be a blonde goddess with legs that went on for miles. So she didn't have to really think outside the box how she looked in clothes made for a nerd. And for some reason she always forgot how big a Nerd Bryce Larkin actually was. She didn't even know about it until she met Chuck.

"Wow….Sarah, I…" Bryce stumbled with his words before he began slowly taking of his coat off. Sarah quirked her brow at him for a moment before giving a small smirk.

"Uh, Bryce, what are you doing?" She asked him as he dropped his jacket on the chair nearby. He looked at her confused before starting to unbutton his shirt.

"What do you think I'm doing?" He said with a saucy smirk of his own, his eyes glazing over slightly as they roamed over her body. He sauntered slowly over to her with his fingers still twisting the buttons undone until his shirt lay opened showing his undershirt. He came to sit on the bed next to her and placed a hand on her thigh and leaned over only to come to an abrupt stop as Sarah slapped him.

"Ow! Sarah what the hell." He said loudly as she stood up and walked away from him. She sat down in the chair by the window Indian style and leaning on her elbows on her legs. "What is your problem?" He bit out at her.

"You are my problem Bryce. Did you seriously think you could come over to my hotel room and we would just have sex? What kind of girl do you take me for?" She angrily accused. He glared angrily back at her and rubbed his cheek a few more seconds before finally lowering it.

"I thought that as two agents who are very well acquainted with each other we can let out some frustrations and get reacquainted. Damn it Sarah I was dead, and we were separated. We missed a lot of time together."

"By no fault of mine Bryce. You went rogue."

"I had to! I didn't want you to get involved." He shouted at her. Sarah glared at him and sat up straighter in her chair considering her words carefully.

"You're supposed to trust your partner Bryce. Undividedly. You broke that trust with me. You went rogue and left me behind to deal with the mess." She said as calmly as possible. To his credit Bryce looked slightly embarrassed that he had done that. He stood up from his spot and walked closer to Sarah, sitting in the chair opposite her.

"I know and I'm sorry Sarah. God you have no idea how sorry I am." She watched him as he looked away from her and out the window, watching the lights on the horizon flicker. For a second she felt sorry for him, being in such a crappy predicament. But he did bring it on himself. "Why didn't you meet me?" he asked her.

It was Sarah's turn to move turn away. She stood up from her chair again and walked a bit away, arms crossed over her chest. The answer was simple. It was Chuck. It was because of Chuck. That's all there was too it. She had thought about it the day after, going on that crazy mission and seducing Lon Kirk. By the end of the mission she had to admit it to herself, and it was the first time she did, that she had feelings for Chuck. She was there to protect him, to handle him but she had admitted to herself that there was something more that kept her there. As much as she missed Bryce, his company and the exciting missions that came along with being his partner, she couldn't bring herself to think of him the same way as she did before. She was different, she had changed, and it was all because of him and his actions.

"I had an assignment Bryce. One I got because of you. I couldn't just up and leave. Chuck needs protection." She argued.

"Chuck can be protected by anyone Sarah. He doesn't need you." Bryce countered. Sarah couldn't meet his eye, afraid to admit what was in her mind and heart, at least to Bryce. She's only finally admitted it to herself, and was working on telling Chuck. She didn't want to discuss this with Bryce but she was beginning to think she didn't have a choice.

She didn't reply to him, just turned away from him and walked towards the door to open it, hopefully giving him the hint that she wanted him to leave. But just as she reached the door and was reaching out for the handle he placed his hand on the back of the door and leaned his weight on it to stop her.

"What have you done?" He bit out angrily. She stepped back taken aback by the venom in his voice and stared at him alarmed for a moment before stepping forward again with her own anger flaring.

"What the hell do you mean?" She ground out heatedly. Bryce lowered his hand from the door and walked back towards the window anger pouring from his body, obviously needing distance from her.

"You're sleeping with him aren't you?" He stated, not really as a question. Sarah didn't answer, didn't feel she needed to, though she felt the need to defend herself and Chuck. Bryce turned to her for a moment before turning again and swiping his arm across the table knocking everything that was on it to the floor.

Sarah jumped back slightly alarmed at his behavior, not quite understanding why he was so angry at this, and honestly, not really caring as it wasn't his business. The more she thought of that the more fury roared threw her own body and refused to take any of his crap. She walked right up to him and grabbed his arm in a tight hold forcing him to look at her.

"What the hell are you doing Bryce?" She demanded of him. He tugged his arm forcibly from her grip.

"How could you do that to him? Really Sarah? You couldn't find any better way to handle him?" He yelled in her face.

"It's none of your concern what happens between Chuck and me Bryce, so I suggest you back off." She bit back.

Bryce let out a frustrated sigh and covered his eyes with one hand crossing the other one over his chest. Sarah wasn't quite sure what was going on in his mind, what exactly he was seemingly so upset about.

"You have to stop it Sarah. You have to break that off and you have to leave him." He said dropping his hand and staring into her blue eyes. His jaw was set telling her how serious he was about the demand. She couldn't help it; she let out a light laugh. She should be angry at him but she found the whole situation getting kind of funny.

"No." She said after a few moments. She let herself fall down on the bed and sat there at the edge still laughing. This whole thing was absurd.

"It's not funny Sarah. You don't understand." He said starting to sound desperate.

"Then tell me Bryce because I obviously don't understand. You come in here late at night expecting for me to forget everything that's happened for the past two years and just hop right back into bed with you, then you get upset at finding out I'm sleeping with Chuck and demand I stop. After everything you've done do you really think I would sit around and wait for you?" She asked incredulously.

"No but I didn't think you would go and fuck my best friend either." He retorted. Once again Sarah laughed, amused at his hurt expression. She knew it wasn't very nice to do and Chuck would frown at her behavior but this man had hurt both her and Chuck and she didn't care.

"Your best friend? I think he stopped being your best friend when you stabbed him the back and got him expelled from school then slept with his girlfriend Bryce." She commented sardonically. "You may still think of him as your best friend, but I doubt he does."

"I did what I had to do to save him Sarah." He argued. "You weren't there." Sarah nodded her head, understanding his point but she wasn't about to let him off so easily.

"I'm not disagreeing with what you did Bryce. I've seen the files of what happened to the participants of Project Omaha. And even with the knowledge we know now that he can handle it, the thought that he might have ended up like the others scares me to death. I'm glad you stopped him. But how you did it Bryce…" She wasn't sure what to say. What he did was beyond reprehensible and she knew he already beat himself up frequently for it.

"I did it to save him Sarah."

"But you didn't have to destroy him Bryce." She yelled at him, the laughter finally leaving her filling her with anger. Anger for Chuck for everything he's gone through. "You knew Chuck; you knew what he's gone through in his life. There had to be a better way."

Bryce suddenly looked worn and tired, the fight leaving him. It was obvious that he has spent a lot of time running the same thing over and over in his head over the years. She had known it too, though not the specific thought.

She had noticed it starting from the beginning of their partnership, how on silent moments and the random spaces of time off they had, how he would sit usually outside and his eyes would glaze over deep in thought. She often wondered over the years what it was that he thought about, what made him look so troubled and so sad. She had asked him, of course, many times but he never told her, not really. His answers were always vague and fractured, but always full of regret. That was one thing she understood and shared with him, all agents did.

"There was no better way Sarah, I was in the CIA by then." He countered, but it just made her feel angrier.

"You were already in the CIA but you still fucked him over and got him kicked out of school. Why didn't you just go all the way and explain it to him. You knew Chuck, he is understanding. He trusted you. If you had told him your concerns he would have listened to you."

"And what if he hadn't Sarah. What then? What if he decided that it's what he wanted? He was so desperate to be liked, to be needed. He would have let the CIA use him then throw him away without any regard to him." He argued somberly.

Sarah had to take a few more calming breaths and cool her mind and emotions. She wanted to strangle Bryce, there was no doubt about that, but she could tell that he did genuinely care for his friend. It was always amazing to her how much loyalty Chuck instilled in others for him. There was just something about him that was disarming and made anyone, even hardened killers like her, Bryce, and Casey want to do anything in their power to keep him safe, to protect him. To care about him, and others.

She wanted to agree with Bryce, and she hated thinking about what would happen if he had been given the choice and had gone along with it. To allow the government to use him as a test subject for Project Omaha. But she also understood Chuck. Especially more so now since she finally gave in to him. He was a kind person who never wanted to harm anyone, even just hurting their feelings. A trait she loved about him but also something that she knows has caused him much heartache.

Chuck's life had always been out of his control, constantly moving and changing. She understood that part of him as it was always her life as well. But while she had always been moving on, learning from her father, coning people, learning not to trust, Chuck was in a different boat. He was abandoned by both his parents, left to be raised by his sister who was far too young to be taking care of a teenaged boy. He had spent his childhood trying to be the best he could, never get into trouble, helping whenever he could to make things easier on his sister. But no matter how hard he worked, how kind he was, everything always got uprooted until the final betrayal by his so called best friend.

She cringed internally at thinking about her first thoughts about Chuck. That he was just a highly intelligent underachieving unmotivated lazy geek. He was nice enough but he was just lazy, like Morgan. But she had learned, rather quickly that it was the complete opposite. That it wasn't laziness or motivation; he was just hurt and lacked any confidence. And hearing all that Bryce had done made her feel slightly guilty even though she had nothing to do with. She had grown to dislike Bryce for what he did to Chuck the more she got to know him. But seeing Chuck basically forgive his former friend for yet again screwing with his life by sending him the intersect, she let it go. Let go of the anger she felt at the injustice Bryce brought upon Chuck.

"It would have been his choice Bryce." She finally replied. "He trusted you, and I believe he would have listened to you and weighed your opinion heavily on the decision of what to do." Bryce nodded his head, getting at what she was saying, knowing it was true. But she knew he still worried about it. That the risk of Chuck not listening to him was too high for him to be comfortable with.

"I know it's just, ever since I met him, I just needed to-"

"Protect him?" She finished for him smiling. "Yeah, he does instill that in people doesn't he?" They shared a light laugh for a second before a comfortable silence spread between them.

It was like old times, how it was now. They didn't always speak, didn't have to, neither one being really big on small talk. They had spent countless hours together just lost in their own heads, comfortable with the other one present while they let their minds drift.

"Do you care about him?" Bryce's voice broke through her haze, gazing at her. She wanted to tell him to mind his business but she couldn't and she nodded.

"More than I can really admit." She whispered. Bryce nodded his own head and stood up from the bed and stretched. She watched him as he slowly lowered his arms from above his head and turn back to her.

"Look, just, don't hurt him ok? He may not consider me a friend anymore for all I've done to him, but I still consider him one. And despite what you think, I do care about Chuck. I don't want him to be hurt. And, I don't want you to be hurt either." With that he turned away from her one last time and walked out the door without a second glance. She didn't stop him, didn't want to. They had come to an understanding and that was the end of that. Over as quickly as it had started.

At least she had some happy news to tell Chuck the next time they talked. He trusts her, but that doesn't mean that he's not worried, not thinking about what is happening there with her and Bryce. Now she can tell him that she put him off and hopefully put his mind to rest.

She sighed loudly and let her body fall back onto the bed and she closed her eyes for a moment. She felt so comfortable at the moment that she thought she could just fall asleep like that, not bother with actually climbing into bed. She laid there for several minutes basking in the warmth of the comforter that covered the bedding but she couldn't fully enjoy it.

Opening her eyes she stared at the ceiling as her heart sank a little bit. She missed Chuck. She wanted him with her. Sure she had spent nights apart from him; they had to so the higher powers wouldn't suspect anything. However they had spent the majority of their nights together since they finally began their secret real relationship, and the bed just felt so wrong without Chuck there. She missed his warmth that his body provided for her and his touch as he drew slow circles on her body lulling her to sleep. She missed his scent most of all and just being with him.

With that in mind she pulled herself up off the bed and walked over to where her suitcase laid opened and pulled out the item she had hidden in the bottom of the case in a hidden recess and pulled it out. Letting it fall slightly to unfold it she brought the shirt up to her face and inhaled the scent that was distinctly Chuck. She smiled as she pulled it away slightly, wondering idly if he would notice one of his Nerd Herd shirts and ties missing from his wardrobe. He had left it there one night and she had hidden it away from him so he couldn't claim it back. It caused a flutter in her chest at remembering it, and knowing she had it. It was a secret, something a real girl would do, not something a trained spy would and she loved the feeling.

Her phone rang, causing her to jump slightly at the sudden noise. Noticing it was her cell she felt a small bit of heat rise up her neck at being cause so unaware. Walking back to the bed with the shirt in hand she picked it up and saw Morgan's name on the display. She forgot she had made arrangements to speak to Morgan that night and with a groan she answered the phone.

"Hey Morgan." She answered as friendly as possible, closing her eyes and praying that the call will be over quickly.

"Hey Sarah. Just wanted to give you the first update on our mutual friend." He said. Sarah held back rolling her eyes. She didn't expect to have a daily update on Chuck from Morgan but she couldn't help but be glad Chuck had such dedicated friends.

"Well I just talked to him and he seemed alright." She informed him, she could almost hear Morgan nod his agreement.

"Yes well, he's taking kinda hard but it's only been the first day. I suggested a mopey guy's night-"

"Mopey guys night?" She interrupted confused.

"Yeah. You know. He was all mopey that you were gone so we'd you know, play video games and talk about feelings and stuff. You know. Guy stuff." He explained as if it were plainly obvious to anyone with half a brain.

Sarah pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes. She couldn't tell if she was amused or exasperated. It wasn't a normal thing; she knew that, for guys to get together, play video games and get all emotionally bonded. But for some reason it worked for Chuck and Morgan and she found the whole thing kind of enduring.

"Well did he go for it?" She finally asked after shaking her head.

"Well, no, he was waiting for your call and decided to not like do it but still, I attempted. Don't worry though fair maiden I think he'll be ok." Sarah opened her eyes and lowered her hand as she listened to his words.

"Thank you Morgan. I really appreciate your dedication to Chuck." She said as sincerely as possible. She really did appreciate him, at least at the moment.

"No problem, with that in mind Sarah, may I ask you for a favor in return." She knew this was bound to come up sometime, she just hoped it wouldn't be something weird.

"Uh, yeah Morgan. What can I do for you?" She asked hesitantly. There was silence on the other end for a moment as she cringed at what his request may be.

"Well you see, Sarah, there's this fair that's going on downtown and like, I thought it would be super fun if Chuck and I could go and like hang out like we used to." He started. Sarah was confused.

"Uh, Morgan, Chuck doesn't need my permission to do things with you. I trust you and him to not do anything well, creepy." She cringed at herself for saying that part out loud. To her relief Morgan just laughed it off.

"Yeah, I understand. But you see, Chuck was going to take you and you see he's kinda down cause you know, you have to take care of your dad which he totally understands because you know, its Chuck, but maybe if you like, suggest it to him or tell him to he might actually go."

Sarah could hear the hopefulness in Morgan's voice, and she understood. She could tell through the surveillance that surrounded Chuck how frustrated Morgan was at the lack of time Chuck has had for him lately. And though she knew he fully blamed it on her presence he never once begrudged Chuck that. He was always supportive of them and their relationship, whether it is real or fake.

"I think that's a great idea Morgan." She told him. She could hear the excitement edged in his voice.

"Really? Like really really?" He asked her and she let out a laugh at his enthusiasm.

"Yes Morgan really. I think this is a great opportunity for you and Chuck to spend some quality time together without me being in the way."

"Oh no, Sarah you're never in the way." He said with such sincerity that she almost didn't trust it. She had learned not to trust honesty and sincerity since people generally are neither. But something in the way Morgan said it, she believed.

"Yeah I am. I know how much you want to hang out with Chuck but he's out on dates with me, or I'm over at dinner with Ellie and Awesome." She argued, but Morgan just let out a tsking sound.

"No no. Sarah. I get it, I do. Chuck and me, we've had a lot of fun. And we will still have fun. We're best friends and always will be." He stated firmly.

"Morgan, I-"

"Really, it's ok Sarah. We had to grow up at some point. And yeah, I'll admit, it sucks sometimes because I still want to be young and stupid, but no matter how much I whine and complain I can't forget what you did for Chuck." Sarah gave a silent scoff as the memories of all the pain and heartache she's caused Chuck over the past two years flittered through her mind.

"I didn't do anything for Chuck, Morgan." She stated softly, fully believing it. But Morgan's indignant snort on the other line meant he obviously disagreed with her.

"Didn't do anything? Please. Look, I know I'm not the smartest guy in town. But one thing I do know is Chuck was made for greater things then working a dead end job at the Buy More. Yeah he's been stuck in a rut for years but then you came along and suddenly everything's different." He paused for a moment, and she's grateful, needing the moment to let her mind reel in everything he's saying. "Yeah there are some things I don't like, like he's not as reliable as before and seriously I think he's keeping secrets but Sarah he's living again. He's out and about and as much as I hate it I think he might actually leave the Buy More someday. And it's all because of you."

Sarah didn't know what to say and she didn't think she could say it even if she did. She held her breath in, trying not to breathe, afraid that once she opened her mouth all her emotions would fly out and she wouldn't be able to stop them. It was a new feeling to her, something she's never experienced in her life. But yet again Chuck, with whatever magical powers he had over people broke down the walls that she hid her emotions behind.

"Are you ok Sarah?" Morgan asked after several moments of silence. Her eyes found a spot on the ceiling above her as she sat on the end of her bed and counted to ten before finally muttering she was fine.

"Thank you Morgan, I…I really needed to hear that." She admitted.

"Anytime Sarah. Really anytime. You and Chuck are gold in my book." He cleared his throat and a smile crept on her face realizing he probably was getting choked up too. "So uh, you'll talk to Chuck tomorrow about this? We both have Friday off, I thought it would be fun, then maybe you know, play some games or something. We have to log some serious Call of Duty time to make up if ya know what I mean." He said. Letting another laugh out at his antics Sarah nodded.

"Yeah, I'll talk to him. You two have fun at the fair ok?" She waited for his answer before saying goodnight to him and disconnecting.

She sat on the edge of her bed for a moment longer before once again falling backwards onto the mattress. She stared up at the ceiling for a few moments before lying on her side and curling up into a fetal position wrapping an arm around her knees and the other on holding the Nerd Herd shirt close to her. Closing her eyes she let go all the tension that remained in her body and finally let her mind wander free. She fell asleep a short time later with a small smile on her face and dreams of Chuck.

A/N: Nothing really to report here. Oh! i bought 39 bottles of China Glaze nail polish. cost me $73 but come on! they're like $7-10 bottle! i saved A LOT of money. Um...a customer threatened to punch me in the face. thats all. its been a pretty mild week actually. *shrugs*


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thank you to Charahkids for being my beta! I Adore you!

Marc Vun Kannon: Wait...you like Bryce? *awkward silence* I must apologize in advance then.

charahkids: 39 bottles lasts hella long especially when you have over 200. China Glaze is my 3rd fave polish. The Rolls Royce is most likely OPI. And that is your polish knowledge for the day.

wilf21: I totally love Morgan. A Lot. I always want include him.

sevenrez: Squishing Bryce is what we do best! Don't worry. Casey will not hide his feelings on how he feels about him.

beachmama777: Thanks! hope you continue to enjoy it.

Neale: I think Bryce is a douchbag in general. I do believe that he has good intentions towards Chuck, but he has a really crap way of going about it.

phnxgrl: A peaceful Sarah is a less deadly Sarah I say.

phathead01: He still has plenty of time...

MrBi11: I thought about that but I've never been to one myself.

Shutupnkissme313: I hate Bryce and feel he's a major douchebag but I like to think that he does care for his friend and want him to be happy, even though he keeps hurting him.

uplink2: *facepalm* I totally made it seem like he didn't think of her as a friend. Oh well. And as I said many times, i LOVES Morgan. And I Love Morgan/Sarah working together for the greater good of Chuck. More of them is to come!

Wade197: I know I'm totally excited about Casey. Which is why I didn't write it yet. I gotta dream it up. I had to put that part of Bryce drooling over Sarah. I've noticed that Chuck's nerdiness is frequently pointed out but its never mentioned to remind us that Bryce, in all his spy glory is in fact a huge nerd as well. And yes, what's a threat to the face between people eh?

Nerdtastic78: If she's not careful she may turn into a real girl!

Ok, on to the Story:

Chapter 6

Pulling into his spot near his apartment, Chuck turned the ignition off and sat in his car. He enjoyed the silence that surrounded him for the first time since he woke up that morning and he closed his eyes leaning his head against the back of the seat.

It was a good day. Ok, it was a great day. He was surprised by Sarah the day before telling him he should go to the fair with Morgan. He hadn't really wanted to go for a myriad of reasons, one of them being the memories it brought back to him of Jill, both the good and the bad, but he couldn't deny her request. She sounded so saddened at thinking he would just spend all his time alone in his apartment, waiting for her to come back that she practically forced him out the door through the phone.

He knew she cared about him and worried a lot about him. It wasn't that hard to figure out. Everyone who knew anything about Chuck was well aware about his history of depression but he was determined to stay positive. He loved her, and he was pretty sure that she loved him back even though she hasn't said the words yet, and that really was all he needed to get through his days without her. Or at least that's what he told himself whenever those feelings of doubt and loneliness crept up on him. He was just really grateful for his friends and family, especially Morgan at the moment who just wanted him to have fun.

And he did have a great time, and he didn't think of Jill or have any horrible flashbacks at all. He didn't have any flashes either which was something he was expecting to have frequently considering the history of carneys and fairs. But to his delight nothing happened. And it was great to spend the day with Morgan for the first time in forever. He didn't realize till they headed for the fair how much he actually missed his little bearded friend. How easy it was to talk to him, how supportive his friend was. He had felt guilty for abandoning him so much lately and for ignoring him.

However Morgan being Morgan immediately picked up on his feelings of guilt and shot him down, telling him it was no big deal and that they at least had now. Yet again he was grateful for having Morgan Grimes as his best friend.

They had gone early, wanting to get a chance to go on all the rides before it truly got too busy and they had spent hours just running around like children in a candy store. They rode the rides, stuffed themselves sick with sweets and greasy fair foods, and played the games that lined the walkways, Chuck earning a few prizes to give to Sarah when she returns, before meeting up with some of the other employees of the Buy More.

They had migrated their party to a nearby pub for dinner and drinks, having a drinking contest which ended up in Morgan, Lester and Jeff being the winners. They called it a draw after Skip had to drop out after throwing up, to much cheering and groaning. The owners were not quite as amused and told them to end the contest or leave.

Unfortunately for Chuck he had been named the designated driver by default and therefore had to take everyone home. Not sure exactly how the intersect would react to large amounts of liquor, and not wanting to cause any problems by testing it with Casey and Sarah not around, he had stuck to only drinking a few beers, much to the dismay of his fellow Buymorians.

Jeff may be the reigning alcoholic but Chuck with his amazing talent of holding his liquor due to all the practice he had while being a frat boy at Stanford, drinking contests were usually a highlight of any activity with the Buy More employees. They had chanted, cheered and eventually booed when he put his foot down and said no.

It was the first time all day that Chuck had wished Sarah was there, and it was a sobering thought, making the bit of alcohol he did consume quickly leave his fuzzy mind clear. He hadn't thought of her all day really, not having time to as Morgan had kept him busy, but right then at the bar with his friends he wished she was there too. Not only help him keep the crowd of geeks under control and spend time with her in such an environment but he wouldn't have minded partaking in the drinking contest knowing he could easily win against Jeff. Or in the very least seeing if he could get her to drink enough to lower her inhibitions enough to tell him more about herself.

Chuck let out a sigh and a smile crept upon his face thinking on Sarah. She was more open now, that was a fact. It was something he loved and he ate up every bit of information she was willing to give him freely, no matter what it was. He wanted more, definitely and he knew if he really wanted to find out he could always just try to flash on her file in the Intersect but he didn't want that. He wanted her to tell him. To trust him enough with the information to tell him herself.

The loud sound of something hitting the hood of the Nerd Herder that Chuck was sitting in caused him to jump up alarmed and look around quickly for any danger that may be present, not relaxing in the slightest at spotting Agent Leyan standing at the front of the car with his arms now crossed in front of his chest. Chuck let out a loud sigh as he took his seatbelt off and opened the door, preparing to face the music. He had a curfew of 9pm and it was well past midnight, and by the expression on Agent Leyan's face he was not amused that Chuck had disregarded the rules he himself had placed.

"Evening Ag-"

"Where the hell have you been?" Agent Leyan asked him angrily. Not knowing what to say exactly and if he was honest with himself was a little afraid of the buff super-agent in front of him, Chuck just shrugged his shoulders as his reply. It was obviously not the answer the angry agent in front of him was waiting for as he narrowed his eyes directly at Chuck.

"You're three hours late for your curfew and we didn't know where you were all day. Do you have any idea how embarrassing it was to tell the General that in less than 48 hours we've misplaced her asset?"

Chuck's mouth moved slightly as he felt the heat begin to rise in his cheeks. He was being scolded like a teenager that stayed out too late and went out without permission.

"I told you yesterday that –"

"Your request to go to the festival was denied Bartowski. It was too much of a security risk."

"Sarah said-"

"Agent Walker is not here Bartowski. You are you to follow our orders now. Not hers. Now get inside. General Beckman requested your presence." With that Agent Leyan turned away from the car and began walking into the courtyard of the apartment complex. Not knowing what else to do or say Chuck beeped the Herder locked and slowly followed the agent's path.

Agent Leyan stood off to the side by Casey's door while Agent Coleman sat in front of him on the fountains edge. He gave a wary glance to both of them before he tried slipping passed them and into Casey's apartment.

He stopped at the door way, looking around the room. It looked different from what he remembered just the week before. All the boards that littered around the room with photos and details of everyone who came in contact with Chuck was gone, as well as the small cache of weapons that was usually in line for cleaning that usually rested on tables. The security systems that had been set up all over Casey's apartment to aid him in keeping track of Chuck as well in their various missions were also scaled down to the bare minimum. It looked nothing like Casey's apartment and he wondered if it from Casey locking everything away or from the two new agents staking their claims. He sincerely hopped it was the former.

Either way he didn't feel it bode well for him.

He didn't have much time for gawking as he was pushed roughly from behind further into the apartment, his feet tangling slightly in them and he tripped on the edge of the rug that lay near the door. He fell on his knees, using his hands to stop his face from hitting the floor. Heat rose up from his neck and colored his cheeks at the embarrassment, wondering if there would ever be a time he would gain complete control of his overly lanky limbs.

Neither Leyan nor Coleman assisted him up as they entered the living room and stood at attention in front of the screen and Chuck was forced to get back up, repressing the groan from the ache in his limbs as he stood up to his full height and joined them.

"Thank you for joining us Mr. Bartowski." The general's voice startled him as she came on the secure screen that hung on the wall of Casey's living room. He jumped slightly before walking further into the room and standing in front of it. He cringed internally at seeing her normally annoyed expression that was usually reserved for him deepen now at finally seeing him. From the way her hair was down and the bed behind her it wasn't hard to surmise that she had been about to go to sleep.

"Evening general. That night gown looks good on you, is that silk?" He started babbling but a hardened glare from the General cut him off pretty quickly.

"Agents Leyan and Coleman informed me earlier when I called that they did not know where you were. So please enlighten us Mr. Bartowski. Where have you been all day?" She queried.

Yet again Chuck felt like a little kid being scolded for going out when he wasn't supposed to and he hated that feeling. He didn't like feeling like he was on a leash but the angry annoyed glares that was coming at him from the two agents in the room as well as the General on the screen did nothing to help his spine get in alignment to really defend himself.

"I told them yesterday that I was going to the fair with Morgan." He said lamely. "They knew where I was."

"We did not General. We informed Mr. Bartowski that he was not to go as it would be too much of a security risk." Leyan cut in speaking directly to the General.

"I told you there was no danger. It was just downtown LA."

"He expressly disobeyed direct orders to stay at home where we can-"

"I had permission to go!"

"That's enough." General Beckman cut in obviously hearing enough from both the agents and from him. Chuck looked away from Agent Leyan and looked directly at the floor, feeling his cheeks flare red at the general yelling at them.

"General I – "

"I said enough Agent Layan." She barked once more glaring hard at her own agent. They stood there in the room facing the small General for several moments, the tension rising as the silence stretched out before the General gave an impatient sigh before sitting back a bit on her bed revealing slightly more skin then Chuck even knew she had. It was becoming uncomfortable to Chuck as he tried to bite his lower lip to stop himself from blurting something out. Of course it didn't work.

"General, I'm sorry but- "

"Who gave you permission Bartowski?" She inquired, though he knew she was aware who it was and really didn't need to ask.

"Last night when I spoke to Sarah she told me I should go to the fair with Morgan and have some fun." He admitted, not looking at the other two Agents in the room. They knew all this, he had told them this when he informed them of his plans.

"Did Agent Walker give you any precautions about going?" She inquired and Chuck nodded his head.

"Of course General. I kept my phone and my watch on. I stayed in the main area of the fair-"

"General it's not safe for the asset to go wondering off by himself. We denied his request-"Agent Leyan was cut off by Beckman raising her hand and she turned back to Chuck.

"I understand your position Agent Leyan, and I shall deal with Agent Walker." She cut him off again. Chuck felt his stomach churn at that and hoped he didn't get Sarah into any trouble.

"General she just wants me to take the down time and relax a little bit. You know, reacquaint myself with my friends and family and you know…" He trailed off, not quite sure if anything he said would hurt or help Sarah in anyway. He could never quite tell with the General.

"Bartowski I want you at Castle at 0800 tomorrow morning. You are dismissed." She said in her normal abrupt way, leaving no room for argument. Before he could protest or anything else could be said the screen went black and the room was left in silence.

Afraid to look at the annoyed agents on either side of him Chuck instead stared at the screen for a moment or two longer before turning around to exit Casey's apartment, only to have his way blocked by Agent Leyan.

"Thank you Bartowski for making us look like a pair of idiots in front of the General." Leyan said voice dripping with anger. "Why don't you try to make us look incompetent while we're at it?"

"I'm sure you can do that job on your own without my help don't you think." Chuck replied sarcastically, regretting it the instant he felt a fist grab a clump of hair from the back of his head and pull backwards. He yet at a yelp in pain as his eyes met that of Agent Coleman blazing cold ones yet again.

"I'd watch your tone Bartowski; you don't want things to get unpleasant for you." She maliciously whispered into his ear causing the hairs on the back of his neck to raise before she abruptly let go of her hold and pushed him away from her.

He cringed as his hand went to his head where his scalp stung slightly from the pull and tried not to glare back at her, not wanting anything else to go horribly wrong.

"Using the word 'get' implies that it's not already unpleasant already. I think you two are doing a great job in making my life miserable and it's only been two days." Chuck bit out turning to leave once again. He had only gotten a few steps before he felt his knees give out and he crashed to the floor as Leyan retracted his foot from where he kicked him.

Chuck rolled onto his back, not wanting to not be able to see them as he tried to sit up and get off the floor only to have Colman's foot smash into the side of his face causing him to collapse onto his back once again. He laid there dazed for a moment before blinking his eyes a few times and brining his hand up to where his face stung from the kick and looked up at his handlers with alarm. His chest heaved as he tried to control his breathing and stop himself from crying out in pain.

He wasn't sure what to do and for the first time in forever he felt speechless. The all too familiar feeling of fear coursed through him as he watched the Agents stand above him, towering over his form like giants and he tried to stop himself from curling up in the fetal position he was so familiar with from all the beatings by bullies on the playground during his youth. He knew that it was a sign of weakness and while he was plenty scared, he also did just spent almost two years with spies and luckily to his surprise grew some courage during that time. He didn't want to show them weakness, didn't want to show them that they could so easily knock him around if he didn't do as they say. But at the same time he really was afraid of them.

"Don't." He simply said as they approached him further.

"Just a reminder that you are the asset, we are the Agents. You will learn your place Bartowski even if we have to beat it into you. Do you understand?" Leyan growled at him. Chuck couldn't answer, his voice suddenly not working. After another swift kick to his hip causing him to finally curl up and moan in pain he spit out his understanding as he felt his body pulsate from the adrenaline and pain.

"Good, now be a good little asset and go home and go right to bed. You heard the General; you are to be at castle at 8am. We'll be carpooling to make sure you aren't late." Agent Coleman told him as she crouched down next to his head and gently ran her fingers through his hair. Chuck closed his eyes against it hating himself from enjoying the feeling of human contact, though he was repulsed by it.

With one last tug of his hair Agent Coleman stood up and stepped over him heading for the staircase. Chuck opened his eyes just a sliver and watched her go, counting to ten before finally rolling over again on his knees, groaning in pain slightly as he tried to get up. Leyan stood off to the side watching him, offering no assistance as he expected and he crawled to his feet and proceeded to stumble to the door, exiting it as quickly as possible.

The cool breeze of outside caused his cheek to burn even more as he went to the Morgan door of his room and entered his apartment that way, not wanting to deal at the moment with Devon or Ellie if they were up, especially since he didn't know if there was any visible damage to his face yet.

He climbed into the darkened window of his room, groaning softly as he lifted his stiff leg that had been kicked over the sill and stumbled slightly as he collapsed fully face first onto the bed. He let out a breath of air as he turned his face to the side that didn't hurt so he could get some air in his lungs.

He thought about getting up and changing his clothes, maybe going to the bathroom and checking out the damage done only moments before but he couldn't bring himself to move. The activities of the day then the events of the last hour had left him drained both emotionally and physically.

He wished Sarah was there. Not only because he knew with her there he'd be safe and sound and wouldn't have the anxiety he did when dealing with Leyan or Coleman. With her around he felt secure and cared for even before they officially got together. No matter where they were personally he always felt like she did care about him at least in the sense where his safety was concerned. Even when Casey manhandled him as frequently as he did, he never felt insecure.

But what he missed most was her presence. He missed her being there next to him, reassuring him, loving him, talking to him. He missed her companionship and everything that it involved. No matter what the situation, whatever was happening or not he felt so comfortable with her and he'd never felt that with anybody. Not even Morgan or Ellie.

A small smile crept on his face at that thought, wondering what she would say if he confessed that out of everyone in his world she was the one he felt most comfortable talking to. Considering how uncomfortable she was even talking to herself, in the none crazy way of course it would probably freak her out a little bit. Just another reason to love her.

He thought about calling her, desperately wanting to hear her voice. They didn't talk that night as she knew he'd be out with Morgan. She has expressed that she hoped he would stay out late and do guy things, even making a few suggestions that caused him to blush slightly just thinking about it. He wondered what she thought most guys did when away from their girlfriends, or perhaps maybe he and Morgan were just an exception to the typical way of the world, which wouldn't surprise him, as Morgan too shot down the suggestion with a bright red face.

Chuck was just about to fall asleep with pleasant dreams of Sarah dancing behind his eyelids when the sound of his phone vibrating in his pocket brought him back to full alertness. He groaned in annoyance and exhaustion as he struggled to get into his pocket and pull out the phone, sitting up alert immediately at seeing stern expression of the general staring back at him.

"Hello?" He answered quickly, cringing at realizing he sounded panicked and that the phone had probably rang too many times for a three star general's liking.

"Bartowski, do not say anything other than yes or no do you understand?" She ordered in her typical brashness that was General Diane Beckman.

"Uh, Yes." He said into the phone, looking around his dark room, trying to avoid looking directly into the cameras he knew was placed all over his room.

"Good, you are to report to Castle tomorrow at 0800 for a private meeting. We need you to go over some intelligence that has been gathered today to confirm some identities so we may proceed."

"Yes." He replied, closing his eyes at how lame it sounded to talk to her without her title, but pushing through.

"Good. In light of today's miscommunication of your activates I'm afraid I'm going to have to take control of the operation and keep you in castle. You will receive the details of it tomorrow. Please be on time." With that she disconnected call and left Chuck sitting on his bed staring at his phone for a moment before just tossing it aside and plopping back down on his bed.

'What did she mean by that?' He wondered to himself as he tossed his phone onto the bed. He had an ominous feeling about what it could possibly mean but he didn't want to think about it. Just the thought of being locked in Castle day in and out with the two new Agents sent shivers down his spine.

His mind once again turned to Sarah as he reached his hand up and felt the left side of his face, wincing in pain as he felt what he knew to be a bruise to be forming on his cheek. How would she react when she saw this, what would he say when she inevitably asked about it. He only prayed that she would not be included visibly at least in the briefing tomorrow morning.

A strong twinge of pain shot through his chest at that. He wanted to see her; he would never pass up an opportunity to. He would just have to come up with a valid excuse on what happened, not quite ready to admit the truth to her yet. Not because he was embarrassed that apparently he was getting his ass kicked on what he feels like is going to be a regular basis now and he needs his strong super spy kick ass girlfriend to protect him, but because he didn't want her to worry. If she was too worried about him and being with the Agents who are supposed to protect him then she could be hurt, or killed or something worse. He didn't want that. He didn't want her worried about him.

Feeling the exhaustion pull over him he kicked off his shoes and crawled to the middle of the bed, curling up into as small a position as his lanky form would allow him to, his hip and face burning in protest.

He'd deal with it tomorrow.

A/N: So...Those who follow my stories know that I work in the horse racing industry and with the triple crown coming up fast i have a lot of extra work and responsiblities so sadly, updates may be slower than normal. I'm still hoping for once a week at least.

And there might not be one this week because i've had food poisoning since saturday and i'm having a hard time focusing on anything other then "i want to go home"

Peace out everyone!


	7. Chapter 7

Ah, another chapter. Thank you to my sweet lil Charahkids for reading through this and fixing all my mistakes.

Since I've found I quite enjoy personalizing my reviews for people they will now be at the bottom as to not hinder those who just prefer to read the story. However if you reviewed would like to see if i said Hi, well, read the story on your way down.

~Missy~

Chapter 7

Sarah tapped her pen against the pad of paper that sat in front of her as her mind floated around in space thinking about the one thing that has been on her mind for the past almost two years, Chuck. It was a quiet moment before their briefing with the General, and Sarah knew there were things she could be doing as she waited but her mind just didn't want to focus.

She felt tired, having not really slept much last night. They had been on surveillance, following a suspect that they believed was part of Fulcrum and hoped that he would lead them to something more concrete than just one suspect. It turned out to be a bust. It had been extremely boring as surveillances go. The man in question, a Kevin Dryers didn't do much that would lead to suspicion. All he did was go on a date with some woman that was dressed more like a prostitute then a girlfriend, but to each their own.

They followed the man to an Italian restaurant where he stayed for at least 3 hours, sitting at the window seat with a view of the river below, and annoying the hell out of Sarah. She couldn't figure out what the hell they could be doing in there that took 3 hours in plain view of everyone. The only time she had spent that amount of time in a restaurant other than for missions was on a date with Chuck, and it was only because there was a pinball machine and she let him play a couple rounds while she took care of some business. They attempted several times to get a bug in there but the place was too crowded and noisy and there was no way to do it discreetly so they gave up on that and just sat in the van watching the window.

The man had finally paid the bill and left the restaurant with his date before heading towards some apartment complex a few miles away. It was grubby and run down looking which further proved Sarah's idea that she was a prostitute as there were many similar looking girls milling around. Considering that he lived in a nice house on the other side of town, they presumed it was the girlfriends place and they sat outside until Kevin Dreyer left early the next morning.

All in all it was a bust and they arrived at their base of operations only an hour before after stopping by a Denny's and getting some coffee and breakfast, putting together what they were going to tell the General, which wasn't much. They had a few other leads but they needed Chuck's assistance to see if he flashes and hopefully save them some time.

But that was a half hour away and Sarah was bored and anxious. She wanted to see Chuck. Even though it's been only a few days she wanted to make sure he was ok, and to see him, especially after missing their phone call last night. And especially after the phone call she got from Beckman inquiring if she had given her permission for him to go out to the fair with Morgan. For a moment she thought she was in trouble and was trampling on the other agents authority but to her relief Beckman agreed with her about Chuck.

The intrusion of the Intersect in his life, not only to his mind but every aspect of his life had put a halt on everything Chuck did and believed in almost immediately. It's been a very hard adjustment for him, and he had struggled a lot with it a first. Sarah tried to be there for him, to help him as much as possible. But while he was reluctant and struggling Chuck had always been determined to do the best he can and to help as much as possible. He never played the victim even though he was and always strived to make the best of the situations he frequently found himself in.

But with his success in the field and with the powers that be wanting to utilize the Intersect as much as possible he'd had to forego a lot in order to help save the world over and over again from terrorist and bad guys, all for no pay and crap hours, something she and even Casey had noticed frequently took a toll on him, and in essence them. Something that Sarah and Casey were both in the process of correcting. They both had cover jobs as well as being spies but they took turns watching Chuck. And they got paid pretty well for it as well, whereas Chuck genuinely worked two full time jobs and barely got paid for his real one.

Regardless Sarah argued with Beckman that with him going on missions temporarily on halt it would be a good chance for him to reacquaint himself with his friends and his sister, to smooth out any hurt feelings and cover the cracks that had started to show by the stress of his current life. Beckman had agreed much to her relief.

"No, moron. Who the hell ever taught you how to clean a gun?" Casey's voice broke through her haze and she looked over her shoulder to the table behind her where Casey and Bryce were cleaning their weapons while they waited. It was an odd balance between the two of them with Casey being the aggressor of course and Bryce being his normal smart ass shelf.

"I was trained by the best Casey." Bryce argued, grabbing the rag back that Casey had ripped from his hands.

Sarah rolled her eyes and turned back around. They had been sniping at each other since the day she and Casey had arrived and even though it's only been a few days it was beginning to get on her nerves already. She only pretended to have patience for the job; it didn't mean she actually have any of it.

"The best? You're CIA, that's almost as bad as the FBI." Casey muttered, going back to his own weapon. Sarah rolled her eyes at that.

"You know, Sarah's CIA, you don't seem to rag on her for that." Bryce argued further. Sarah didn't bother to turn around to look Casey in the eye to see his opinion on the matter. It's not like he didn't give her the same shit in the beginning, but she had a feeling he would never let it go in Bryce's case. Luckily for her she had earned his trust and respect over the course of this assignment, and he earned hers as well. It was a strange bond granted.

"Larkin, that's not…Give me that." With that Casey grabbed the rag again and took away Bryce's gun.

"Hey!"

"Let it go Bryce." She said tiredly, going back to tapping her pen. She ignored them after that, not wanting to hear their squabbling until it was time for the briefing. She'd let Casey have his fun, she understood why he was so annoyed and pissed at Bryce. Aside from the normal of it just being Bryce Larkin, asshole extraordinaire of the CIA, Casey took it as an affront to him and his skills with a gun that Bryce was still alive, and he was still smarting from that.

Picking up her phone that lay next to her pad of paper on the table she scrolled to her messages and clicked on Chuck's name, smiling at the last message he sent yesterday morning. It was some kind of joke or reference that she didn't quite get but it still made her smile nonetheless. She wanted to text him but decided against it since she would be seeing him less than ten minutes. She hated that she learned so much to be with Chuck. Not just physically but always in contact with him. To always know what he thought, what he was doing, who he was with. Not in the creepy girlfriend sort of way, or as the CIA Agent kind of way, but she just wanted to be a part of everything involving him. She'd never felt that way before, never wanted it. But now she did, smiling quietly to herself as Chucks warning of her becoming a real girl echoed in her ear.

She was startled as Casey came up from behind her, growling as he apparently noticed what she was doing and sat in the chair next to her. Sarah closed the message she was looking at and tried to contain her smile of amusement not wanting to push his buttons. He'd been very tolerant and understanding, or as much as John Casey could be in her and Chuck's relationship.

A moment later Bryce came into their space as well and sat down on Sarah's other side, ignoring the glare that Casey was giving him. Sarah looked at him as well and quirked her brow at him as he sat back and got comfortable, seemingly not noticing their stares for several moments.

"What?" He asked finally, and Sarah shared a look with Casey.

"Should you really be sitting here in front of the screen numbnuts?" He asked baiting. "You are supposed to be dead after all."

"It's just Chuck isn't it?" He asked them, but Sarah shrugged. She presumed so since they were talking about the mission but she wouldn't be so sure. After silence from her and Casey, Bryce gave a loud annoyed sigh and got up to stand to the side just as the screen beeped and Beckman appeared in front of them, with a grim expression on her face. Well, more grim than normal. Casey and Sarah stood at attention for a moment before Beckman gave a signal to sit down.

"Where is Larkin?" She said in her normal brisk fashion. Bryce came out from the side and took his seat next to Sarah giving a smirk to Casey, who didn't respond at all.

"Sorry General, we weren't sure if the other Agents would be in the room or not." He explained. Beckman nodded her understand then pushed a few keys on the keyboard in front of her, making her image smaller and bringing up the live feed from Castle.

"Oh my god, Chuck! What happened?" Sarah said immediately sitting straight up and forward at seeing Chucks face. Anger and alarm coursed through her body at seeing the bruise that covered a large portion of the left side of Chucks face. She immediately berated herself for allowing him to go to the fair and her mind was checking off suspects in her mind on who she would need to kill for damaging her boyfriend.

"Uh, hi Sarah" He said timidly, not looking at the screen. It didn't help to quell her anger. If anything it made it burn more inside her.

"Chuck, what happened?" She asked more forcefully. General Beckman cleared her throat slightly, breaking up whatever else Sarah was going to say and she turned her attention to her boss.

"It appears that Mr. Bartowski slipped and fell sneaking into his bedroom through the window last night. As a result it created the bruise." The General told them, though by the tone in her voice Sarah wasn't sure she believed him. Sarah sure didn't. Chuck had been sneaking in and out of that bedroom for years. Along with other people much to her dismay. There was nothing there to trip on, Chuck made sure of that a long time ago as he didn't want his little bearded friend getting hurt entering the 'Morgan Door'. There is no way he could suddenly trip and hurt himself, at least that badly.

Next to her she heard Casey grunt out something that she couldn't really decipher with the blood pounding in her ear, but it sounded like disbelief as well.

"Chuck…" She started but with another growl from Casey she temporarily let it drop, but didn't remove her eyes from the image of Chuck who had yet to look at the camera.

"I'm sure we can all agree that Mr. Bartowski needs to be more careful with himself." General Beckman stated. "That being said, I have decided that during the duration of this mission it would be best if we confine Mr. Bartowski to Castle as much as possible to limit his exposure to the outside world"

"What?" Sarah asked harshly, not caring that she sounded insubordinate. Looking at Chuck through the screen he was finally looking into the camera with his mouth gaping and eyes wide in alarm as well with the news.

"General is that really necessary?" Casey cut in before Sarah could say anything. General Beckman sat back in her chair and placed her hands in front of her.

"Yes Major Casey I believe it is. After the events of yesterday it's been determined that it's too much of a risk having the Intersect out and about without proper protection, and it's been decided already that the new agents are not to know that Mr. Bartowski is the Intersect."

"But what about his job? His family? This mission could take months; he's not going to get that amount of time off without suspicion." Sarah balked.

"I'm well aware of that Agent Walker. That is why Mr. Bartowski's expertise has been requested for a job in overhauling several companies' networks and bring them up to date. It should take him a couple of months to complete." She told them smugly. Chuck looked hesitant for a moment.

"And what will I really be doing General?" He asked her cautiously, asking the question that was on everybody's mind.

"You will be in the room you are now, secure, going over intel that is gathered and providing remote assistance when needed." General Beckman informed him.

Sarah watched his expression as it went from shock to annoyance to finally reluctant acceptance. She was more alarmed that Chuck didn't protest this new development and her senses were kicking up to high gear that something was seriously wrong. Glancing over at Casey, the expression on his face relieved her slightly that she wasn't over reacting; he too seemed concerned, or as concerned as Casey could be, about Chuck.

"Why the sudden change in plans General? Did something happen yesterday at the fair?" Sarah asked her. She was sure it went fine, she was pretty sure that if there was a problem Chuck would have called her right away.

"Calm down agent. Nothing happened. Though in the future I would appreciate if you ran things through me first before giving the asset to run around on his own. Agent Leyan and Coleman brought up a good point that with his job at the Buy More he'll be going to unknown locations at any time. With their lack of information about the Intersect it is hard to determine the proper procedures for his protection; therefore I've solved the problem. He will stay in Castle during work hours and then he will go straight home where he can be monitored."

Sarah didn't like this; she didn't like it at all. The government already encroached on Chuck's life more than any other asset she's ever been assigned, and now with the General's new plan for Chuck while they were on this mission he was going to essentially be under 24 hour watch. The only place he'd have privacy is in the bathroom, and she knew if Casey had his way Chuck wouldn't even have that as the man apparently knew no boundaries.

"General, forgive me, but is that really necessary?" She asked grimly, not taking her eyes off Chuck.

"I believe it is Agent Walker. You will start today Mr. Bartowski. You will go to the Buy More and you will be informed there by your boss of the assignment. Proceed to the location you are given and you'll be brought back to Castle a back way." She said. "With that out of the way let's get down to business."

With that the subject was dropped but Sarah couldn't help gaping still as she watch Chuck sit down finally at the table in front of him. He picked up an iPad that sat in front of him and turn it on, staring at it instead of the camera. Sarah's heart beat wilding and urged him through her mind to look at her, to look up but he ignored them all and continue to stare down.

"Nice iPad buddy." Bryce complimented, causing Chuck to finally look up, letting Sarah get a better view of the bruise, imagining what in his room put make that sort of design. At least it didn't look like a fist, though Chuck was not one to get into fights, even if he really needed to, like on missions.

"Thanks Bryce, it came in this morning. Apparently this is what I'm to use." He explained

"It's encrypted with the highest security available and its linked on a network that is directly to me only so it stays that way. It's also protected by voice and iris recognition as well as several passwords. With the amount of intel he'll be viewing I don't wish for any information getting out to the other two agents." Beckman explained further.

"I don't understand General. You leave Chuck in their care but you're extra secure about the data he'll be viewing? Wouldn't it have just been safer to bring him with us?" Sarah questioned, trying to hide her impatience. Apparently Beckman was at the end of hers.

"Agent Walker, they are in charge of him physically, they don't know anything about what he does or who he is and that is how I prefer to keep it. I will not explain myself or my reasons to you."

"Basically they are just babysitters Walker." Casey muttered beside her. Sarah sat back in her seat, holding her pen so tightly it almost snapped in half.

"Would that make you two glorified babysitters then since you get to know the details?" Bryce questioned with a smirk that was quickly wiped off his face at the glare from Casey and the kick from under the desk from Sarah.

"That's enough of that. Please present what you have now." Beckman scowled at them, cutting off any further remark. Casey pressed some keys and the screens minimized again bringing up the intel they had gathered. Sarah glanced at the images momentarily before being drawn to Chuck as his eyes glazed and moved back and forth in a flash.

"So far we don't have much. We followed this man, Kevin Dryers last night on a date but he didn't do anything suspicious or lead us anywhere. We have another lead but we haven't a name yet." With another button the image of Kevin lowered and another photo popped up. They all waited a moment, seeing Chuck flash on the man as well.

"Mr. Bartowski?" The General inquired. Chuck blinked a few times before looking at the screen and shook his head a little as if shaking out cobwebs.

"The guy's name is Santiago Mendez. He's a low level thug for a minor drug cartel in Columbia. He has no ties to anything in America but he had been arrested twice for possession."

"That's it" Bryce asked incredulously. Sarah agreed, there has to be more to it if he were in the Intersect.

"He's also connected to Michael Saez. He's a CIA agent that was deep undercover in Columbia at the same time that Mendez was. He went in as a buyer to try and get the contacts for some larger distributors. Unfortunately he didn't get very far as someone tipped off the head guy and he was rooted out. Luckily he got out in time and was able to get back to the states but that's about it." Chuck told them, typing something up on his iPad. "And according to this, which is super cool General thanks for giving me access, Michael Saez is currently in Algeria on a mission that is classified and his last check in three days ago was made on schedule."

"So we have a thug with ties to the CIA who has no connection that we see to Dryer or to Fulcrum." Bryce said despondently.

"Well this is turning out well." Casey grumbled. Sarah couldn't answer, she was hoping that they could get a lead and get the case moving so Casey and her could get home.

"Follow Dreyer further and find out who his associates are. There could be somebody else there that we just haven't seen yet. We need to find this cell and we need to find it soon. Keep me updated. Mr. Bartowski, the reports will be on the network by the time you get back." With her normal abruptness she closed the connection, leaving no room for comment.

The three agents and one asset sat in silence for several moments, nobody quite sure what to say or do next. The Agents had work to do, plenty but they all had questions for Chuck, inquiries into what really happened as he appeared to be hiding things.

"Well guys I guess I'll-"

"Can you two give us a moment please." Sarah said, not asking. Casey stood up right away from his chair, giving Sarah a look that she interpreted as he wanted to know what really happened. Bryce however sat there a moment longer looking between Sarah and Chuck and debating if he really wanted to leave them alone. But the look Sarah gave him left little room for him to argue and he got up and left as well.

Once they were in the other room and she heard the tinkering and arguing again about how to properly clean a gun she turned back to the screen to Chuck, who was currently staring at the iPad again. She appraised him for several moments, taking in his full appearance. Aside from the bruise on the side of his face and the fact that he looked tired, probably from coming in late last night he looked alright.

"You look good Sarah." Chuck started, breaking the silence and looking up once again. The small gesture brought a sad smile to her face. She missed him so much.

"I'd say the same of you Chuck but that bruise looks kind of painful." She commented and he looked down for a moment before returning his gaze on her.

"It's nothing really Sarah. Don't worry." He bleakly, obviously knowing the words would have no effect on her.

"I have to worry about you Chuck." She told him pointedly, but Chuck just shrugged.

"Don't be, the Intersect is taken care of. Its fine." Anger flared threw her at that comment and she ground her jaw together to stop the angry words that were begging to get out, knowing that it would do no good and she didn't want to fight with him.

"You know very well Chuck that is not what I was talking about. What happened?" She asked him pointedly, not understanding why he would say such a thing.

"I know, I'm sorry. It's nothing. I swear." He said. Sarah wanted to believe him, but there was something that wasn't right but she didn't know what it would be. "I miss you Sarah." He told her honestly and all the anger melted away. It always amazed her how he could do that, calm her with such simple words. No one else has ever been able to do that, not even her father or mother.

"I miss you too Chuck. More than you know." She confessed. "I wish I was there with you."

"I wish you were too but I don't want you to worry about me ok?" He told her earnestly and she shook her head.

"Chuck, I'll always worry about you. And not because it's my job." He gave her a grin and she felt her body flutter. She always loved his smiles, his real ones not the fake ones. They were always bright and warm and so genuine. She wished he would do it more, but she knew he would say the same thing about her, in fact he already had. Frequently. Enough times that he seemed to make it his own personal mission to make her smile as much as possible, and just the memory of some of the ways he went about his task caused her own smile to spread through her lips.

"You would tell me if there was something wrong wouldn't you?" She asked him, watching him carefully for any falsehood. She watched him pause and blink a few times, already giving a tell that he wouldn't tell her at least right away.

"Of course Sarah. If something was seriously wrong, you'd be the first to know. I swear nothing is going on." He repeated, still as earnest as before. "I just want you to focus on your mission and come back to me as soon as possible. I'll stay here in Castle and be a good little asset."

A small laugh escaped Sarah at the comment and she wondered idly if he knew how to be a 'good little asset'. He had a nasty habit of always trying to help and getting in dangerous situations when he should just stay in the car. There had been several times when he had luckily saved them, saved the day and while she was always grateful to him for it she sometimes wondered if she would need saving so much if he would just do what he was told.

But if he did he wouldn't be the Chuck that she fell in a love with. The man with a heart so big and kind that it sometimes overshadowed, ok always overshadowed common sense. The person who would quite literally give the shirt off his back if it would help someone, even a stranger, doubly so for friends.

"Yeah, I doubt that is possible Chuck, but I'll appreciate if you at least try." She teased.

She and Chuck talked for a couple more moments before they had reluctantly said goodbye to each other. She promised to call him later on that night before disconnecting the video and sitting in silence for several moments, letting her mind wheel over everything. She could tell that something was wrong but she didn't have a clue what it was and hoped that if it got to serious that he would reach out to her about it.

"So what's the verdict" Casey's voice startled her from behind as he entered the room again. He came in and sat back in the chair he had vacated not too long ago, sitting back with his legs stretched out and his hands on his head.

"He says it's nothing. That he tripped." She said. Casey smirked and gave a meaningful look at her. "Yeah I know." She said getting the message loud and clear.

"Why would he hide it?" Casey asked. Sarah shrugged slightly and sighed.

"You know him, he doesn't want to stress me out. He wants me focused on this and not on him."

"Do you think we have something to worry about?" Sarah thought about that. The answer was yes, always yes but she had yet to determine if it was the Agent in her or Sarah saying that.

"I don't think so yet." She told him, though deep down, or not so deep down she was worried already. Casey nodded his head and pushed up out of the chair, giving a pat on her shoulder.

"I'll keep an eye on the surveillance." He commented as he left the room.

Sarah let out a puff of air and sat back in her chair, leaning her head back against the top to stare at the ceiling above. She closed her eyes and just focused on breathing, on centering herself. But no matter what she told herself or how much breathing she did she couldn't get her mind away from Chuck and the bruise. She could tell easily that he was hiding something from her; he wasn't that great a liar though he believed he was getting better. But she was an expert at detecting falsehoods and what he was telling her was a big one. She just hoped whatever he was hiding it wasn't too serious.

A/N: Food poisoning is better. I need coffee. Did anyone else get really excited about the X-Files miniseries? I totally screamed really loud. I'm glad no one was around. In case you didn't know, I'm a HUGE HUGE HUGE X-Files fan. (got the 2 tats to prove it.)

Reviews are now at the bottom as I get tons now and I'm enjoying responding to them and leaving messeges.

** Nerdtastic78:** Who knows where Beckman stands. Though considering how my fics go you can probably presume she's not evil. I like Beckman.

** knightrid3r:** He really is a very likable character and he is so diverse that I find it so easy to picture him in so many roles which makes him so easy to write. He can be strong and weak and everything in between.

**Wade1978:** I feel Chuck doesn't get to play much anymore. I thought it would be fun. And you know, Morgan. hehe.

**Nomadic Nerd:** 1) Yeah but was Laslow really a scumbag or was he just a product of what the government made him? I mean think of his story, he was smarter than everybody and his parents not knowing what to do basically sold him to the government. Its already been proven that the smarter you are the more mental issues you have and knowing the government they probably locked him up in that bunker alone to build stuff for him his entire life and he just went crazy. I find Laslow like Shaw more of a tragic villian then actually evil. 2) Nooooo. According to canon Jill denied sleeping with Bryce. That doesn't make it true. She is an enemy agent and i'm sure can mess with a polygraph. We never did hear it from Bryce and to be honest, after everything I would be more inclined to believe Bryce over Jill on this matter. 3) Yeah things are going to get worse for Chuck. Much Much Worse. Man i'm really sadistic towards this poor guy. I'm a jerk!

**wilf21:** It's coming sometime. Don't you worry. There is already a bullet with their names on it.

**Neale:** I did not. I actually modeled her after one of my co-workers who needs a nice smack.

**sevenrez:** Duh cause if they went they woulda had fun and I'd have no plot to mess with. I gotta make them angry boring people. Remember, common sense does not have a place in ameture fanfiction.

** Shutupnkissme313:** Well, nothing yet in this chapter but don't worry. They wont sit idle for long.

**Marc Vun Kannon:** I hate Bryce with a passion but I never ever felt that his actions towards Chuck were ever malicious. I see it a lot in Sarah how she has trouble functioning in normal society due to her childhood and training and i see Bryce in the same light. I really do feel he geinuinly cares for Chuck. (Which makes for some really awesome slashfics if a good writer would hop on)

**RABCentralIL:** Thank you! i thought it was over the top too. I find it so hard to make the violence sound natural. Though to be honest should violence be natural? Something to ponder i think.

**phathead01:** Exactly, he could have ended up with these bozos.

**phnxgrl:** Thank you for reviewing!

**idadri:** Well i wouldn't say imprisioned.

**Marissab1996:** Thank you for reviewing! :)

** bcpiano:** She is one smart cookie. She didn't become a General for nothing!

**doc2or: ** Aw, don't worry. I knew you were lurking around reading :-p. I think a curse was placed on me as well to be honest. The only tip I can give is that American Pharoh is looking like a good contender for the Kentucky Derby. I'd box him and Carpe Diem in an exacta.


	8. Chapter 8

Thank you to Charahkids for being my beta. I totally adore them! and will always tell them that! They have a fabulous eye that I dont.

Individual review thanks is at the bottom. Thank you all for reading and even extra thanks for reviewing.

Chapter 8

Chuck was tired. He was exhausted. He hadn't slept in what felt like weeks, unable to get his mind to settle down enough to allow him to rest. He felt his whole life was out of control and it took all his will power not to just start screaming and never stop. He knew that his lack of sleep and his constant fear and paranoia was starting to affect him in severely negative ways, mostly in the ways that he can't hide it any longer from those around him.

He could hardly believe that it had only been just over two weeks since Sarah and Casey had left to go on this mission with Bryce. It felt longer, more like a lifetime ago they had been there, and it didn't seem like they were going to be coming back any time soon. This mission had been nothing but dead ends since the beginning. They had gotten a few leads here and there but the flashes of the people had led to nowhere. It was completely random people who weren't really connected to anything and it was both baffling and frustrating the hell out of all those involved.

Chuck turned the iPad off and set it down, placing his face in his hands as he closed his eyes and enjoyed the darkness it brought to him. His head hurt, a lot. He could feel the migraine that he's had for the past few days growing exponentially as he let his mind go blank for a few seconds. He'd never flashed so much at a time since he'd acquired the Intersect but now it was practically non stop flashing for eight hours straight, locked inside the secure room. His mind felt like it was heating up too hot, like a computer that's processing too much and his head ached everyday now with headaches and migraines, causing nausea and sensitivity to light and sound.

He hoped that all the intel he had been passing on to the general from all the flashes he'd been doing had been helping as much as possible. He didn't mind the task in general, understanding the importance of the intel and how it could very well save a lot of lives, both civilian and agents alike. But the pain was becoming too intense for him, to the point where he was about to ask the General for a reprieve for a few days.

His watch beeped, causing his achy head to increase as his heart jumped into his throat. Removing his hands from his face he looked down annoyed at his watch and shut it off, sighing in relief at seeing that it was time to go home now.

About damn time.

He sat there a few more moments before standing up and turning the iPad back on and entering the shutdown protocols to make sure it's secure. He then walked to the head of the room and entered the passcode into the safe box that was there and placed it inside; making sure everything was locked up properly before finally letting out a sigh of relief and going to exit the room.

He stood by the door a moment, bracing himself for what was on the other side. The other Agents. They were the last obstacle between him and his bed, the one place he wanted to be more than anything at the moment.

They had become nearly unbearable in their treatment of him, which he didn't think was possible. He was under practically 24 hour surveillance yet somehow the Agents somehow found the times and ways to get to him. Weather it was verbally or physically it didn't matter; they liked making his life hell. His ankle twinge as a reminder as he thought about them of their latest round just yesterday.

He had finally been able to get away from Castle and taken home, carpooling yet again with Agent Coleman. He hated it and wishes he could just take the Nerd Herder but the Agents vetoed that, saying it was more secure for them to transport them to whatever location he needed to go to, not wanting him to accidently run off. Not that he's ever done that before.

In any case riding with them had become stressful and an exercise in fear and patience in itself. With Agent Leyan he had a tendency to drive crazier than Sarah ever would. He seemed to take delight in knowing that it scared the crap out of Chuck, pulling daring moves that was way beyond appropriate for a business district. He had a fondness of slamming the breaks suddenly and causing Chuck to constantly smash his head on the side or top, being too tall for the Agents car. His knees constantly ached from smashing into the dashboard so often. But he had long already figured out not to make any vocal complaint about it because Leyan would just go faster than next time, mock him for being a wimp, back hand him or punch him hard for daring to talk back to him.

It was times like this that he understood Lazlow, the asset who was the Q of the CIA before he went insane and escaped, building a bomb to blow up thousands of innocent people. He wondered if this is what he had to deal with. If after being sold to the government by his parents if he was then abused, beaten and degraded into submission into finally he cracked and became the guy that Chuck had met.

But no matter how bad it was driving with Leyan, he preferred it to drying with Coleman. She on the other hand was a little more handsy. She did the normal, slapping and hitting, degrading him, things that he had learned over the past few weeks to ignore but when she reaches her hands over to his lap, pressing in on a part of him that was a no fly zone, it takes uncomfortable to a whole new level. He was pretty sure molesting the asset was not in the manual for handling.

The first time it happened she had grabbed her wrist from his lap roughly and tossed it over to her side where her hand smacked loudly and painfully into the wheel. She screeched in pain as she balled her hand up into a fist and swung her short arm as fast and hard as possible in the restricted space and punched him in the chest. He couldn't breathe for several moments after that, pretty sure that he had turned blue a bit from lack of oxygen. She was angry at him and pulled the car over proceeding to show him how much show as she rained down her fists upon him.

He had curled his lanky form in a tight fetal position, raising his hands over to cover his head and neck and allowed her to do as she willed. He couldn't hit a girl, even if she deserved it, even if he needed to get her to stop what she was doing. He would never, could never ever do that. So he just sat there, hunched against the door of the car and allowed her to tire herself out.

After finally getting home that night he had entered the Morgan door, and entered that way, not wanting to deal with Ellie who was home for at least another hour before her evening shift started. His body ached and he was having trouble breathing as he tried to keep his emotions under control. But Chuck being chuck couldn't do it for long especially as he heard Ellie exiting the kitchen and walking down the hall, he had jumped into his closet, shutting the door gently as to not alert anyone that he was in there and just sat on the floor with his knees brought up to under his chin.

His phone had rang a few moments earlier and his heart beat quicker at seeing Sarah's smiling face stare up at him. It was the first time ever that he hesitated in answering, not wanting her to hear the distress in his voice. Not wanting to lie to her out right when his emotions were so close to the surface. But he knew if he hadn't answered then she would know something was wrong. She had access to the security feeds in his room and would be able to tell he was hiding in his closet.

"Hey Sarah." He had said into the phone, forcing cheerfulness to sound through. He heard silence on the other side and for a moment he thought he had picked up too late and she had disconnected, but after another beat her soft voice filtered through his phone calming his harried nerves.

"Chuck, why are you in the closet?" She asked him out right, not bothering to work up to the question. That was his Sarah. He had stuttered and stumbled for a moment before blurting out a logical answer of wanting to be alone for a little bit.

She seemed to buy it. It made sense. He was always on a feed, always being watched. She could understand him wanting some peace, even if it was in the closet.

He had asked her about her day, and about the case, not even flinching as the pain in his head throbbed out of control as he flashed when she mentioned certain things that were in the Intersect. He had just bit his lip and kept quiet, something he was learning more and more how to do.

It was also the first time he was glad to end the call with her. She had to go, take care of something with Bryce and he had quickly said his goodbyes to her and disconnected the call, remaining seated in the closet for several more hours, even falling asleep sitting up in his exhausted frame before finally staggering out and collapsing on his bed.

That had been a week and a half ago, which had nothing to do with his throbbing ankle at the moment. No that was caused yesterday as he was coming down into Castle and Leyan, who followed closely behind him and bumped into him causing him to miss the last couple steps and he fell, twisting his ankle and calling out in pain. He had looked up to see Leyan with a cheeky expression and a shrug.

Nothing had yet happened today aside from normal pinching and scornful words but it was only 6PM and anything could yet happen.

Taking one last second of peace to himself Chuck closed his eyes and braced himself for what was to come and opened the door. He opened the door to the secure room that Beckman had designated for his use during this time and looked around, grateful to see that neither of his current handlers were out there waiting for him, but at the same time, alarmed at the quiet not quite sure what they could be up to or planning.

Closing the door silently behind him and pressing the lock code to keep it safe he began walking down the corridor quietly, looking around and making sure they were not lurking around. It was another thing they seemed to do a lot, jump out at him and scare the crap out of him. He swore it was worse than elementary school sometimes the way they behaved, but they were nowhere to be found at the moment.

Walking further down the corridor he checked the kitchen area and peeked inside the armory and didn't see anything. For a second he thought that they may have left him there, and though he was concerned with how he would get home, it was also a bit of relief that he may get some kind of quiet time alone away from the stress.

With that happy thought in mind he turned the corner and walked into the main conference room where Team Bartowski normally had their briefing with Beckman or whatever else they did in the spy business. He stopped t the entrance, seeing both Leyan and Coleman siting at consoles, staring intently at the screens with whatever they were doing.

Chuck took a moment to check it out over their shoulders. It looked like reports of recent CIA and NSA activities as well as personal files. HE couldn't figure out what they would be doing that would cause then to need to view them but he really didn't want to know. Stepping further into the room he meant to just bypass them without disturbing them and exit out the door, making a clean get away but Chuck's gangly body had other ideas as he stepped on his sprained ankle and fell into a table on the side knocking over all the files and items that were littering there.

He did see, couldn't see as he stared at the ground but he could feel both Agents eyes on him as they turned around abruptly from their seats to see what caused the disturbance. He could feel their angry annoyed gazes land on him and recognizing he was the cause of it.

"What the hell do you think you're doing Bartowski?" Leyan asked standing up from his chair and coming to tower over Chuck. Chuck for the most part didn't make any sudden movements, knowing what would be coming next. He slowly got up on his hands and knees and began reaching around him and gathering up all the things that had fallen to the floor, not looking up at the man in front of him.

Chuck felt himself choke for a second as Leyan reached down and grabbed the back of his shirt, tightening it around his neck as he brought Chuck up to his feet. Leyan glared at Chuck as if he were nothing more but mud on his shoe as he released his hold on Chuck and backed up a few steps.

"I asked you a question Bartowski." He repeated. Chuck stuttered a few times, twitching his shirt in his hands, a nervous tick he had mostly growing up but had grown out of, only to have it return since Sarah left.

"I was just, its past 6." He said lamely. "You two looked busy and I was just going to…" He gestured to the stairs and that he was trying to just leave.

"You leave when we tell you to leave Bartowski. We aren't done here." Chuck nodded his understanding, wanting to be agreeable.

"Is there, well, something that I can help you with? I saw you were looking at-" He stopped abruptly as Leyan stepped forward directly into his space and right in front of his face causing Chuck to go slightly cross eyed to see him.

"What we are doing is not your concern Bartowski. You don't have the clearance to know anything. I suggest you mind your own business." He growled in a husky sound that would make Casey proud. Chuck nodded his head quickly, eyes wide in fear. They stayed that way for several more moments, causing Chuck to sweat a bit more and his heart beat a bit more wildly.

Finally Leyan stepped back and turned back towards the chair he was in and made a grand gesture of sitting in front of the computer ignoring him. Chuck wasn't sure what to do next, what to say, where to go so he stood there frozen until someone spoke to him.

"Clean up that mess Bartowski. Coleman, take care of him." Leyan stated, not turning around again. Chuck immediately jumped into action and began cleaning up the mess he had made, not bothering to look up as he set about it.

The ride home was surprisingly silent, which just made him even more anxious. Coleman hadn't said a single word to him since they walked up the stairs and out the building, entering her car. He sat in the passenger seat with his arms and shoulders quenched as close together as possible in an attempt to make himself small as he stared out the window, not daring to let his mind wonder. That he learned was dangerous. You can't prepare yourself if you do that.

But nothing came. No hits, nor pinches. She didn't try to molest him again which caused him even more distress then the other things. Instead they rode the whole five miles home in silence until they parked in front of the complex he called home.

As soon as the car stopped Chuck immediately unbuckled his seat belt and tried to bolt out of the car only to be stopped by Coleman's hand wrapped tightly around his wrist holding him there. He closed his eyes tightly for a moment before turning his head to look at her.

She looked almost sad. It caused him to pause for a moment and his mind to wheel. What would cause that expression to cross her face? The face that was normally smirking in a flirting way or glaring angrily at him. He wanted to ask but he was still too afraid too.

"Chuck, do you think you would be able to help?" She asked him, her voice quiet and calm. Quite different from what he was used to from her. He shrugged his shoulders.

"It depends on what it is you're doing. But you heard Leyan." He told her hiding the shudder he felt course through him at the mention of Leyan. He didn't know why he felt Leyan was the worst of the two, but something about him just made Chuck hate him more than Coleman.

"You don't worry about him right yet. I'll take care of it. You must be a very important asset Chuck." She told him. He didn't respond, not wanting to toot his own horn or put him in a position where he could be used in the wrong way.

Coleman released his wrist and he brought it up to his chest and rubbed it with his other hand. It felt tender and he knew there would be yet another bruise that he'll have to explain or hide. He didn't know how she did it but tiny or not she was really strong.

"I'll talk to Agent Leyan and see if we can get you to help. We having something important we are working on and we've been having trouble achieving our goal. Maybe what we need is you." She said, seemingly more to herself then to him. He just nodded his head, not sure what to say. They sat there for a few minutes, letting the silence stretch out between them before Chuck got out of the car and muttered a good night and walked towards his apartment.

Heading into the courtyard he could see the lights were on in the living room and could see Ellie and Awesome flitting around the kitchen and dining room making dinner. He noted they set a place out for him like they did every night they cooked but yet again he was considering using the Morgan Door instead of going in.

He was tired, exhausted and he just wanted to sleep, but he missed his sister so much. He hadn't seen her much since Sarah had left, preferring to avoid her instead of having to come up with explanations. He wasn't sure how she did it but somehow Ellie had a sixth sense for anything that could possibly be wrong with Chuck and honed in on it, pecking until she got what she wanted.

A good example was that first week with the bruise on his face, that though healed still felt slightly tender. He had come home after the briefing with Beckman and decided he couldn't hide any more from Ellie and she immediately fretted, going postal and wanting names of who did this. He had no doubt in his mind that she would or could take out anyone who would dare hurt her little brother. But after a very tiring time of calming her down, he convinced her, or at least he believed he convinced her that it was an accident and he was fine.

Now however two weeks later, multiple bruises all over his body he wasn't quite sure how to talk his way out of this one so he just avoided her all together. But with Sarah gone and him being confined to either Castle or his room he had begun getting very lonely. Even with the almost nightly calls from Sarah, and the occasional visit from Morgan.

He knew he could end all this torment quickly, or at least he thought he could. He knew if he just opened his mouth, and told Sarah about what was going on there, what they were doing to him, that she and maybe Casey would be on the first flight home to save him.

But the unknown consequences outweighed the benefits. Yes he knew that it would stop, that he'd be safe again, away from their violence and their degrading words and attitudes but in the meantime Beckman could stick him in a bunker presently. He could be reassigned other Agents that are far worse. They could take Sarah away from him.

No he decided to keep his mouth shut and just help her as much as possible to get her mission completed and bring her home to him.

"Chuck man, are you coming in?" Devon's voice startled him, causing him to jump from where he had ended up sitting on the edge of the fountain. He looked up at Devon, eyes wide like a deer in headlights and stared for a few moments. "Bro, you don't look so good." He commented opening the door wider.

Chuck stared at the door for another moment, debating if it was too late to escape or not, but hearing Ellie's voice inside, it drew him to the door in a heartbeat, not caring what he looked like or was feeling. He needed his sister.

Walking into the door he saw her sitting on the couch with the remote in her hand changing the channels, he paused just inside the doorway as Devon closed it behind him and Ellie looked up to greet him but her smile froze and fell at ragged appearance. He knew how he looked. All bones with saggy clothes that no longer fit him from his lack of appetite lately and the dark bags under his eyes from always being tired but never really sleeping.

"Chuck, what…" Ellie started but Chuck didn't let her finish as he rushed towards her on the couch and wrapped his arms tightly around waist and burring his face into her shoulder. He felt his breath hitch in his chest as the emotions raged through him and began bubbling up and over him as he felt Ellie wrap her own arms around him and rest her chin on the top of his head.

He was so focused on his breathing, inhaling the familiar scent of his sister as he held her tight, remembering all the times in the past they were in this position of her comforting him, mothering him because his own mother had abandoned them, leaving Ellie to the task at such a young age. He heard footsteps walk away from them and a click from the kitchen, obviously Devon taking care of dinner so it wouldn't burn while his girlfriend's brother had another melt down. It was something he used to be self-conscious about but over the years, he comes to get that Devon understood. He knew Chuck and Ellie had a special bond because of their childhoods and for that Chuck was grateful for him. He adored Devon Woodcomb and everything he represented for his sister.

"It's ok Chuck." Ellie whispered placing a gentle kiss on his crown as she held him closer and he curled up against her. "Whatever you need. Everything will be alright" She soothed. Chuck burrowed further against her holding her tight, afraid of letting go as the tears began to bubble and fall out of his eyes.

"I just need someone to be nice to me for a while." He said, and finally the tears came.

Chuck wasn't sure how long they had sat there like that, how long he had sobbed in his sisters arms. He knew she was concerned about him but he couldn't bring himself to care at the moment. He needed comfort and love and it was something that she could provide to him for the moment.

He didn't remember how he got into bed, how he got down to his boxers and over shirt but he woke up in bed the next morning to the sun shining through his slightly opened blinds. He felt exhausted still, though he was pretty sure he slept through the night for the first time in weeks. Sighing loudly he turned over to his other side and curled up as small as his long form would allow him. He wanted to stay there in the warmth of his bed and not deal with the real world, but he knew he only had about an hour before Coleman and Leyan would be furious at him if he weren't outside by the fountain waiting to carpool. He really missed his Herder.

His phone vibrated on the night stand next to his clock startling him from dozing back to sleep. He blinked up at it and grabbed it from the table, flipping it to see who was calling. His frown changed to a huge smile at seeing Sarah there and his heart felt slightly lighter.

"Hey." He said quietly answering the phone.

"Hey yourself." She replied lightly.

"How are you? I'm sorry I missed our call last night." He apologized, rolling to end up on his back and staring at the ceiling, not caring that the cameras could pick up on his happy smile.

"It's ok Chuck, I didn't call. I uh, noticed you on the security feed and thought you needed sleep." She said getting right to the point. Chuck's smile faltered as it fell and he was silent as he heard her breath on the other end. "What happened Chuck?" She asked sounding tired. Guilt immediately ran through him for this.

"Nothing happened Sarah." He lied. "I just, felt overwhelmed yesterday and needed some comfort." He could tell from the silence that she wasn't really buying it. But he didn't want to fight with her. He just wanted to hear her voice.

"Tell me how you are. How are Casey and Bryce handling each other? "He asked her changing the subject. He could imagine her in her hotel or wherever she was biting her lip and debating to go with it or continue her interrogation.

"They're fighting like an old married couple that should have divorced before they got married." She told him honestly causing him to bark out a laugh.

"Yep, that sounds like them."

"I'm about ready to lock them in a closet. You should hear them it's so horrible."

"That could be either really fun or really bad. Bryce wouldn't be coming back either way if Casey had his say."

"Oh can you imagine how he would be if he could kill Bryce again. I think he'd dismember him just to make sure he was really gone this time."

They shared a laugh as the image crossed each of their minds. Though they knew in reality it wouldn't be as silly and they'd probably be horrified and disgusted it was still a funny thing to think about. It felt good to laugh, he loved it but it just made him ache more for her.

"Chuck, is something happening there?" She asked him serious again and he frowned once more. He was silent for a few moments while his mind deliberated.

"Everything's fine Sarah." He told her finally, but the sigh on the other end told him that she didn't believe him at all.

"Chuck, don't lie to me please. Something is wrong." She stated firmly, but he shook his head, not that she could see it unless she was watching his bedroom feed.

"Don't worry about me. Just worry about being safe alright?" He pleaded.

"Chuck, Morgan said…" She stopped abruptly and he sat up in bed and narrowed his eyes curious.

"Morgan said what?" He asked her when she didn't continue.

"It's nothing Chuck. I'm just really worried about you."

"You've been talking to Morgan? Behind my back? Don't you trust me?" He asked her, his voice rising slightly. He told himself to calm down but he was so out of control of himself or anything else at the moment that he was finding it difficult to keep his cool.

"Of course I trust you Chuck but something is going on and you're not telling me." She told him sullenly. "I can see you Chuck. I see you tired, and in pain, unhappy. And then on the phone, I just, is this because I'm not there? I'm coming back Chuck."

Chuck wasn't sure what to say. He didn't know at all. He was speechless and his mind totally stopped thinking. He wasn't mad at her, how could he be? She cared about him, and worried about him. And though he has pointed out that it's her job too he knew that it was more than that but everything was just building up again and he was once again feeling overwhelmed.

"Maybe you need a couple days off Chuck, let me talk to Beckman and-"

"No." He said so softly he wasn't sure she heard him so he repeated it a little louder. "No, thank you Sarah. I'm fine. I just, need some sleep. Some peace of mind."

Sarah was silent on the other line and if he didn't know any better he'd say she hung up but after a few moments of silence he heard her sigh into the phone as she apparently acquiescence. He shook his head again, clearing the cobwebs that lay in there and looked at the clock again, showing him he only had 15 minutes to get showered and ready to go.

"Look Sarah, I'm fine. But I got to go, I have to get to work ok? I love you." He told her and waited for her reply, not expecting her to return the sentiment.

"Alright Chuck, but…" She paused and he pressed the phone closer to his ear to hear her.

"What is it?" He asked her. She sighed again.

"If something serious happens, you have to call me ok? You have to do what I said."

"Sarah I-"

"No, Chuck. I have no idea what is going on out there and its driving me crazy. But I have to know, if its serious, if you get into trouble, whatever. Please take care of yourself." He looked around the room for a second making eye contact with the camera in the corner before looking away.

"I promise Sarah." With that he said his goodbye and disconnected the call, falling on his back again and closing his eyes.

A/N: Some things will be answered and knowledge will be known in the next chapter. However the plot will thicken and things will get worse for Chuck because you know me, I love the man to pieces but i love to make him squirm.

Nothing important is happening in life worth noting. its temp season. Derby in 2 weeks. I've decided to get a bag of starburst for the derby cause i find building things with them quite amusing. I'm thinking I may start a Chuck twitter or facebook dialouge to discuss the show, characters, and fanfic on those two days just to keep me amused. So feel free to sign up for twitter or facebook and friend me if you want to participate in that.

Nerdtastic78: Its coming up! hold your breath! ok don't cause you'll turn blue and then I'm down one reader, but I promise its all coming up and soon.

Wade1978: All shall be revealed soon! And I know, like I LOVE the X-Files. its my fave show of all time and while I would WANT more i totally am ok with the 6. They insulted us enough with S9, but they left so much unanwered and they need to just clean it up. I would be satisfied with that.

phnxgr: Well Sarah would be a bad spy if she didn't suspect Chuck was lying about something when the evidence clearly points to something. :)

Neale:Bunker boy act will not last long. i don't think Chuck was made to florish in the underground lair of cement. Poor guy.

wilf21: It is hard to hide things from two people who have spent their lives being spies and not believing anything they see. But being on the other side of the country makes it difficult to get any real answeres from our Chuckles..

sevenrez: haha i COULD have him just tell them right out and then it'll be like a one shot. But no...gotta stretch it out to unrealistic proportions that would propbably not happen in real life but makes for good fanfic in general. Would you believe me if I tell ya it will actually get WORSE for chuck in the coming chapters? muahaha. i'm so evil.

Shutupnkissme313: I suspect Beckman always knew about them so thats why they have so much leeway. Because it keeps the team together and they do fabu work. I don't think its really being more proficient as it is just looking at my options. I could you know, like, work. Cause thats where i'm actually at when I write. Or I could write fanfic. I choose the latter.


	9. Chapter 9

Another Chapter. Thank you to charahkids for fixing the errors. You really help me sound smart!

Thank you to all who have read, and those who have reviewed. (Personal thanks to each reviewee at the end.)

Chapter 9

"Damn it." Sarah swore as she tossed her phone down on the table harder than was strictly necessary. She looked up at the screens that covered one side of the room she was in at their base of operations. She watched as Chuck took a few more moments after they disconnected to gather himself before starting to get up and going for his day.

She grimaced at seeing how his white undershirt hung loosely on his body, practically drowning him in the fabric as he stood up. She didn't know what to do at that moment. She had been watching, like a hawk for the past two weeks, always checking the feeds and checking on him but she couldn't figure out what was going on. He seemed to be falling apart and she couldn't figure out why.

His last conversation with Morgan didn't bode well for her either. He had told her that Chuck was lethargic and withdrawn. That half the time he would get one or two word answers from him and he hadn't wanted to spend much time, if any with Morgan in about a week. She could tell by the sound of his voice that Morgan was taking that part very hard and she really wish she could say or do something to help him.

But Chuck just wouldn't open up to her. Wouldn't tell her what was wrong.

"You call that a plan? You're going to get us killed Larkin. No wonder you were so easy to shoot." Casey's voice rang out from the other room breaking into her thoughts. She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose as she waited for Bryce's reply.

"I may be easy to shoot but at least you're a bad shot apparently. I'm still here after all." Bryce shot back and Sarah had to resist groaning, knowing that the fact he was alive was a sore spot in Casey's book.

"That can be re-arranged at any time Larkin."

"That's enough!" Sarah shouted dropping her hand. She immediately turned away from the bank of computers and walked into the other room to see her two partners on other sides of the table pouring over maps and data. "Can't you two stop fighting for five minutes and work?" She barked at them.

Neither said a word as they stared at her alarmed. She knew what they were thinking. She had gone crazy. Sarah Walker was deadly on a good day but she never shouted or yelled, never lost her temper. At least not with her partners, and she hated that Chuck could make her act and feel this way. Taking a moment to count to ten she finally let out a huff and faced them, arms crossed over her chest.

"Look, I'm sorry. I'm just frustrated." She admitted, hated to admit but she knew the others felt the same as well.

"We'll figure something out Sarah." Bryce assured her, but she didn't feel assured. It just made her feel even more depressed because she knew it was a lie.

They had nothing, there was nothing. They only had one lead, Kevin Dreyer and he was a complete dead end. Sarah believed they were chasing an imaginary terror cell at the rate they were going. Nothing matched up. They had found several Fulcrum Agents but none of them were connected in any way. They all had associates in various intelligence Agencies but they couldn't connect them to each other or to any cell activity.

"No we won't." Sarah said despondent and covered her eyes with her hands, blocking out the concerned look from Bryce and, whatever passes as a concerned look from Casey. They all stood in silence for several moments until she dropped her hands to her side and looked down at the table where they had maps of the city and dots where they located Fulcrum agents.

"There has to be something we missed. There has to be something here other than a series of unrelated events." She pressured looking closer at the map. Nothing came to mind, nothing jumped out at her and she thought about sending a read out to Chuck and see if he could see some kind of pattern.

But the thought of Chuck once again caused the tension in her body to intensify and cause her heart to ache replaying the images of last night through her head again. Seeing his long form curled up around his smaller sister like a child as he held on tight to her and sobbed whatever sorrows he had into her shoulder and neck.

There had to be more than what she could see going on, she just didn't know what it was.

"Walker." Casey's voice broke through her thoughts and she looked up from where she was staring at the map to him. His eyes had softened and he did look concerned, and if she were honest it slightly freaked her out a bit.

"I just don't know where to go from here." She admitted.

"I know Walker. And neither do we." Casey admitted as well, glancing at Bryce from across the table. "In fact, I'm starting to think that this whole thing was a ruse." Bryce quirked his brow up.

"To what end? What would having us run around chasing a fulcrum cell accomplish for them?" Bryce argued, sitting heavily in the chair behind him. Sarah wanted to know too, her mind already giving her the answer but she didn't want to accept it right away, at least without someone else voicing it first.

"Think about it Walker. What is the one thing that Fulcrum wants and would do just about anything to get their hands on." Casey asked her redundantly. But she answered anyways.

"Bryce. They want Bryce because they think he has-"

"The Intersect. Exactly." Casey finished sitting in his own chair and began piling up the files that littered the table.

"But why bring us here? Why this huge rouge?" She asked confused. "Bryce is here, we are here. Why not just take him?"

"Because they must believe that I really don't have the Intersect." Bryce answered eyes going wide as the realization hit him. "Chuck!"

"No Larkin. If they thought Chuck was the Intersect they would have taken him already. No I think they know where they can get information about it though." Casey interrupted him with a scowl.

"But it's no secret our connection to Bryce. This means they must think we had information someplace. "Sarah's heart pounded wildly as her mind connected the dots.

They were on a fool's mission. There was nothing here, there was no cell. Fulcrum wanted Sarah and Casey out of the way so they could investigate the area where they had been the past two years for any clues as to where Bryce or the Intersect was. Did they know about Chuck? About Castle?

"We have to alert the General." She said briskly heading into the other room to do just that only to stop short at seeing the General face already on the main screen in the middle.

"No need for that Agent Walker, I'm already here." She said in her typical fashion. Casey and Bryce immediately followed her into the room, stopping abruptly behind her causing her to reach out to the chair in front of her so she wouldn't fall. She glared at Bryce for a second over her shoulder before turning back to the screen.

"General, what can we do for you." Casey said coming to the front at attention, always the solider. The General acknowledged his respect and motioned for them all to take a seat, which Sarah did reluctantly. She wanted to stand and be ready to run out if she needed. To be on her way back to Burbank the second the brief was over.

"I believe it's time to inform you fully of what is going on here." She started but Bryce raised his finger to interrupt.

"I'm sorry but were you spying on us?" He asked annoyed to which Beckman's brow quirked up in the expectant answer. Of course she was. He stared back and forth between Beckman and his two temporary partners then sat back withdrawing the obvious question.

"As I'm sure you're aware by now the mission you are on is not an actual mission. We just needed to get you two out of the way and allow whoever they were going to send to come in."

"So this whole mission is fake? To get us out of Castle?" Sarah said angrily.

"In essence yes. We knew that Fulcrum would send in an Agent as a replacement to search our systems for any information on the Intersect as any information had is there."

"And Chuck? He is the Intersect. You left him there in the hands of potential Fulcrum Agents" Sarah accused, sitting up further in her chair. Beckman's own brows narrowed not liking the tone in Sarah's voice.

"I assure you Agent Walker, Mr. Bartowski's safety is of course our number one concern." With that her a series of documents show up on the various screens on the wall, all pertaining to Chuck. They looked like official documents and notes of observation as well as surveillance photos of him at the Buy More or Orange Orange. Some were of him with either her or Casey.

"What is this?" Casey asked leaning against the table in front of him. Sarah wanted to know the same thing.

"It appears that the two of you have been under surveillance by Fulcrum for several months. We were able to get ahold of the files that they have on the two of you and of Chuck. According to their files they believe that he is just a high level asset that you two are sent to protect and use when necessary on your missions." General Beckman explained. Though it made sense it didn't lesson Sarah's worry for Chuck.

"So they have no clue that he's the Intersect?" Bryce asked and Beckman shook her head.

"None at all. They believe he's just an asset."

"This is a huge gamble General. How could you just leave Chuck in their hands? What if they found out?" Sarah asked still alarmed. Casey grunted beside her in agreement.

"The Agents they sent were vetted in the highest possible way. If they weren't Fulcrum Agents they would have been perfect for this assignment. I believe Chuck is safe in their hands." She told them, Casey grunting again, this time not in agreement.

Sarah sat back in her chair and bit her bottom lip to contain the words that wanted to spill out. She understood where the General was coming from but with all due respect she disagreed with the way this entire mission was going. Placing Chuck in harm's way, even a little bit was not acceptable. Not just to her because she was his girlfriend but because of Chuck. He was a sweet loyal man whose life was a mess right now because of the Intersect and government involvement in every aspect of his life. He didn't deserve to be treated like this.

"General, if they found out about Bartowski-" Casey started, and Sarah was grateful.

"Yes I know. That is why he is currently confined to the secure room in Castle and then at home. To lesson his exposure to the Agents. Which we may have to consider on a more permanent basis. The intel he has provided the past few weeks have been superb."

"With all due respect General have you seen him? The confinement is taking a severe toll on him." Bryce said grimly.

That was putting it mildly. They had watched him none stop for two weeks as he sat in that little room or in his bedroom as he proceeded to go through all the data the General sent him. They watched as he was alone with nobody around him, barely taking any breaks, barely eating or drinking. They watched him as his appearance became more haggard. As his body slumped further into itself and withered slightly in pain as he continually flashed over and over again gathering the Intel that was required of him. That only he could provide via the program in his head.

General Beckman frowned at Bryce's comment and she too became concerned and nodded her head that she had in fact seen him.

"Yes Agent Larkin I have. As you are aware I requested you all to keep an eye on the surveillance on him and I myself have also seen it. It has been noted that Mr. Bartowski does not flourish at all in confinement."

Again Casey let out a grunt in agreement, and it caused Sarah to be hopeful. That now that Beckman witnessed firsthand how Chuck would react in such a situation that she would take placing him in a bunker off the table. But then again, that would very few other options available for Chuck. She would just have to come up with a fool proof plan for if that ever came into fruition.

"So now that you are telling us about this General does this mean we're finished here and headed home to arrest the Agents there?" Casey said hopefully, a small glean in his eyes that usually meant he was hoping they would give a fight.

"Not quite yet. But very soon. I want to you keep an eye on them via the feeds. They've been accessing more and more of Castles databanks so we are getting closer to finding out who is involved and what they are looking for. We know they are looking for the Intersect but we want more information. You are to start closing down this operation and in two days' time you are to go back to Burbank. Do not tell Bartowski any of this."

With that the screen went black as she closed off the connection, leaving the three Agents sitting there thinking about what had been revealed. The whole thing sounded like a giant mess and they were each concerned about how the cleanup will go and how those involved, namely Chuck will be at the end of it.

Sarah looked up at the wall of screens and studied Chucks form as he sat in the small room in Castle with the iPad in front of him. She watched him closely as his eyes moved quickly back and forth as he flashed on whatever he was viewing until it stopped. He would shake his head, grimacing in pain for a moment before working on the iPad logging his results. He looked so exhausted.

But at least she was going to get to go home soon. To Chuck. The first thing she wanted to do was to pick up her phone right there and call him, to tell him the good news. She wanted to see the relief on his face when she told him and maybe see a smile cross his lips. Something she hadn't seen much at all, only small glimpses when she called him and was watching the feeds. He could do with some good news right about now.

"Larkin." Casey's voice rang out breaking her concentration as Chuck flashed again. She looked between the two on either side of her. She evidently missed whatever unspoken conversation that was going on between him and Casey because with an annoyed glare Bryce reluctantly got up from his seat and left the room, leaving Sarah and Casey alone again.

She looked over at Casey expectantly but he was focused on the screens in the front. She followed his sight to Chuck whose head was tilted down in his hands, his shoulders rose up and down showing that he was taking deep measure breaths and the way he clawed his fingers into his tresses alerted him to the pain he must be feeling at the moment. They had talked about that a few times, what it was like to flash and Chuck had admitted that after multiple flashes he tended to get very intense headaches.

A small smile crept to her face at the memory of one such time not too long ago. An arms dealer was having a soiree in one of LA's swankiest hotels with Sarah and Chuck going as guests. It had been a relatively mission as missions went. Their only job was to identify who was there and maybe see what they were doing. It had been set to be a very tedious boring time with small talk amongst strangers and meeting new people.

She had been looking forward to getting Chuck out on the dance floor, remembering the first date and how he seemed to really enjoy her dancing around him. Although this time she intended on him participating more. But there were more bad guys there than they had originally anticipated and after about forty flashes they had to make a hasty exit as Chuck dashed off to a corner and quietly, or as quietly as possible heaved up the hors d'oeuvre he had consumed during the evening.

She had gotten him to her hotel room and had put him into bed before making the call to Casey to report to Beckman on the situation. Casey had mocked and made a few jokes at Chuck's expense but she could tell by the lack of sting to them that he was just as concerned as she was. She had changed into a pair of boy shorts and one of Chuck's t-shirts before climbing into bed next to him, placing his head gently on her lap as he whimpered at the movement.

Nothing was said. Nothing could be said. Chuck was in too much pain to speak or make reason of anything, only able to clutch tightly to the blanket around him as Sarah gently ran her fingers threw his soft hair over and over again in a soothing manner, occasionally stopping to rub his temple a little. She had fallen asleep sitting up with her fingers entwined in his hair still but she could still feel the weight of his head on her lap and the warmth of his body against hers.

"Do you think we should tell him?" Casey asked once again breaking Sarah's concentration. She looked from the screen to him with curious eyes, knowing what he meant but not wanting to be the one to put the words out there. They stayed like that several moments before Casey shrugged his large shoulders and indicated Chuck with a tilt of his head.

"Beckman said not to." She pointed out and he grunted. "I want to tell him." She admitted, hating that she wanted to break protocol. The old Sarah Walker would never even consider that. But that didn't stop her from feeling it now.

"I think there's more to it than what she's telling us Walker. Or there's more going on in Burbank than what we can see." He told her quietly. Sarah nodded her head agreeing.

"But what? He's always on camera. Aside from working too much….I don't understand." She let out a huff and tilted her head back to rest on the back of her chair. Nothing made any sense to her.

"He's not always on camera Sarah. There are the car rides, the bathrooms, and of when he goes over to my house."

"Don't you have security camera in your apartment?" She asked him confused. Casey had security everywhere. But he let out an annoyed grunt again.

"I do but they are jamming the signal and I haven't been able to get any visual. I'm just glad I removed all the fun stuff." He told her. She sat up abruptly alarmed.

"Why didn't you tell me this Casey?" She said angrily and he just shrugged. "Don't-..It's something I needed to know. To keep him safe. Why would you hide it from me?"

"Look, I respect you and think you do a great job. You're the best partner I've ever had and while I understand of your lady feelings towards Bartowski and I appreciate that you don't bring that crap to work. The fact of the matter is Chuck is right. If you knew something was wrong you would become unfocused and we needed to finish this mission fast." He explained furiously.

"So why are you telling me now?" She asked him. He sat back from his position and gazed at her a few moments sizing her up.

"Because now I believe that there is something wrong and you needed to know. Those are Fulcrum Agents with Bartowski right now. And I think they are doing something."

"Doing what?" Casey shrugged again at her.

"Whatever it takes to shake Bartowski." She thought about that for a moment, looking away from Casey and back to the screen where Chuck had continued on with his assigned task. She could see a bead of sweat and a sheen from his forehead as the flashing begun to take its toll on him again. "I think we should take turns keeping an eye on him more closing until we get back to Burbank."

With that Casey stood up and walked out of the room, leaving Sarah to her own thoughts as she watched the love of her life on the screen. She couldn't believe it, didn't want to believe it but it made so much sense.

Could these Agents be harming Chuck? Could he be hiding it from her? From Everyone? She had no doubt in her mind if he was it wasn't to protect the Agents. She knew he would never hide anything as serious from her for that. But he would hide whatever abuse was going on from her if he felt that it would endanger her life, or made her lose focus on the object at hand.

The thought made her mad. How damn self-sacrificing Chuck could be. It pissed her off. He would endure any amount of pain and injustice just to make sure the ones he loved was safe and happy. It was something that they've argued about over and over again especially during missions when he refused to stay in the damn car.

Her hand itched to grab her phone that was still sitting on the table in front of her. She wanted to call him, to talk to him, but if she did that at the present moment with her mind the way it was now she knew she would spill the beans to him. Tell him that she was coming home.

Instead another idea came to mind and she finally reached out and picked up her phone. Waiting while the phone rang a few times she went over in her head an idea and hoped it would work, knowing the person she was calling would not say no to her.

"Hey Sarah." Morgan's voice rang out as he answered the phone. She couldn't stop the smile that crossed her face at his enthusiasm. She suddenly had gratitude for Morgan Grimes.

"Hey Morgan I need you to do me another favor." She said into the phone, she could practically hear Morgan nodding his head.

"Anything milady. Our dear friend Chuck is in trouble. I don't know what's wrong with him but, it's something serious." He said sincerely. It must be bad if Morgan noticed. But then again he was strangely attuned to anything Chuck. If she were really honest they're lucky he hasn't figured out that Chuck's a spy yet.

"I know and he won't tell me what it is. But the good news is. It's almost over." She said, hoping it wasn't a mistake in telling him. She waited till his cheering and hallelujahs stopped to continue. "But you can't tell Chuck ok? It's going to be a huge surprise. Promise me Morgan."

"Yes yes, of course, anything Sarah. He'll so love this surprise, cause you know, he really doesn't like surprises. Especially in the past couple years for some reason, he's been really against them." He rambled. Sarah smirked as she thought about how the Intersect got stuck in his head and really not shocked that he was against surprises of any form now.

"Yes, well it won't be that big of a surprise, I promise. All I want you to do is spend the evenings at his house with him. Maybe play some of those game…things…you two do. You know just don't let him be alone ok?" She asked him.

"Sure Sarah anything. I'll be glued to him like well glue." She let out a soft laugh at that.

"Well, not that close, I'd like him back with minimal effort Morgan. But, don't let him go over to Casey's place." Morgan was silent for a moment.

"You mean Casey's in-laws?" Morgan questioned and Sarah cringed and looked toward the door, hoping Casey didn't hear that.

"Uh, yeah them. Chuck hasn't said much but I think that-"

"They're bullying him? Yeah I figured that out." He said. Sarah's jaw dropped and she was silent for a moment.

"What…I mean..how…"

"Sarah, I've been with Chuck since 2nd grade. I know all there is to know about him and that includes how he reacts to bullies. Chuck Bartowski is a brave brave man and he has my complete and utter admiration for his strength but sadly that does not extend out to when he himself is being bullied. He'll protect others but himself-"

"He'll suck it up and take it. Damn it Chuck." She muttered.

"Yeah. Sucks but he'll be fine. You're coming back. And as soon as Casey comes back or those bozos find a place to live they'll be gone and away from our Chuckles." Once again Sarah couldn't stop the smile from crossing her face and admire Morgan. Once again amazed, jealous and glad that Chuck had such a friend in his life and wishing she had one like Morgan.

Sarah thanked him, promising to bring him back some souvenirs and making a mental note to pick some up from the gift shop at the airport and hung up. She stared at her phone for a few moments, going over everything in her head.

So these Agents were bullying Chuck. She knew it and now she had more proof. Her eyes narrowed angrily as her jaw clenched and she gripped the phone hard in her hands. Well they better be prepared to suffer the consequences when she gets back.

A/N: Nothing important happened today. I understand you guys wanting quicker resolution and such but its a story (More specfically my story), I want to build it up. Don't worry Sarah will get her revenge but you're going to need to just tough it out.

Neale: Because its mostly in the car or at Caseys. Don't worry, their abuse is almost over...i think.

Marc Vun Kannon: Burn man Burn. While your hypothesis is pretty good it actually is wrong. This takes place in season 2 so no Quinn. And isn't most fanfics all done already and cliche to begin with? Well I hope you stick with me on this journey but if not, I've appreciated your time and reviews.

phathead01: Thank you thank you. I'm glad you're enjoying it. Don't worry, Chuck's suffering will come to an end soon enough, or at least he'll have Sarah.

Wade1978: My goodness did it ever!. I hated any episode that didn't have Mulder. And then when he did come back in S8 it felt awkward and he felt secondary and I hated it. And i hated that damn kid too. I have a few more Casey poke at Larkin coming up soon. ish.

Shutupnkissme313: Who knows, maybe it will be so popular the government would start making money off it.

Jace (Guest): Thank you! I really strive to keep them as close to possible as they would be on the show. I like Chuck being the timid nerd who can stand up for himself when needed but is ok with himself for taking the cowards way out. I like Sarah being conflicted with her emotions and not just blurting things out but hiding them. That is the charactors. And no, my boss did not. I actually got a reprimand by putting the actual quote of what he said to me in his account notes instead of censuring it.

Batty 02 (Guest): He does but the abuse isn't going on while in castle therefore they can't see it, only the results of it. Bring me some popcorn too. I like kettle corn but i'll settle for butter if needed.

sevenrez: Can I just say i love you. Honestly, I love your reviews and I'm glad someone seems to be appreciating the effort in which i abuse chuck lol. I LOVE the guy to pieces and i LOVE having him need Sarah to fix him. To which she shall begin doing in the next few chapters.

wilf21: oh this makes me sad! I'll miss you! *sniffle* But I understand. maybe come back after a few more chapters and see if its better? Sarah and Chuck will be back together soon. With a bigger reason to actually harm the new agents.

MrBi11: I'll have to come up with more quips like that, people love it! Thank you for reviewing! i'm glad you're enjoying it.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Another chapter! YAY! Thank you Charahkids for being my beta! and thank you for all who have read the story and follow it. Personal thanks to reviewers is of course below.

Chapter 10

Dropping his phone on the bed after disconnecting with Sarah, Chuck closed his eyes, blocking out the sunlight that filtered through his curtains and let his mind wander for a second. Not focusing on anything in particular. He hated lying. He hated secrets. And he especially hated lying and keeping secrets from Sarah, especially when she knows he's doing it and he still refuses to come clean.

But he couldn't do it. He couldn't let her be burdened with his misery when she was in such a dangerous situation. He wanted to keep her safe, and while he was miserable and being bullied here at home without her it was nothing that he couldn't survive. Couldn't handle. He's dealt with bullies his whole life and this was nothing.

Though if he was honest with himself this was a whole new level than he was used to. For one he hadn't been molested by past bullies, but at least he hasn't gotten any wedgies or swirlies. He figured when that happened it would be about the time he should tell at least Beckman about it, or at least call Casey.

Letting out a deep breath and holding it out until his lungs burned with the desperate need for air, Chuck finally reopened his eyes and gave the camera in the corner one last glance before finally sitting back up and stepped out of bed.

He rubbed his eyes tiredly as he grabbed some clean boxers and a shirt and headed for the bathroom, ignoring the delicious smell of coffee coming from the kitchen that was beckoning for him to go there instead. But he knew there was where Ellie was and he quite frankly was not ready to talk to her yet about what had happened last night.

Closing the door he turned on the shower to let it warm up and stood in front of the sink. He stared at his reflection in the mirror and felt a pang of sadness at his appearance. He barely recognized himself. He could see his face had gotten thinner, and his skin seemed paler than usual since he'd been spending all his time in a bunker. He could see the stress and exhaustion in his eyes that he felt throughout his body. He hoped this mission would end soon.

He took his time in the shower, feeling his muscles and skin tingle happily as the hot water cascaded over his body. Lathering himself up with soap he felt as if he was cleaning away all the secrets and lies, all the bruises and imaginary marks that he could feel all over himself. He was starting fresh only for it to come back as soon as he left the soothing water, but he enjoyed for the moment and felt a smile upon his face. He stood there for an indeterminate amount of time until finally the water began to turn slightly cold and he was forced to exit and start his day.

Chuck walked back into his bedroom in clean boxers and a white undershirt and glanced again at the camera like he did every morning since it was installed before moving about to get dressed for day. Looking at the clock finally as he buttoned up his Nerd Herd shirt he internally groaned at realizing he was ten minutes late from meeting Agent Coleman out front and quickly bent down to put his converse on and tie them.

With a final swipe of his hands down his shirt to smooth out any winkles, Chuck grabbed his phone from the bed and headed out of his room and down the hall quickly.

"Hey you." Ellies voice stopped him as he passed the kitchen, coming to a complete stop. "How are you doing?"

Chuck back tracked the few steps passed the entryway and spied her leaning against the counter with a cup of coffee in front of her sipping it.

"Hey Ellie, what's up?" He asked her nervously, hiding his cringe and berating himself for not using the Morgan Door.

"I don't know, you tell me." She said, taking another drink from her mug. Chuck shrugged his shoulders nonchalant, hoping that she would drop the entire subject but knowing she wouldn't. Ellie placed her mug down on the counter and crossed her arms over her chest expectantly, ever patient.

He tried not to make eye contact with her, knowing that she could probably wrangle out the answer if he did. She had nothing on Casey in interrogation so he kept his eyes looking just passed her and hoping she wouldn't notice. The silence stretched out between them and it seemed as if Ellie wasn't going to leave it without some kind of answer.

"I just…It's nothing Ellie, I'm sorry." He stumbled bleakly, knowing that his sister would not leave it at that either. She quirked her brown at him and shifted to her other leg.

"It didn't seem like nothing to me Chuck. It looked anything but." She said. Chuck didn't have a response for her, his mouth moving up and down like a fish but no sounds would come through. Ellie waited for his reply but none was forth coming and they stood there in silence for several moments, until Chuck glanced down at his watch and noted the time.

"I'm really sorry Ellie but this is going to have to wait, I have to go." He said and began walking away but was stopped by her hand on his forearm.

He looked back at her and felt his stomach bottom at the look of love and concern that was written so plainly across her face. And he was going to lie to her, again. He would always lie to her now. There was no way around it, but he kept his mouth closed for the moment.

"Chuck, seriously. You come home after we haven't seen you in weeks and have an emotional breakdown on our couch. Something is wrong." She accused, gazing hard at him and gripping his arm tightly. He couldn't return her gaze and instead stared at her hand where she gripped him, holding him in place when all he wanted to do was get away and get the day over with.

They stood in silence for several more moments, the time ticking by slowly as it drew out. Ellie finally released her hold on him and dropped her arm to her side as she continued to stare at him worried. She sighed wearily once she realized that no answer would be forth coming from Chuck and he felt an ache inside his chest at knowing that he was causing Ellie, the woman who had essentially if not completely raised him.

Even when his mother was there she wasn't always actually around. Always preoccupied with work, on the phone, looking at paperwork. Chuck remembered the sometimes strange people that would show up at odd hours to speak to his mother. And most importantly, the long absences throughout the 9 years she was there, the longest being the last one where she had yet to come back from.

Through all of that Ellie was there for him making sure he was up and off to school, fed and lunch packed. She checked over his homework and made sure he was bathed and put into bed on time before waking up the next day to do it all over again.

He knew it all began when he was really young but he knew the sacrifices she had made for him. How she could have been out with friends or on school functions but instead decided to stay home with him and take care of him and when their father was around, take care of their father as well. He still felt guilty, even years later that she had missed her junior prom because he had gotten a bad case of the flu and her senior prom because he had broken his hand and needed to be taken to the hospital. But she never grumbled or complained, though he knew how much stress it must have been for her.

With those memories flying through his mind at top speed, and seeing the concerned look on her face, he hated himself more at that moment for all the lying he's had to do, especially now when all he wanted to do was have her wrap her arms around him again like she did last night and comfort him, whisper that everything would be alright and believe her.

"I'm sorry Ellie, I have to go." He told her finally, still not meeting her gaze and he rushed passed her and to the door. He grabbed his keys from the bowl that sat on the table and exited the apartment, not looking back to see the hurt expression that he knew was on his sister's face.

Closing the door firmly behind him he closed his eyes tightly against the bright sunlight that smacked him in the face and grimaced as he took some calming breaths to sooth his beating heart. The day was starting off bad and he'd only been up for a little over an hour. His mind felt scrambled as he mentally grasped for something solid in hold on to only to find nothing and he felt lightheaded.

"It's about time, what took you so long." Agent Coleman's voice sounded and grated in his ear and he grimaced once more before finally reopening his eyes.

Agent Coleman stood there by the fountain, dressed in her typical short skirt and tight blouse, arms crossed over her chest with an annoyed look on her face. To protect his cover with Sarah they've been meeting outside the apartment and carpooling that way, even though Ellie and Devon knew and believed that the people living in Casey's apartment were his family. Still, Chuck felt it was easier and needed less explaining if they weren't see together much.

However now it was blown out of the water as Agent Coleman reached out and grabbed the same arm that Ellie had released just moments ago and looped her arm in his elbow and leaned her head on his shoulder with a flirty grin. He looked at her confused for a moment as she tugged him along out of the courtyard, panic coursing through him as he spotted Ellies shocked face at the window of their living room as he left.

He felt the heat rise up his neck and onto his face as he imagined what Ellie must be thinking right now. What she saw. He could only hope that it didn't end badly for him and that he can convince her that what she saw isn't what she thought. Or something like that.

Chuck shook his head, clearing the cobwebs and confusing thoughts as he was shoved roughly into the passenger's side of Agent Coleman's car, hitting his head on the top of it as his tall frame hunched into itself once more to fit in the seat. He looked up once more to see Coleman give a small cringe at the mark that was developing on his head from the frequent head bangs and it confused him. Normally she would grin like the Cheshire cat, enjoying the pain that she frequently inflicted on him.

This time however she smoothed his hair down onto his forehead soothingly before closing the door and walking around the vehicle to get inside the driver's seat. He watched her warily as she turned on the car, revving the engine and bracing himself as much as possible for her to fly out of her spot. However the expected lurch and belt burn that he had come to know didn't come as she pulled out slowly and pulled out onto the street.

Chuck didn't say a word, afraid to break whatever peace was between them for the moment as they drove toward the Orange Orange. He kept his eyes straight ahead watching the car in front of them as the Agent followed at a safe distance, or as safe as any Agent would follow as they trudge the morning traffic to work.

It felt like it took hours to get to the spy base instead of the twenty minutes it actually was, and as the Agent pulled up into the spot behind the Orange Orange, Chuck couldn't help but sit there for an extra moment or two longer as he waited for whatever was about to happen to happen. But to his surprise, and alarm the Agent just gave him a large smile and patted him gently on his thigh, causing him to jump slightly at the touch bumping his head once more on the roof as she exited her car.

He sat there for a few moments longer as Agent Coleman stood at the door waiting for him to follow. Reluctantly he unbuckled his belt and got out of the car, closing the door and followed. He jumped slightly as she ran her hand down his arm in what would normally be a comforting manner but coming from her after everything she'd done to him left nothing but alarm in its wake.

They entered Castle's main room and he stopped as Coleman walked around him and towards a computer console nearby. He hesitated, debating if he should say or do something before heading back to his secure little corner but decided against it and began heading down the corridor, only to be stopped when Agent Coleman called his name.

"Can you come here please?" She asked him standing next to her empty chair. He approached her apprehensively and waited for whatever to happen to happen. "You're good at computers right?" She asked him. Chuck just nodded his head. She gave him a kind smile before indicating he should sit in the chair in front of the console that she had claimed as her own all this time. He did so hesitantly, Coleman lurking a little too close to him for his liking. He inhaled deeply trying to calm his nerves, readying himself for whatever she would dish out to him but all he got was a whiff of her perfume that smelled very familiar as it was the same one that Sarah preferred and it made his heart ache slightly missing her presence.

He sat in front of the computer, not touching it as he waited for her to tell him what exactly it was that she needed from him. She crowded over him, invading his personal space as he once again bunched his long body together as close as he could to take up as little room as possible and avoid touching her, but no matter how much he did she would just crowd him more. Finally she hunched down, giving him a clear view of her own assets as she pressed some buttons on the keyboard and brought up a search engine that he recognized as the CIA's.

It was a comprehensive search engine only used by the higher ups in the government, normal people such as agents and civilians like him didn't have access to it, and according to Beckman shouldn't even know that it exists. He'd had used it many times in the past few weeks, seeking out information he received from his flashes. It was the only reason he was allowed to, because of the Intersect in his brain Beckman informed him that there really wasn't anything that was on the server that he didn't already have in his brain and the president had granted him permission himself in order to conduct analysis.

But Chuck didn't think anyone other than Beckman and the president knew that he could get into it and his heart raced at top speed, causing his nerves to tingle as he saw the presidential seal turn on the screen and the blinking of the login plate waiting for his input. He felt his face begin to flush and sweat start beading on his forehead as he waited for her instructions, deciding to play ignorant to what he was seeing.

"This here is an intelligence search engine." She explained and moves the mouse the select the login user name.

He waited with baited breath as in what seemed like slow motion, she leaned over him and the keyboard and began typing in some login name and password. Seeing that she didn't expect him to use his own secret credentials, he let out his held breath slowly as oxygen entered into his starved lungs. Bringing up his left hand, he wiped his forehead with the back of it, feeling the moisture come across it as he rubbed it off on his pant leg, feeling his hands begin to get clammy.

"We've been trying to locate someone but we've been unsuccessful." She told him standing up again. "But maybe you'll be able to be more successful."

"Wh-who are you looking for?" He stuttered looking up at her for the first time. She gazed at him hard, studying him and Chuck felt as if she could see right through him and read his mind and see his inner workings, but then she blinked and turned away.

"We are looking for this Agent, named Bryce Larkin."

Chuck's eyes widened as his body felt as if someone dumped a bucket of ice water on him at the sound of Bryce's name. Red flags drew up in his head and vision that something wasn't right and he stared straight ahead at the blinking line in the search space, afraid to turn to look at Agent Coleman.

"Chuck?" She asked him, giving him a nudge with her hip. He shook his head lightly before finally turning his eyes away from the screen and looking up at her questioningly. "What is it?" She asked.

"Nothing. Nothing absolutely nothing. Bryce Larkin? Uh…what are you looking for him for?" He stumbled, taking deep breaths and trying to calm his racing heart. He had no idea who this woman really was and he was alone with her and didn't want to raise any suspicions about him. Even if he needed to defend himself he knew he'd already fail due to her being a girl.

"He stole something really important and we've been tasked to bring him in." She explained stepping back a little which gave Chuck some relief. "Problem is, his covers been deactivated and he's been proclaimed dead."

Chuck's eyes widened once more as he realized who Agent Coleman really was and what they were after. She was a Fulcrum agent and she was here to find Bryce Larkin and to find the Intersect. His mind raced with that knowledge and his first instinct was to call Sarah. He wondered if she would allow him to get up and use the restroom or something so that he could do just that but he was glued to his spot as she reached over from behind him, arms wrapped around his neck as she began typing into the keyboard.

He tried to hold his breath, not liking that this woman was using the same perfume as Sarah, not liking that his body reacted in any sort of way to it. Her arms were heaving on his shoulders and her breath was warm against his cheek as she turned her head to look at him with that flirty grin she tended to have and it took all his will power not to turn his head to look back at her, but stare directly in front of him at the screen.

After a few seconds the computer beeped with a result and Bryce Larkins CIA file came up on the screen. On one side was a series of pictures through his years of being an Agent. They all looked official, probably used for the file and his access badges. On the other side was his stats and information, links to reports he's filed and mission statuses through the years. He wanted so badly to click on them and read them. To learn all he could about his former best friend's time in the CIA, something he's thought a lot about since he was sent the Intersect. But he knew he had to play it cool, had to play ignorant as to not arouse suspicion until he could call Sarah.

"If he's dead than why…"

"Because he's not really dead Chuck. You see your partner, John Casey was the man who shot him, killed him. But he didn't really die, you see. We have ways of keeping people alive who have use for us and Bryce Larkin was one of them." She explained. Chuck looked at her then, not able to stare at the stoic expression of Bryce any longer.

"Well if you had him what happened?" He asked, knowing full well what happened next.

Agent Coleman stood up then and turned away from Chuck for a second. He was glad, grateful, even for the bumps that appeared on his skin as the cold air of Castle engulfed him completely again. He turned in his chair to watch her as she turned back to him once more, an angry look upon her face.

"He got away that's what happened. The enemy got their hands on him and he's been hiding in their ranks ever since. Its imperative that we locate him." She said determinedly. Chuck just nodded his head in agreement, not quite sure what else to say.

With that he turned away from her, looked panicked for a moment at the computer screen before he began typing so more. With two weeks practice Chuck was well versed in the working of this search database and was able to navigate along it like a pro, much to Coleman's delight. She stayed by his side the whole time, watching with rapt attention as he searched for Bryce in the system.

However nothing he did was bringing up results, much to both his dismay and delight. He didn't really want to find what they were looking for, obviously not wanting to betray his friend but he couldn't think of a way out of it without putting him, the real Intersect in any more trouble. Luckily he didn't seem to have to worry about it as the CIA must have known that eventually someone would come looking for him and didn't put any link from his new cover to his profile.

He heard Coleman's frustrated sigh next to him a few hours later as he yet again hit a dead end. He paused his fingers from their typing to look at her to see her scowl down at the computer. Letting out another annoyed huff Agent Colman reached over in front of Chuck and turned off the database. They had been searching for at least four hours and nothing had come up.

"I'm sorry." He said in a soft voice, not wanting to make her angrier but not able to take the silence that surrounded them.

Agent Coleman didn't respond right away, just staring at him for a moment contemplating something before she finally sat down for the first time in the chair near him. He resisted the urge to scoot his chair a bit further back from her as she leaned over with a sad smile and held on to his hands. He felt his hands clam up immediately as he fought the urge to tug them free from her tight grasp, but she didn't seem to notice as she leaned closer to him.

"It's not your fault Chuck, you tried." She said comforting him. "You got a lot further than we ever have." Chuck quirked his brow slightly but quickly turned it back to its lax position the best he could.

"Us? As in Agent Leyan?" He inquired. Coleman nodded her head answering.

"He's my partner. We thought the answer would be here, in this base but it's not. I was sure if anyone could find anything it was you; I told him that since the beginning." She told him, giving his hands a tight squeeze to which Chuck luckily hid his grimace.

"Well, I'm sorry I couldn't help you, but thank you for giving me a chance to." He said and stood up from the chair, taking the moment to get away from the Agent in front of him. But she held on tightly to his hand even as she continued to sit. Her gaze was focused on one part of his body suddenly and he felt heat rise from his neck and up to his cheeks and he tried to gently get away.

His squirming brought her out of whatever trance she was in and she looked up at him, eyes heavy as she licked her lips seductively. He looked away from her and down the corridor towards the secure room he should have been in already doing dailies and wished that he was there now instead of in the current uncomfortable situation he found himself in.

His brain worked quickly as he finally disentangled his hands from hers and backed away a bit, scooting the chair he'd been using in a bit so no one would trip on it.

"I'm just going to, you know-" 'Call Sarah!' his brain supplied as backed up a bit. "Get back to my own work that the General assigned. You know how she can be." He stumbled hitting the table behind him hard as he turned quickly around.

Agent Coleman let out a light laugh as she stood up and walked over to him. She looped her arm through his quickly before he could protest and leaned in against him till she felt her breath once again on his cheek.

"I think it's time I give you your reward for helping me and being a good little asset all this time." She whispered to him and let out a giggle. Chuck let out a strangled smile as he tried unsuccessfully to get her unlatched from his arm.

"Oh we'll, I'll accept a thank you in less pinches really." He suggested helpfully, causing her to laugh again. He didn't quite get it, he didn't understand what he was saying that she was finding so funny.

Without another word she held tightly to him and walked with him down the hallway. He let out a sigh of relief believing they were going to his secure room where he could contact Sarah and tell her to send help immediately. That he was stuck in Castle with a Fulcrum Agent and they were after Bryce Larkin. But at the last turn Coleman went left instead of right and stopped in front of a door that he recognized as a supply closet.

He knew this one well as it was the one that he and Sarah used, unofficially, whenever they were trapped in Castle for long periods of time, or just whenever Sarah needs to let out some steam. Or just whenever let him. It was a private place, probably the only one in Castle aside from the bathroom as there was no security camera in there.

With that thought dread and fear took over Chuck as he watched her open the door then shove him in, closing the door behind them.

Sarah couldn't sleep. She didn't know why, well. That's not true. She knew exactly why. What she had learned earlier that day from both Beckman and Morgan has bothered her greatly and she held in all the anger that she just wanted to release. More specifically on the Agents who were currently taking over her base with her asset.

She couldn't believe what Beckman had said, how she knew who they were. She couldn't believe that they would put Chuck in such danger and she was never more glad that she had been prepared for him in case he needed to get away.

They had spent the rest of the day shutting down the operation and getting ready to leave. They already had their flights back to Burbank scheduled for the day after next and she had packed up her suitcase and cleaned the room ready to go the second she could. And thankfully the others were as well as she learned.

She had tried to call Chuck all afternoon, but he hadn't answered. She had checked the security feeds for Castle and his house and didn't see him there at all and she wondered if perhaps he took the day off and was out with Morgan.

She grabbed her phone off the bed side table and brought up the GPS tracking app she had installed on it and looked at the dot. According to the GPS in his watch he was still at the Buy More area, and his phone location was the same. She thought about hacking into the other systems but decided against it, giving Chuck some privacy for at least a little while.

She ached to call him again, to have him answer and to hear his voice. To apologize to him for getting all worked up earlier and explain to him that she's just worried and scared. To hear that he was safe even with Fulcrum Agents running around so close to him.

As if on cue and he was reading her desperate plea her phone rang and she knew it was him. She smiled down at her phone for a second expecting to see his smiling face, but frowned when it came up unknown.

"Hello?" She answered hesitantly. There were no sounds on the other line at first and Sarah strained to hear if someone was on the other end. "Hello? Who is this?" She asked again and waited.

Her heart beat rapidly at the inhalation of breath and what sounded like a muffled sniffle and she knew who it was right away.

"Chuck?" She asked desperately, waiting for him to answer. When none came she tried again. "Chuck is that you?"

Another deep gasp and a slight clearing of a throat was heard before he replied, not making her feel any better at all.

"It's me." He croaked.

"Chuck, what's wrong? What happened?" She asked him alarmed. But no reply came. Only sad desperate sobs that broke her heart. She listened to it for several moments before she got up from her bed begun getting dressed. "Chuck." She said desperately.

Finally a loud sniff could be heard and she hears that he was trying to get his breath back. She didn't know what would cause him such distress but she vowed that she would hunt down what or who caused it and break them till they hurt more than Chuck at that moment.

"Sarah." His hoarse voice came through again, and Sarah listened with abated breath. "I think you need to come home."

A/N: So, I'm aiming to get one more chapter out than I'm afraid there wont be an update most likely until about the 6th or 7th of May(maybe a few days later.) The reason is the Kentucky Derby is next week and I normally work about 60+ hours and wont have any time or mental capacity to write. Of course I say this every year. Though if i HAPPEN to write something of course I will post it.

** sevenrez:** I totally agree with you. I really feel that those who overcome the angst in their lives are the strongest people out there. Its why I love to read that stuff and I can't help but write them. I'm glad you are enjoying this.

** Neale:** I promise a happy ending.

**knightrid3r:** I try to come up with original ideas. I try to think of what most people would expect and go eleswhere. There is so much about Chuck and his world that could be explored and I feel that most stick with cliched storylines. I'm glad that I seem to be keeping chuck how he would be on the show. I like them being true to themselves. Thank you for reading!

**Nomadic Nerd:** 1)While I like Beckman personally, I understand how Chuck would be afraid to tell her, to complain to her. Afraid of what the alternative would be. 2) Oh don't worry. I already have the ending battle between Sarah/Coleman. And its beautiful. 3) Yeah i didn't think that one through, I'll have to come up with some logical explanation and put it in an upcoming chapter lol. Thanks for pointing it out though!

**Wade1978:** I always thought Chuck would wilther in a bunker. He's too much of a butterfly.

**noblz100:** Oh don't worry. What I have planned, she's coming out in full force...er...you just gotta be patient.

**phathead01:** Yes, I'm sad that they left but what can you do. I'm not going to change my writing and my story to please people, I'm going to write what I want to write and go where the story directs me. And if people like it, I'm glad, if not *shrugs* your loss. And to be honest, have you seen my other stories, its pretty obvious what my main genere is lol. I'm glad you are enjoying it and I always look forward to reading your reviews. Its followers like you that I know I'm doing alright and whose opinions mean the most in any case.

**batty02:** Yes, I think my next story will be a nice vacation piece. Or maybe i should write a littel sabatical in here. They definitely deserve it! thanks for the idea!. I can put all that mushy 'romance' stuff people keep wanting in!.


	11. Chapter 11

Thank you to charahkids for being my beta!

I did do personal thanks but the 1st time the page refreshed and i hadn't saved, 2nd time wouldn't take the saves so i gave up. But i DO appreciate all your reviews. And don't worry. I have the demise all planned out and it will be awesome. When we get there...someday.

Chapter 11

"Chuck. What happened?" Sarah asked him urgently scooting to the edge of the bed and getting up. Chuck didn't respond, and all she could hear was more breathing as he tried to gather himself. Her heart ached to be there and hold him, to hide him from whatever had caused him this grief and protect him. And to find out what had caused whatever pain he seemed to be going through and end it or them.

Sarah slipped on her shoes, mumbling to Chuck, letting him know she was there, afraid to leave him as she quickly opened her door and crossed the hallway to where Casey's room was and pounded on the door. It only took a moment for the door to open, Sarah ignoring the gun that was pointed at her as she focused on her call.

"Chuck, please talk to me." she practically pleaded. Casey got the message and gave a grunt as he closed his door again, only to open a second later with his bag in his hand as he tucked his gun away.

"What's going on?" Bryce asked coming out of his own room and Sarah raised her hand annoyed at his loud intrusion and turned away back into her bedroom where Casey had gone. Chuck still hadn't said a word to her but she could still hear him, which was better than nothing.

"We have a flight in half an hour; Beckman is sending a team to pick up the Leyan and Coleman. Let's go." He said in his usual gruff manner as he picked up Sarah's suitcase that lay at the foot of the bed, walking out of her room.

"Did you hear that Chuck? We're coming home ok?" She asked as they walked briskly down the hall. They had just turned the corner to the stairs when they heard running and they stopped and turned seeing Bryce following them with his own bag.

"I'm coming with you." He said catching up. Casey growled annoyed and place his large hand roughly on Bryce's chest.

"I don't think so princess. You cause enough trouble." He told him annoyed.

"He's my friend Casey, if he's in trouble-"

"Yeah, if he's how you treat your friends than-"

"Enough!" Sarah shouted startling them both. She had dropped the phone slightly and covered the mouth piece so Chuck couldn't hear. She glared at the both of them. "Bryce is coming with us we may need help. We have to go now."

And with that she brought the phone back to her ear and begun talking to Chuck again, soothing words, trying to calm him, trying to get the info they would need out of him, but nothing was forth coming. Nothing but silent sniffles and quiet one word answers.

Finally they were on the plane and Sarah sat eagerly in her seat by the window waiting for the flight to get approval to leave. She was anxious and though it was a private plane she knew it would still take at least 3 hours to get back to Burbank and then another hour to get to Barstow.

"Chuck." She said once more as the pilot informed them they were now heading for the runway. "I have to go." She said sadly.

"No, Sarah. Please." He begged quietly, and she heard more tears coming, alarming her more.

"I don't want to Chuck but I'm on the plane now ok? I'm coming home. I'm coming to get you." She said, and he didn't reply. "What I want you to do is get some sleep ok? Or at least try to sleep. You sound so exhausted."

There was no reply for a moment and Sarah began to worry even more. She wished she knew more about the situation but she couldn't seem to get anything but hysterics out of Chuck. She waited another moment until she heard the engines turn on indicating she only had another moment or two.

"Chuck…" She pleaded.

"Ok." He said simply, relief filling her and hoping that he will at least be exhausted enough to at least fall into some kind of sleep. She gave him her last directions to stay inside and keep the phone on and with him before finally disconnecting.

She placed the phone in her lap and stared out the window as the plane took off and they were finally on their way to Burbank. She hated not knowing exactly what was going on, and she felt a pang of dread about the whole situation. She knew whatever it was that happened was big, was major. She had seen Chuck scared out of his mind countless times since this whole thing began and his response to fear and anxiety was usually incoherency and stumbling.

However now, the call she just had, it was nothing like she'd ever experienced with Chuck. His silence, his anguish. She felt it all like a hammer to her gut as she tried to coax out of him what happened, what was wrong, the lack of information coming forth from him frightening her more than getting information.

"So what's the situation?" Casey said, sitting next to her, startling her from her worries and thoughts on Chuck. She turned from the window to gaze at Casey for a moment before looking away at the back of the seat in front of her.

"I don't know." She admitted quietly, feeling the heat of Casey's gaze on her.

"What do you mean?" He asked gruffly. Sarah shifted in her chair and looked up to see Bryce looking back at them from over the seats in front of them. He leaned on the back of them as he waited for her answer as well.

"I mean I don't know. All he would say is that we need to come back. He was kind of-" She didn't know how to explain how he was. She was too panicked and worried to really think about putting it into words at the moment.

"That's not like Chuck. He's usually very verbose." Bryce said, cutting in. "But I'm sure we can piece together basically what happened. Beckman knew those Agents were Fulcrum. Maybe Chuck found out."

"He wasn't captured was he?" Casey interrupted. Sarah shook her head.

"No, he's not. He's safe, at least for now." She informed them. She told them of her stash of documents and cash and the instructions she had left for Chuck in the event that something happened. She couldn't look at Casey the whole time she explained what she had done for Chuck, afraid that she'd see the betrayal in her partners eyes. But after several moments of silence afterword's she finally looked up, meeting his eyes and he gave a simple nod.

"It was a good idea Walker." He said simply, and that was the end of that.

They decided to divide and conquer once they landed in Burbank. Casey and Bryce would go to where the Agents were currently being held, they had gotten word right before takeoff that they had been caught unaware in Casey's apartment. And Sarah would go off towards Barstow to collect Chuck. The General had not been pleased about the turn of events and had ordered them to review the security footages from that day while they were stuck on the plane.

Sarah stared at the screen in front of her, watching Chuck as he worked on the computer, wishing she knew what he was doing on that console. She had asked Casey to check the logs but they were limited with what they could run while in the air.

She saw red at seeing how close Coleman was to him, how she kept touching him, getting close to him. How she leaned over his back to reach the computer. She felt an urge to go to the CIA facility where they were and rip her head off for touching Chuck.

Though she did feel some delight in seeing that Chuck was rebuffing her obvious advances, though she felt saddened and pained at seeing the fear that stayed on his face the whole time. She didn't know how bad it truly was for him the past two weeks but whatever was really happening, Chuck was terrified and withdrawn.

"I didn't see anything." Casey said next to her, breaking her concentration. She looked at him questioningly. "The feeds. I reviewed them every day. There were no sign of anything wrong." Sarah nodded her understanding.

"So whatever was happening to Chuck, they knew we were watching them." She finished for him, not liking that at all.

She never understood why people picked on Chuck. Aside from hearing about all his misadventures growing up and even into adult hood she had seen it many times herself. For some reason people just saw his kind nature and wanted the throttle him. They wanted to berate him, and make him feel small. But somehow Chuck always got over that, always was the bigger person. He would let them have their fun and then he would shrug it off. It bothered her that he did that so often but she couldn't change him, wasn't sure she wanted to. He was too kind and understanding for his own good.

"Why would Beckman have us come all the way to Maryland? Leaving Chuck unprotected like that with two Fulcrum agents. That was dangerous and stupid." Sarah stated frustrated. She knew Casey agreed with her even though no reply came. He would never speak ill of his superiors no matter what.

Sarah looked at her watch and noted the time, seeing that they only had one more hour of torture before they would finally land and she could be on her way to Chuck. Taking a deep calming breath to clear her mind she turned back to the video feed in time to watch as Chuck stood from the chair he was in with Coleman holding onto his hands, staring right at his crotch. She didn't like the look that crossed the other agents face.

Chuck moved away from Coleman and by a table as if heading down the hall only to be stopped by Coleman as she looped her arm through his and leaned in close to him and whispered something. Chuck looked uncomfortable and she could tell that he was resisting the urge to just bolt away, but he stayed there in fear. Sarah followed the feed as Coleman led Chuck down the hallway and she switched feeds to watch their trek down it. For a moment Sarah thought that Coleman was just escorting him down to his secure room where he worked but instead veered in the other direction stopping in front of the supply closet she knew very well.

"Oh god." She said softly and covered her mouth with her hand as she watched Chuck struggle a bit to get away only to be shoved into the closet and the door shut tight behind Coleman.

"What is it?" Casey asked noticing her posture and looked over her shoulder at the screen displaying only and empty hall and a closet door.

Sarah didn't answer him as she began fast forwarding on security feed. She started it again about a half hour later as the closet door reopened and Chuck bolted out of it, running down the hallway and out of Castle. She switched to the outside feed as Chuck exited out behind the Orange Orange and got in her car driving away quickly.

Switching back to the feed of the hallway she felt bile rise in her stomach at seeing Agent Coleman step out of the doorway and start buttoning up her shirt. Still holding her hand to her mouth she slammed the lid of the laptop closed quickly and got up, stepping over ungracefully over Casey as she ran to the back of the plane to the rest room. She knelt on the floor in time to release the contents in her stomach as the image and the implications of it ran through her mind.

The images wouldn't stop as she began to dry heave and tears fell down her cheeks from her eyes. It all made sense now, Chucks desperate plea for her to come home. When she had nothing left in her stomach she slumped on the floor and sat there for a few moments catching her breath. She closed her eyes momentarily but had to open them quickly as red was seen behind her lids.

She was going to kill Agent Coleman. Literally kill. She knew that now. One second alone with her and she was going to put all her knife training into action.

A knock on the door broke her out of her visions of violence as she heard Casey's voice on the other side, sounding strangely concerned.

"Just a moment." She hollered to him and stood up, taking a look at herself in the mirror grimacing at her appearance as she tried to straighten her hair and splashed some water on her face before exiting the tiny bathroom finally.

Casey stood just outside leaning against the opposite wall and silently handed her a bottle of water which she took gratefully and drank half the bottle. The last thing she needed at the moment was to truly be sick.

"What happened Walker?" He asked her as they walked back to their seat, Bryce stood by them, his eyes narrowed in concern.

Sarah wasn't sure how to answer, or how much to give. She didn't really have much anyways only suspicions about what had happened. She shook her head again clearing her thoughts and made the decision to just wait till she talked to Chuck before she jumped to any more conclusions. There was no point in reacting to something that might not be as bad as she thought.

"Something really bad I think." She said simply and left it at that.

An hour later they finally landed with a small escort. Casey and Bryce went in one vehicle and Sarah took another one that she had requested in order to go on her own little side quest to get to Chuck. She wasted no time leaving the airport area and heading for the freeway as fast as she dared.

Sarah pressed on the gas a little more to pick up speed as she drove down the empty California highway. It was still early in the and very little traffic was currently out on the street much to her relief as she traveled. She felt like she had been days or weeks as she barreled down the road when in fact it had only been a few hours. She was thankful yet again for having the CIA resources to get her there quicker than she would have if she had been a normal civilian.

She wanted to call Chuck, to tell him that she had landed and that she was on her way to him but due to the early hour she hadn't wanted to, hoping that perhaps he had taken her demand and gotten some sleep. Though knowing what she knew now after watching the feed she could only imagine what kind of nightmares he'd be having if he was in fact able to fall asleep.

"Stop it!" She berated herself out loud. She wasn't going to let herself think on that, not yet. Not until she knew the truth and what happened. She was afraid of focusing on it, knowing that if she were to the anger would build inside of her till she couldn't stop it and something might happen. She was afraid of herself and how she felt at the moment. Never in her life had she ever felt so protective of somebody.

She had spent her whole life watching people in some sort of pain or another, a lot of times she was the cause of said pain. She helped her father con people out of their hard earned money, which they needed to feed their families and pay their bills. That they needed to live on. She had felt bad back then, and still did today even as her father tried to teach her that they were suckers and they deserved it. But seeing sad kids' faces at Christmas as they walked down the streets because they conned the charities, did cause her pain.

The CIA had been no better than her father. Instead of coning for money she was coning for information. Instead of protecting herself and her own interests she was protecting a whole country and what they believed in so they could live freely and safely. And this time she used weapons with the lies she told.

She had never looked back and never felt regret over the missions she was on. She knew that in the process of achieving her mission goals innocent people were getting hurt as well, but she never put much thought into it. Considering them collateral damage. Even when she handled assets in the past she had never felt this way. Close once with a bio scientist name Andrea. She was young, younger than Sarah at the time and sweet as can be. She was generous and considerate much like Chuck. But when the time came to end the assignment, Sarah did feel some remorse but she still placed the bullet in the young girls head ending her life.

But with Chuck, everything was different. Suddenly it wasn't just an assignment or a mission. It was Chuck, it was her, and it was them. She found herself caring about him, worried about him. She found herself thinking about him all the time, wondering what he was doing, if he was thinking about her. And now this with what was happening, she's never been so upset that someone was being hurt in her life, but then again, she's never loved anyone before either.

Her phone rang next to her breaking her thoughts as she looked down at it seeing Casey's scowling face. Calming her emotions she picked it up, waiting for the update on his interrogations, not surprised that he'd be finished by then.

"Walker secure." She said into the phone.

"Casey secure. They're gone." He stated. Sarah was silent for a moment as those two words reverberated around in her head.

"What do you mean they're gone?" She blanched angrily.

"I mean they escaped. They were being transferred from where they were being held to the CIA facility and the truck was ambushed by Fulcrum and they escaped."

Fury raced through Sarah as she listened and she could tell by the tone of his voice how pissed off Casey was about it as well. She couldn't believe they escaped. Now she would have to go after Coleman in order to get to her.

"What is being done about this?" She asked as calmly as possible.

"We have search teams out right now and a bolo for the local police. Larkin is currently going through the computer system and seeing what specifically they did during the time we were here." He answered, pausing for a second. "I'm sure it will go faster with Bartowski here."

Sarah smiled slightly at that, at the veiled compliment and comment of wanting Chuck to come back and be ok. It amazed her how Chuck had been able to get under John Casey's skin, even if the man continued to deny it.

"I'm about twenty minutes away from Chuck. We'll be back as soon as possible." She told him. Casey grunted before replying.

"We can hold down the fort for a bit Walker. Take your time. Just get Bartowski." With that he hung up the phone leaving Sarah alone with her thoughts once more but with a small smile on her face.

Just as she told Casey, twenty minutes later she pulled up into the hotel that Chuck was at and parked the borrowed car. She took a few steady breaths and looked around where she was. The building looked modern but just a little run down, nothing fancy and the area for the most part looked mostly vacant but had some town around. It was a good spot to hide out and Sarah felt pride that Chuck had picked it, especially in whatever frame of mind he would be in.

She grabbed her purse from the seat next to her and exited the car, taking a second to straighten her clothes. She was glad she had the frame of mind, or the not so subtle reminder from Bryce to change out of her night clothes on the plane that she had run out of the hotel in.

She walked towards the check in office and opened the door, she saw a middle aged guy come into the room from the back and stop in his tracks at seeing her there, but quickly recovered and stepped up to the counter.

"May I help you?" He asked, eying her. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes at him, figuring he probably thought she was a prostitute or something.

"Yes, my husband checked in here a few hours ago and he didn't tell me the room number. I tried calling him but he had a migraine and isn't answering his phone." She said sweetly, placing her hands on the counter. "His name is Jake Arlington."

The man nodded and looked at the computer searching for the name she had given him.

"And your name is?" He asked, looking back at her.

"I'm Sandra Arlington." She replied pulling out the ID from her wallet. The man picked it up and eyed it suspiciously before reluctantly handing it back to her. He seemed disappointed to find out she was legit.

"He's in room 215, here is the second key." He handed her the key to the room and she gave him a bright smile and a thanks and headed out.

The sun was beginning to rise now and the sky was beginning to turn brighter. She watched her surroundings, making sure she wasn't followed now that she knew his previous minders and tormentors were out on the loose she went up the stairs and to the room.

She stopped right outside the door and took a few calming breaths. She wanted to go in there all ablaze and protect Chuck, to help him with whatever was wrong. But she knew she had to be calm. After what she saw on the video he would be distraught and upset.

Finally she stepped up to the door and placed her hand on it and knocked gently.

"Chuck?" She said, loud enough to be heard on the inside but soft enough not to disturb the other guests. When she didn't get a reply, something she was expecting and maybe hoping she took the key that was in her hand and gently unlocked the door and pushed it open.

The room was completely dark as she pushed the door opened quietly and looked around seeing the room had been ransacked. Panic coursed through her as she shut the door and turned on the light pulling out her gun. She dropped it immediately however at seeing a tuff of curly hair in the corner of the room opposite her, curled up impossibly small.

She ran over to Chuck, his name on her lips as fell on her knees in front of him in alarm. Her voice seemed to scare him as he curled up tighter and buried his face further into his arms and legs, shying away from the limited light that showed through the room.

"Chuck." She said desperately. Reaching her hand towards his shaking form but he pulled away as far as the wall would let him causing her to stop.

"Please. Don't touch me." His cry muffled by his limbs. Sarah's heart broke. She wanted to reach over to him and hold him tightly, but he didn't want her too and she was at a loss at what to do.

"Please Chuck, I'm here now. Everything will be ok." She whispered to him. He didn't answer her. She moved her legs out from underneath her and sat flat on the floor in front of him, waiting. She hated the waiting but she was willing to do it, for him.

They sat like that for a long time, just silent in each other's company. Sarah took the time to go over what she could see of him, taking in the bruises and welts that were on his skin. The marks of pain and torment that he was obviously going through that didn't show up on camera. They needed a better system. She noted how his Nerd Herd shirt hung loosely on him and how his thick lushes curls that she loved so much were in such disarray.

Tears strayed down her face as she sat there patiently, waiting for Chuck to finally look up so she could see his face, see the warm brown eyes that she loved so much and dreamt about every night since they've been apart. Her arms ached to pull him to her and hold him tightly and place kisses all over his face. To wipe away the tears and pain until he feels nothing but love again.

"Chuck." She said again, trying to get his attention. She didn't quite understand why he wouldn't be throwing himself at her as much as she wanted to do herself. "Please look at me."

She watched his shoulders shake slightly as he took deep breaths but he didn't look up, he didn't move from his curled up position in the corner. She finally reached out her hand to him again, placing it gently on his forearm only to have him jump quickly into the wall, cringing at the loud bang indicating he hit it hard.

"Don't." He said desperately. Sarah let out a huff and scooted closer to him.

"Chuck looked at me." She said softly again. "I know about what happened. I saw the security feed."

Chuck looked up then, staring at her in sorrow and alarm at that. Sarah gasped her hand flying to her mouth again at the sight of the bruises and dried blood on his face that she had somehow missed when watching the feeds. One eye was somewhat swollen shut and blood was still pouring out his nose. She didn't know how he was able to get a hotel room with his appearance as it was and she was wary about the security of the hotel they were currently at.

"I'm so sorry." He cried out, his brows narrowed in pain. She lowered her hand and tried to reach out for him again but he cowered away once more. "Please, please I'm dirty. Filthy. Don't touch me." He begged.

Anger once again coursed through her, fire in her veins burned as she took him in, drank him up. But she closed her eyes and counted to ten, trying to find her calm. There will be time enough for revenge, time enough to make them pay. Right now she needed to take care of Chuck.

"Chuck, its ok. I understand." She said soothingly.

"No you don't!" He yelled at angrily at her, startling her. "You left me. You left me here, with them."

"Oh Chuck. You know I didn't want to." She replied. She felt the tears fall out her eyes faster as her chest hitched. His expression changed from one of anger to sadness once again as he watched her cry. She wasn't sure what to say, how to fix this. They once again sat in silence until the noise of the others staying in the hotel began to sound, breaking them out of their own thoughts.

Chuck looked down at his arm for a few minutes, running his finger over a bruise on his arm. She watched him as he traced it, wanting to grab it and kiss it over and over again until it was better and the bruise was gone. But she resisted. He asked to not be touched and she was going to honor that request as much as she hated it.

"I should probably take a shower." He said softly, not looking at her. Sarah nodded in agreement not trusting her voice quite yet.

They sat for a few more moments before Chuck reluctantly leaned against the wall and used it to help pull him up to his feet. By the way his body cracked and popped as he stood up and how unsteady he was she guess he must have been like that since before he called her. Carefully Chuck stepped around Sarah and headed for the tiny bathroom as Sarah stared at the spot he had just vacated.

"Chuck." She said softly. She felt him stop but not turn to face her. "Take your time. We're going to be here for a while."

Sarah waited until she heard the shower turn on and counted to one hundred in her head before she picked up her phone and dialed Casey's number. She listened numbly as it rang twice and he answered.

"Find them Casey." She said simply, and then hung up.

A/N: There! one more chapter as promised. I'm ALMOST done with another one but its so busy its taken me 2 hours just to type this. Thank you for reading and reviewing.

And also i would like to recommend a fic i just read last night from Shutupnkissme313 called Chuck vs. a Cup of Coffee. It was really an awesome little story and you should all go read it and review it.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Sarah sat on the floor a few minutes longer just listening to the shower in the other room and counting in her head. She had dropped the phone onto the floor after she had called Casey ignoring it as it rang back over and over as Bryce tried to reach her, but she had no desire to talk to him. She had no desire to talk to anyone right now. There were only two things she wanted and that was to fix this thing with Chuck and to kill Agent Mira Coleman.

Her mind ran over scenarios as she sat there, ways she would do it, would killed her, end her, and make her suffer as she had caused Chuck to suffer. Chuck wouldn't want that though, wouldn't want Sarah to go after this agent in revenge, kill her in cold blood. Chuck would want her to forget it, to let someone else deal with her and not get her hands dirty. He believed that karma pays back those who do bad deeds, and she has no doubt that he'll believe that now.

What Chuck didn't know won't hurt him.

With that grim decision made up in her mind Sarah hit ignore on her phone and turned it to vibrate, not wanting it to disturb them again for a while. She got up off the floor, dusting imaginary particles from her legs as she stood up tall and looked around the destroyed room.

Everything was a mess and out of order in disarray. Her first thought as it was when she first entered the room was that someone had ransacked the room but under closer inspection decided that Chuck must have done it, and her gut gave a twinge imagining what his mind was going through when it happened. The video feed had him taking off out of Castle by noon but he didn't call her for about twelve hours later. He was only over an hour outside of Burbank.

With a hitched breath Sarah sat on the edge of the disassembled bed surveying the damage around her and imagined Chuck sitting in the same spot. She could see him in her mind's eye, sitting on the bed, hunched over elbows on his knees, face in his hands. His breathing would be hitched and shoulders shaking as he tried to control all the emotions that would be swirling in him. Eventually the pain would become too much and he would turn on himself, on anything inanimate around him. She could see him destroying the room in a rage, in pain before finally giving up and falling on a heap in the corner where she found him, finally calling her. Finally calling for help.

Closing her eyes she could see it so clearly, the struggle Chuck must have had to finally call her, to tell her that he needs her. She couldn't imagine what would have gone through his mind during that struggle alone before he caved and called out for help. He had been so resolute in his denial that anything was wrong even when faced with her confronting him. He had been so wrapped up in her own safety that he yet again allowed himself to get hurt and for the first time since she got his call she felt anger towards him for being stubborn.

But the feeling was fleeting. She could never stay mad at Chuck, no matter what he did or didn't do. All she would have to do is look into his eyes and know right away how sorry he was that he disobeyed, or did something stupid. But you also see that he would do it again in a heartbeat because he genuinely cared and couldn't let anyone get hurt. And right now was just a prime example.

Obviously General Beckman's plan to keep them all apart in order to trap some Fulcrum agents backfired and now its biting them in the asses, no one more than Chuck. She had so many questions for Beckman, questions that she was determined to find answers for. She was suddenly afraid for Chuck, more than before knowing now that not even the government seemed to care enough about his wellbeing. That they would use him in such a way, and not ensure his safety.

She opened her eyes finally, blinking back a few times to stem back the tears that threatened to overflow as she looked around once more. She tilted her head slightly, still hearing the shower running and wondering how long she should leave him before going in to make sure he was alright. She contemplated it for a moment or two before deciding to tidy up the room while she waited.

Righting the chairs, and cleaning up the broken glass, Sarah place the do not disturb sign on the outside of the door as she made the bed, pulling down the sheets and fluffing the pillows. She was anxious to get back to Burbank, to Castle and begin helping with the search for the escaped Fulcrum agents but she was exhausted, both physically and mentally and she knew that Chuck must be doubly so. They would stay there for a few hours resting, getting their strength back and just pretending the world didn't exist for a little while longer.

Looking at her watch once more she determined he had been in there longer than what she believed the hot water would hold and decided she would go retrieve him. She walked to the bathroom door and leaned gently against it placing her ear to the door to see if any sounds could be heard. Hearing nothing over the sound of the water she gently knocked on the door and called out his name.

No answer came from the other side and if she was honest with herself she really didn't expect one. Knocking once more and then counting to ten she turned the knob, relieved to find it unlocked and opened the door slowly.

"Chuck?" She said entering the bathroom. She was surprised to see no steam surrounding her and the mirror defogged as she walked further in. "I'm opening the curtain Chuck." She warned before curling her fingers around the flimsy excuse of a curtain and slowly pulled it open a bit to get a look inside.

Chuck was sitting on the floor of the tub, hunched up once more letting the water cascade over his head and slide around his body. His skin was completely red from putting the water as hot as it would go, but as Sarah pushed the curtain opened all the way, letting the dim light of the bathroom into the darkened shower stall, her hand felt like she plunged it into the Arctic Ocean as she reached for the knobs to stop the water.

Chuck shivered while she reached for a towel and she cringed as she wrapped it around his shoulders tightly. Grabbing another towel she bunched it in both hands and began running it through his hair quickly trying to soak up all the water from it, becoming frustrated at the low quality of them.

"What were you doing Chuck? You'll catch your death." She scolded lightly as she continued her administrations.

"You…can't...catch your death…being cold and wet." He stuttered shaking his head. His body had begun shaking almost violently as it attempted to get some body heat.

"Come on, let's get you warm." She said softly. She dropped the towel on the floor wrapping the one around his shoulders tighter as she helped guide him to his feet.

She looked down to be sure the towel she had dropped was on the floor for him to step on so he wouldn't slip when she noticed his legs. His long, strong muscled legs that she had spent many times in the past enjoying and loving, the limbs that made him so irresistibly tall were covered in bruises and welts worse than his arms she had spied earlier. It was then she realized why they didn't see any real evidence of any abuse aside from his demeanor.

Red flashed once more behind her as she wrapped a towel around his waist giving him some sense of modesty before she guided him out the door and to the bed. Pushing him gently in front of her she saw what looked like a boot print on his lower back.

"God Chuck. What happened?" She exclaimed softly as she had him sit on the side of the bed. She picked up his bag that was next to her and placed it next to him, digging through it looking for clothes for him to get into.

Chuck didn't pay her any attention; seemingly off in his own world as she helped him put on some boxers and a shirt. He still shook violently from his ice shower while she pushed him gently onto the bed and wrapped the comforter around him tightly. The fast way to warm him up would have been to take off her clothes and hop into the bed with him but as he begun shunning away from her touch once more she nixed the idea.

"We're just going to sleep for a little bit Chuck. We've both been running on empty for a while." Sarah explained to him kicking off her own shoes. She got on the bed on his other side and lay on top of the covers. Placing her hand under her head on her pillow she lay facing Chuck as he stared at the ceiling unseeing.

She took the time to log his features, the new lines on his face, a small scab on his temple. His vacant eyes scared her but at least his nose didn't look broken. Eventually his shivering stopped and his eyes blinked lazily as he turned his head slightly toward her with a furrowed brow.

"Why did this happen?" He asked her so softly she wasn't even sure she heard him. She slightly shook her head, letting out a sniff.

"I don't know Chuck." She replied. Silence once again descended upon the room as they laid there on the hard lumpy bed, listening to the outside world pass them by. Shouting children and adults rummaging around the area making sure they have all their belongings and the slamming of car doors as they drove away, silence still surrounded them.

Her steady heart leapt slightly as Chuck let out a low moan and turned his aching body toward her on his side so he could face her fully. Watching and waiting until he settled she gave him a small smile, surprised when he returned it, causing butterflies in her stomach as it always did.

"What happens now?" He asked her, wrapping the blanket tighter around himself. Sarah bit her lip and thought for a moment her gut telling her what she wanted the next step to be.

But what she wanted, what the government dictated, and what Chuck needed were three separate things entirely. A burning sensation in the pit of her stomach at seeing Chuck's furrowed expression fired on as her mind raced. So many thoughts ran through her mind about where to proceed from there. Her first inkling after the one of going after Coleman herself was to just take Chuck and run. They had money. They had new ID's. She was well versed on how to get away on off grid if she had too.

Sure the government knew where they were at the moment, and she knew they would send every and all available resources to find them, but she felt confident in her skills to get away. To hide. The only problem with that scenario was Chuck. He was hurt, both physically and mentally. Emotionally. He needed help and most of all he needed his friends and family, he needed his life back and all sense of normalcy.

She knew Chuck loved her, he's told her and he would run with her if she asked him too, but she couldn't bring herself to do so. Change was something that Chuck feared the most next to abandonment. It was one of the first things she had learned about him. Why else would a borderline genius still be working at a Buy More five years after being expelled from Stanford? She understood the disappointment he must have felt but the Change in his life crushed his confidence so much he was afraid to change anything else.

In other words, they would be moving a lot and she didn't think he would survive long on the run. And she would never want to put him through that anyways. Or Ellie, whom she considered her first real best friend. Aside from all the spy stuff, she always tried to be as honest with Ellie as possible. She was sure out of everyone in the world other than her bosses, Ellie knew the most real information about her than anyone else, and that thought scared her. But she didn't want to hurt her by taking away her brother.

"I'm not sure Chuck." She told him honestly, not looking away from him. She moved her hand closer to him but didn't touch him despite how much her fingers tingled to do so.

A door slammed nearby causing them both to jump slightly at the sudden sound. She reached for her gun on the nightstand next to her but slumped back onto the bed at seeing no danger. Covering her face with both her hands she counted to ten in her mind again to clear it, laughing internally at how often she seemed to be doing that recently. She felt lost and didn't know what to do, how to fix this, where to go next.

She felt Chuck shift again in the bed and waited for him to settle. Feeling his fingers travel up her arm causing the hairs to rise in their wake, she waited with bated breath as he gently curled his fingers around one of her hands that still covered her face and pulled it down. She tilted her head to gaze over at him on the pillow, seeing the small smile that had been on a few moments before back on.

"I'm really glad you came Sarah." He told her, and she couldn't stop the tears any longer as she curled her body closer to his.

"Oh Chuck." She mumbled, inhaling air into her lungs. "I would always come for you, you know that." releasing her hand he reached up to her cheek and using his thumb wiped away the tears on her face a few times before reaching for her hand again, gripping it tightly as if afraid to let go.

"I know. And I should have called you earlier." He said his chest rising and falling quickly as the emotions over took him again. Closing the distance Sarah finally got her wish and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him close as his features crumbled and his own tears fell faster.

"Chuck."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He sobbed into her neck, breaking her heart even further with each word. "It's all my fault. All of it. My fault."

Sarah lied awake on the lumpy hotel mattress staring up at the ceiling. Her left arm was under Chuck, curled up with her fingers gently running through his now dry hair in a soothing manner; his head lay comfortably on her chest. Her right hand lay across her stomach, fingers entwined with Chucks. She had never felt more comfortable and so worked up at the same time in her entire life.

It had taken a while for Chuck to calm down. He continually repeated blame on himself for the whole thing as she whispered soothing words into his hair until he couldn't cry anymore. Eventually Chuck had fallen into an unsettled sleep curled up with her. She was glad though because he really needed it. He looked so tired.

But Sarah couldn't sleep. In the two hours since he begun dozing Sarah lied wide awake staring at the ceiling with questions and scenarios flying through her mind. She needed to know what happened, what really happened.

"You can ask." His voice said hoarsely, and she startled, not realizing he was awake. He hadn't moved aside from squeezing her fingers. Sarah inhaled a deep breath, holding it in before doing so, not able to keep the questions inside any longer.

"What happened Chuck?" She replied, eyes still focusing on a spot by the ceiling fan, fingers still running through his hair. "Everything."

Chuck lay silent against her for several minutes before finally pulling away and sitting up slowly. She was grateful for the dimness of the room at the moment so she wouldn't have to fully face the horrible vision that was his skin from her neglect. She sat up as well, wincing as her back popped from laying in the same position for hours on end and they both scooted up to sit against the head board.

Chuck wouldn't look at her then, he looked anywhere but. He kept his hands in his lap with the blanket tight around his body effectively cutting himself off from her in a way. And then he told her, everything. About the rules they put on the same day she left. About the punch to the face in Castle when he protested. She made a mental note to reprimand Casey for not watching that day.

He told her about the bruise on his face the first video conference, and about the drives, which until yesterday had been the worst part. He told them about the verbal attacks, the threats. The physical attacks in the car. She refused to turn her head away from him, afraid to close her eyes against him for she didn't want the imagery to be stuck in her head. He stopped when he got to her call the day before, after he melted down in front of Ellie, the next part she knew would be the worst but she needed to know the truth of what happened.

"What happened yesterday?" She asked him, reaching out to take his hand in hers once more. He swallowed hard and Sarah watched his adams apple bob, resisting the urge to lean over to him and place a kiss on it.

"She wanted me to look up-"

"No, not that." She interrupted shaking her head, gripping him tighter. "In the supply room." She prompted.

Chuck released her hand, bringing it up to his face to hide it.

"I didn't want it." His cry muffled behind his hands. "I tried to stop it but…"

"Chuck." She reached out for him but he moved away, getting out of the bed and standing next to it, staring desperately at her.

"You Agents, you're so strong. I pushed her off but she just kept coming at me." He explained. "She took me down and I was out of air and those cuffs we found in there."

"It's ok Chuck." She said soothingly, suddenly not wanting to hear it, but a flash of anger crossed his face.

"No, it's not ok!" He yelled, she was frightened. Not of him, never of Chuck, but afraid of what this anger would do to him.

The silence stretched between them as Chuck stood by the bed breathing heavily. His brows narrowed before they crumpled in defeat as he fought to not look at her. Sarah however couldn't take her eyes off him, was acutely aware of everything about him at that moment and ready to burst into reaction with whatever would happen next.

"What happened Chuck?" She prompted again and he moved away from the bed facing way from her.

"After she knocked the wind out of me she cuffed me she…god Sarah, don't make me say it." He pleaded. Chuck sat heavily on the end of the bed with his back to her.

Horrified is the feeling that shook her bones at finally hearing it. Though she knew the prospect since watching the video on the plane, hearing it aloud, in plain facts from Chuck's mouth finally hit home. So many emotions ran through her at that moment that she didn't know exactly which one she should be feeling as they jumbled up inside of her.

She felt anger that it happened, sadness that it hurt him, horror that she wasn't there to stop it, and betrayal. It made her angry at herself for feeling that. Logically she knew Chuck wouldn't have done anything, that it was against his will but she couldn't stop the feeling and she hated herself for it at that moment.

But seeing Chuck sitting on the end of the bed, back to her, shoulders hunched the feeling dissipated on the spot. She loved Chuck. He loved her. And right now the man that she loved was in pain, and tormented by his own demons from the event and needed her to be on his side.

"I didn't…I couldn't…" He shuttered out sob. "My body just did what it wanted. I tried to stop it, will it to stop but-"

Sarah crawled to the foot of the bed behind him and leaned forward wrapping her arms around him. He struggled for a few seconds before he ceded to her touch. She closed her eyes for a moment, laying her cheek on his shoulder and placing a soft kiss on the side of Chuck's neck. She felt him shudder and she didn't know if it was from repulsion of her touch or from the enjoyment of them being together again.

"Did she, well, use…"

"Oh god." He moaned once again covering his eyes with his hands. "Oh god oh god oh god. What if she gave me something?"

"We'll get you tested." She said firmly, pulling his hands away from his face again. Even bruised and battered she still wanted to see him. He was still the most handsome man she's ever set her eyes on.

"What if….Sarah what if she gets pregnant?" He said softer and dread ran down her spine. But she turns his head to face her and she maneuvers her body so she can fully look into his eyes, his soft brown eyes that are so compassionate.

"We will deal with that if it comes." She said firmly, her gaze never wavering. He tried to say something else but she wouldn't let him. Come hell or high water she'll be with him through all this, even if the worse thing imaginable, at least for her, and probably for him as well comes true.

Her phone buzzed on the table next to the bed and she sat up reluctantly to answer it, but not before giving Chuck one more comforting squeeze on his shoulder. Crawling up the bed she landed on her stomach reaching out for the phone and let out an annoyed sigh at seeing Morgan's face smile up at her.

"Hey Morgan." She answered. Chuck turned around to look at her as she rolled onto her back giving him a smile.

"Sarah, I have bad news." He started and Sarah rolled her eyes.

"Morgan-"

"No, please let me speak." There was a pause on the other side. "I lost Chuck." He said morosely.

"No, Morgan he-"

"I'm sorry Sarah. We, that is my lovely lady Anna and I searched everywhere."

"It's ok, he's – "

"The beach, his house, the cage, the playground. We even searched the arcade to which I'm proud to inform you I am official top scorer of DDR at the moment."

"That's great Morgan but-"

"I know! I can't wait to tell Chuck if I can find him. He never came home and he's not answering his cell."

"He's here Morgan." She said exasperated.

"Should I alert Ellie? I haven't yet but if he doesn't show soon…."

"Morgan, for the love of….Chuck's here. With me. I have him." She said louder. Silence ensued on the other end of the line as Sarah scooted over to make room for Chuck as he crawled up to lay next to her.

"Hey Buddy." He said into the phone as Sarah put it on speaker phone.

"Chuck! Where have you been? We've been worried!." Morgan exclaimed his voice going higher. Sarah watches Chuck close his eyes as he bit his lip, but didn't respond.

"I was on my way home Morgan and we met up. We'll be back later." She told him, not waiting for a reply she hung up the phone and roll to look at Chuck. "Chuck, talk to me." She said softly and he opened his eyes.

"I don't think I can go back." He told her and her brow furrowed in confusion.

"Chuck you have to. There's no way Beckman will let you go. And what about Ellie? Morgan?" She said and Chuck just shook his head looking away from her.

"That's just it Sarah. I…how can I go back home and just pretend nothing's happened? That the last few weeks never existed? That I'm ok when I'm not."

Sarah wasn't sure what to say again, something she was hating more and more. She never seemed to know what it is that Chuck needs to hear and it hurt her to see him in so much pain. She wished, not for the first time that she had his skill of words. That she could understand a situation and say the words to another person to make things better. But she didn't. That was his skill and right now, he couldn't use it on himself, and it was causing him pain.

"What do you want to do?" She asked him, bending her elbow on the bed and laying her head in her palm. She placed her left hand on his chest and gently began drawing random images over his shirt with her finger.

Chuck reached over and grabbed the finger, holding it tight causing her to look up and meet his eyes. She fought the urge to not grimace as she'd been doing at seeing the bruises, at least his nose looked fine, but it still looked horrible and she felt so much rage at seeing them. But she gave him her attention.

"I don't know Sarah. But, I can't lie to Ellie. Not about this." His breathing became erratic and he clinched his eyes closed tight as the tears began falling again. Doing the only thing she could she wrapped her arms around him, shielding him from the world as he cried out his pain.

"I understand Chuck. We'll come up with something. I promise you." She whispered into his hair.

A/N: ok guys hope you enjoyed it. Next one is...whenever. Updates will be sporatic till mid-june. (some one please please use a time turner.) I think I'm done abusing Chuck in this story, though there will be plenty of action. Thank you for reviewing! And thanks to charahkids for not giving up on me! As always you are welcome to stalk me on twitter or facebook. (or tumblr which is where i'm at right now instead of writing the next chapter. Oops.)

**charahkids:** I get goosebumps when I write and really really cold. Kinda weird. Random fact about me.

**wilf2:** I understand :)

**Nomadic Nerd:** Thanks! If i'm not ripping someones emotions around I'm not doing a good job. My poor Chuckles. I'll give him a happy ending eventually.

**sevenre:** I quite liked that story from them, i'm reading their other one right now Chuck vs Ellie. Sarah will get her revenge. I've already written some of it though its a few chapters away.

**phathead01:** Thank you for your kind words! I'm glad you are really enjoying it.

**knightrid3r:** I like to think she wouldn't either but Sarah has proven that she had in the past done just about anything and everything that was ordered of her, and I would believe that would include the girl.

**Wade1978:** I agree I did. I really kinda pushed the limit here with what people will accept apparently. I figured Bryce would, because as he said in a previous chapter, Chuck may not think of him as his best friend anymore but he still thought of Chuck as his and would always be there for him. I like Beckman personally but yes, she'll get a nice talking to.

**Neale:** I don't think there are typical reactions for a guy or a girl who gets raped. Both are violated in the worst ways and no one can really attest to how a person would act or react to it. And hopefully one never has to find out either.

**Shutupnkissme313:** No problem! I quite enjoyed your story and I think others will too. Its horrible what happened to him, and the act is horrible to begin with. I didn't feel the need to go in depth with it. It wasn't essential.

**phnxgrl:** Gives her more reason to hunt them down.

**Guest:** I hope you read this but you are right. I agree with everything you posted. Its one of the most underreported crimes out there so just because the numbers are low for men doesn't mean it doesnt happen. I hope i'm presenting it in a realistic yet respectful manner.

**batty02:** lol, thanks for the suggestion. Ellie will be involved soon.

**uplink2:** YAY! I'm glad you did!


	13. Chapter 13

FINALLY! chapter 13. Thank you charahkids for being my beta!

Chapter 13

Sarah gave a sigh of relief as she saw the sign on the side of the freeway indicating they were finally almost home to Burbank. The thought startled her for a moment as she played the word in her mind. She'd never really thought of any place as home, always being on the run or on missions but somehow being in Burbank with Chuck and Ellie felt like what she had always imagined it would be like. Even as she lived in a hotel room it was the longest she'd ever been in one place and she was constantly agitated by how she came to accumulate so many possessions. Regardless it had been a long night and a longer drive and she was just looking forward for it to end so she could spend time with Chuck and sort out everything.

Chuck was silent and had stared blankly out the window, curled up in the passenger seat against the door as far away from her as possible during the long trip. Giving a glance in his direction, his arms wrapped around his knees that were up by his chin, she knew she had made the right decision on which car to drive back, even if she did hate leaving her precious Porsche in Barstow until the retrieval team could get it. But the car was small in comparison to someone of Chuck's stature and very cramped after long periods of time, even if he was still making himself as small as possible.

"We're almost there." She said, breaking the silence. Chuck didn't give any indication that he heard her, head still lying atop his knees turned towards the passing scenery. She hoped he was sleeping and not just letting his thoughts run around his head. He still looked exhausted even after the restless naps they had taken after she arrived. It wasn't enough and she wasn't even sure if it counted as sleep.

They drove on for several more miles, letting the silence permeate in the car. It wasn't uncomfortable exactly, but it was weird to Sarah. She was used to Chuck's endless babbling. She never really knew or understood half of what he would say, but it was comforting in its consistency and she enjoyed that it filled the air with something other than stifling silence at times. It was considered normal. The silence for the past two hours unnerved her slightly but she didn't want to pressure him into anything. He's had enough of that lately and she wasn't quite sure exactly how to handle whatever would come out if she were honest with herself.

She couldn't believe how much everything had changed in such a short amount of time. It had been barely three weeks since she left him, her mind still reeling and dreaming of that last night with him before leaving on the mission. She still felt a small smile cross her lips everything she remembered that he had slipped that piece of paper in her fingers as she walked on the plane. She still had it, stashing it in a small nook on the brace that held her knives to her thigh. He was sad then when they parted, but he had a smile as he said goodbye. If only she had known what would come about by leaving him that day. That only a short time later everything would be destroyed.

"Where are we going first?" Chuck's voice crossed to her. She stopped from visibly cringing at the sound of it, hearing the strain from both the lack of use and the over use of it, glad she wasn't there to witness the latter. The destruction of the room was hard enough for her to deal with; she wasn't sure how she'd handle the raw emotions he had most likely displayed at the time. Sarah glanced in his direction, taking her eyes off the road for a second to see his face turned towards her, leaning against his knees that he still hugged tight. It looked terribly uncomfortable especially with the seatbelt but Chuck didn't seem show any discomfort.

"We need to go to Castle. Report to Beckman." She told him. She saw Chuck nod his head slightly before burying his face in his knees. She knew he was worried about having to relieve it all. To have to report to Beckman what had been going on.

"I'm so going to a bunker aren't I?" He asked her impassively. Sarah shook her head, before voicing her answer.

"No Chuck. You aren't." She told him firmly, remembering the Generals comments about such an option after seeing how he seemed to fade just by being partially held. But he didn't seem to believe her as he lifted his head from his knees to stare once more out the window.

"It would be for the best you know. Lock me away where nobody will get to me. Keep the Intersect safe."

"Is that what you want?" She glanced. Chuck shrugged his shoulders slightly.

"Does it really matter what I want? It's never mattered before, the evidence of what happened speaks for itself. I need constant protection as I can't take care of myself. I'm a danger to everyone around me. I doubt my opinion will matter now. "He said despondently. "But if I were Beckman-"

Sarah turned on her signal and pulled off to the side of the empty road coming to a complete stop. The seatbelt locked along her body as she pressed hard on the breaks. Wincing slightly at the pain as she unbuckled her belt, she ignored the stings as she roughly turned off the engine and stared off at the distance for the moment. In her peripheral she saw Chuck try to steady himself, shaking slightly as he brought his legs back up in front of him as they had fallen off the seat during her rough turn, banging hard on the dash in front of him.

She felt a moment of guilt at doing that, remembering what he told her of his recent trips in the car but she shook that off. She would never hurt him, and she wanted to believe that despite how hurt he was now, that Chuck would know that without a doubt. Turning her body as best she could to face him she watched him with narrowed eyes as he breathed heavily and looked around at anything but her. She waited patiently until his eyes finally met hers.

Ignoring his shaking form she reached over across the center and grabbed ahold of his hand, holding it tightly in her own as much as she dared pulling it towards her and into her lap. He watched her warily and her heart ached at seeing the fear in his eyes that he was fighting down.

"I'm sorry." He stumbled faintly, his eyes focused entirely on their hands. Sarah shook her head, bringing his hand up to her lips and placing a soft kiss on the knuckles before lowering it again.

"No Chuck, I'm sorry." She blurted as she tried to control the emotions that have been threatening to overflow. "I knew this was a bad idea. I knew…" The tears began falling as all the stress and worry of the past weeks came crashing onto her at once.

She couldn't stop them anymore, couldn't put them on hold for a more appropriate time. She bent towards him placing their joined hands against her forehead as she sobbed out her own pain and misery of feeling she failed him so horribly. She hated this feeling of not knowing what to do, never having an encounter like this before. She never cared for anyone before like she did for Chuck, never had anyone she cared about who hurt in a way that made her lost and confused as to what steps to take to make it better. All she had felt was anger and shock but now she just felt the overwhelming frustration of everything.

She felt Chuck place his other hand on the back of her head, gently brushing the strands away from her face that were mixing with her tears. It was comforting and soothing and just like Chuck. His world had been turned upside down and had been subjected to who knows what and here he was comforting her.

She felt his warmth as he leaned over her, placing his cheek on the back of her head his warm breath tickling on her scalp as he took in her scene and wrapping his free arm around her securely. She felt safe, comforted, but most of all she felt loved. She felt his love for her and tears came harder. She loved him so much and never told him, yet he freely gives himself to her without a second thought.

They stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, but eventually her mind reminded her that they had someplace to be. They couldn't stay in the car forever curled up comforting themselves and each other. She struggled for a few moments with the weight of Chuck on top of her, not wanting to move but a sting in her back indicated that she had been folded for too long. The tears had eventually slowed until they stopped completely, leaving her drained and exhausted, soft whimpers escaping her throat. She hadn't let go of Chucks hand the entire time, but his palms weren't clammy and she let a small smile escape her lips as she started to sit up that she hadn't freaked him out.

Her back cracked as she sat straighter and she brushed her hair out of her face with her other hand before looking over at him. His eyes were soft and moist, questioning and full of worry. She gave him a shy smile which he returned. His fingers lightly danced on the side of her cheek, wiping away the stray moisture there as he tucked her loose strands behind her ear.

"I love you." She blurted out. This wasn't how she wanted to tell him but the feelings inside of her were welling up in her chest, making it hard for her to breath, bursting to get out. Chuck didn't react at all aside from the small smile that was still plastered upon his bruised face as he gazed deeply into her own eyes seeing her soul.

"I know." He said simply and her heart fluttered. Of course he did. It wasn't much of a surprise to him. She knew anyone else would feel sadness at his lack of expression at her words, the three words she knew he longed to hear from her. The words he'd said many times to her and always took her breath away. But she didn't. She felt light and free. That despite her lack of words, her lack of ability to tell him, he still knew what was in her heart, and knowing that just made her love him even more.

She leaned forward halfway to Chuck, letting him meet her there, giving him the choice as she placed a kiss on his lips. Her first one since she found him in the hotel room. Currents coursed through her as his tongue requested entrance and she finally let go of his hand as she brought both of hers to the sides of his face deepening the kiss. Chucks arms wrapped around her body, bringing her as close to him as they could manage in a in a the front seat of the rented car as Sarah's fingers traced up his skin and pushing the hair that flopped on his forehead back, curling to take hold of them in her fists gently.

They pulled apart a few moments later as their lungs burned for fresh oxygen. She licked her lips still tasting him and the bitter coffee he had consumed before they took off, as she breathed heavily and leaned over still resting her forehead on his. She kept her eyes closed as his warm breath fought with hers as they tried to get their heart rates back to normal.

"You'll be safe Chuck." She said finally and he pulled away slightly much to her disappointment, but she could see his eyes and the confusion mixed in with his love for her. "I won't let anyone take you."

"Sarah its-"

"No!" She interrupted. She reached out her hands to once more place them on either side of his face, forcing his attention fully on her. "Listen to me Chuck. No matter what happens I will not let anyone take you. I will not let them hurt you anymore. I will always protect you." She declared. Chuck placed his hands on top of hers and lowered them down between them with a sad smile.

"You can't promise me that Sarah." He said softly. But Sarah vehemently denied that she couldn't.

"The hell I can't Chuck. It's you and me."

"If Beckman choses to put me in a bunker-"

"Then I will be there to break you out." She argued, turning in her seat indicating the conversation was over.

Sarah sat up straight and put her seatbelt back on, wincing slightly as the strap hit where she had gotten stung with it before, finally realizing how hard she really hit the break. She looked over at Chuck apologetically as he too put his seatbelt on and they began their way back to Burbank again.

Silence descended upon the car again, neither sure exactly what to say at her proclamation. Sarah was determined to keep that promise; there was nothing else for her but that. Chuck didn't belong in a bunker and she would never let anyone hurt him ever again. He was the sweetest kindest man in the world and she was determined to keep him happy, to keep him safe, from anyone and anything that would try to hurt him. Even himself she thought grimly.

About ten minutes into the drive, eyes focused straight ahead focused intently on the road in front of her, Sarah jumped slightly as Chuck reached over the dash and grabbed her right hand from the wheel. Giving it a gentle squeeze he sat back in his seat and stared back out the passenger side window. Sarah didn't let go the remainder of the trip.

"Do I have to go in there?" Chuck asked dreadfully as he stared up at the Orange Orange. They had finally pulled up about ten minutes previous but Chuck had yet to release her hand and so they've sat in the car in silence as he stared up at the building. Sarah looked over at him bleakly, knowing there was no way around it.

"Yeah, we do Chuck." She said. "But it's going to be ok. I'm with you." With that she unlocked her seat belt and leaned over giving him a kiss on the cheek before exiting the car.

She stood next to the vehicle as Chuck slowly got out and then walked around the front to reach for his hand again. He gave her a small smile of appreciation while she dragged him towards the door. Sarah used her keys to get inside the yogurt shop before stepping out of the sunny California sun. The shades were drawn, as they had been for weeks making the place look dark and abandoned and Sarah held back an internal groan at thinking about all the cleaning she would have to do.

"Come on." She said tugging his hand. Chuck followed slowly, practically dragging his feet as they went around the counter. "You want some yogurt?" She asked stopping mid step and turning towards him.

Chuck eyes went wide and he shook his head quickly, eyes searching around the place as if expecting something to jump out at him. Sarah's eyes narrowed at his reaction and released his hand to grab a cup from one of the cupboards.

"I swear, if they ruined frozen yogurt for you I'm not only going to kill them, I'm going to bring them back to do it again."

"Sarah!" Chuck said horrified as she filled the large cup with strawberry yogurt before opening the glass case holding the toppings.

"What?" She shrugged. "You like frozen yogurt. Sometimes it's the only thing we can get you to eat when you get started on some electronics or computer problem. Remember last year? You lost 15lbs on that computer hacking case? Ellie about threw a fit! Now eat." She handed him the cup and he took it tentatively.

"You do know this is all sugar right? I don't think gummy worms count as actual food." He teased picking up a worm and dangling it at her. Sarah laughed as she squirmed away from it, not wanting to get frozen yogurt all over her face.

"Yeah well, we haven't gotten any fruit in since I left so you'll have to live off sugar till we get you some real food." With that she picked up a spoon and got a scoop from the bowl and lifted it to Chuck's mouth. He pursed his lips for a second in rebellion before a glare from Sarah caused him to relent and open his mouth. She left the spoon in his mouth and patted him on the head. He snagged the spoon from his mouth and ducked his head down to her capturing her lips, sharing the fruity flavor of the frozen treat for a moment before he pulled back again.

"Thank you." He said simply and walked around her to get into Castle leaving Sarah in a momentary haze.

All the lights in Castle were on brightly as they descended the stairs. Chuck took the steps slowly with Sarah following close behind but still giving him space. She could see his muscles tense up as he hit the bottom and watched as he looked around the room, as if expecting to see the other Agents there.

Once again anger flashed through her. This was their Castle, their safe zone from the dangers of the spy world. He was supposed to be safe in there from everything, but he wasn't. She was beginning to see he wasn't truly safe anywhere and it caused her chest to ache at that.

"Bartowski, I see you're doing well." Casey said entering the main area. Bryce looked up from his computer console reminding Sarah of his presence and she suddenly felt panic as he stood up and approached them. She had forgotten in all her haste to get to Chuck and everything afterword's that he was here, and she wasn't sure how Chuck would take his former friend who had sent the Intersect to him creating all these problems, as well as her former lover being here. He said he was fine, that he trusted Sarah not to break his heart which considering it was Bryce Larkin, the douchbag friend from hell it was a big risk as it was, but he was on the emotional edge at the moment and she stepped up in front of him, ready to shield him from anything.

Bryce stepped up in front of her, ignoring her presence as he took in Chuck ragged appearance. Even with the clean blue jeans and the maroon long sleeved shirt Chuck was wearing it was still easy to tell that he had gone through a very hard time recently. The clothes she had picked out and left in the car in the event that they had to run at a moment's notice seemed big and loose on him, hanging off him like elephant skin. She would have to work on fattening him up again.

"Chuck, you look like shit." Bryce commented. Sarah reached her fist out and punched him the shoulder enjoying that groan of pain he gave as she glowered at him.

"Always the smooth one Larkin." Casey grunted rolling his eyes. Sarah glanced at Chuck behind him who had his eyes downcast, yogurt forgotten as he picked at the cuffs of the shirt with his free hand.

Bryce rubbed his shoulder and glared at Casey before turning back to Sarah and Chuck.

"Sorry, just trying to be honest. Thought you'd appreciate it." He stated. But before Sarah could punch him again Casey came up behind him and grabbed him by the cuff of his neck and dragged him into the conference room roughly.

"Beckman's waiting." He said simply.

Sarah gave Chuck one last glance, running her hand up and down his arm in a soothing manner before taking his hand and pulling him towards the conference room. He dragged his feet again, obviously not wanting to go in but resigned that he didn't have a choice in the matter.

"It'll be fine Chuck. I'm here with you." She said soothingly as the entered.

General Beckman was already on the large screen, sitting forward against her desk with her hands in front of her. She had her typical stern frown that was always present on her face that typically meant something bad was about to happen but all Sarah could see was red. This woman was in complete control of Chuck and his wellbeing and she had dropped the ball on it and Chuck had been hurt.

"Good evening team, Agent Larkin. It's good to see you're alright Mr. Bartowski" She stated once they all sat at the table. Sarah's eyes narrowed at the woman on the screen as Bryce scoffed.

"Alright? With all due respect General do you see him?"

"Bryce!"

"Shut it Larkin"

Casey and Sarah responded at the same time. Bryce sat back in his chair and shrugged crossing his arms in front of his chest, not concerned in the least. General Beckman pursed her lips annoyed at the interruption and probably the insinuation that was in Bryce's accusation. But Sarah didn't really care. She didn't approve of Bryce's comment in front of Chuck, calling him out, putting him in the crosshairs but he was right. He wasn't alright. He was far from it.

"Yes, I am well aware of that. I apologize Mr. Bartowski for the way this op was handled. But you are safe now in the hands of your handlers and we shall continue on. If you would Mr. Bartowski, share with us what it is that Agent Coleman was having you search for yesterday." She said putting on her glasses and opening the file in front of her.

Nothing came from Chuck, and Sarah looked over at him. He was sitting next to her on her right with Casey on his other side but he wasn't paying attention to the screen at all. One hand held the cup of melted strawberry yogurt while the other one held the spoon loosely and stirred it, lifting it slightly every now and then to watch the sugary liquid slip off the spoon and into the cup below it.

"Mr. Bartowski?" The General asked again, with slightly less patience. Again he ignored her, preferring his cup of goo.

Sarah reached over; placing her hand on top of his arm to gain his attention and gently took the snack away before Casey could grab it out of annoyance. Chuck looked over at her meeting her gaze and she tipped her head towards the general who had taken her glasses off once more with furrowed brows.

"Sorry, General." Chuck croaked out, sitting up in his chair and placing his hands in his lap under the table, to which Sarah snuck her own hand over and grabbed hold of his left one.

"Please pay attention Mr. Bartowski. What did Agent Coleman ask you to do?" She repeated.

"She uh, was looking for Bryce." He stated, glancing across the table at where Bryce sat, obviously not surprised. "I looked up his file on that database and it said he was deceased, but she believes it to be a lie and that he was hidden in some other file."

"She would be right." Bryce commented.

"I followed any and all leads and believe I may have been close a couple of times but she didn't see it. It didn't deter her though, she still believes Bryce is out there but she believed that I really did try to find him." He reported absently. He never looked up at the screen and his not referring to Coleman by her name was not lost on Sarah. She gave him a reassuring look that he didn't see with his eyes focused so intently on a spot that was on the table.

"So you're saying that Agent Larkins cover is still intact then?" She reiterated and Chuck nodded. "Good, what else did Agent Coleman talk to you about?"

"Nothing really, just that her partner was involved as well. The way she spoke, they really believe in what they're doing. They really believe Bryce is the enemy. That the CIA is the enemy." Chuck looked up then for a moment before turning his gaze back down.

They had encountered many Fulcrum Agents over the year but Sarah realized this was the first time that Chuck had actually spoken to one, actually heard them speak of their beliefs even if Agent Coleman was misrepresenting who the enemy was. It was something she never really experienced but Sarah could only imagine how it must feel for Chuck. He lived until the Intersect in the normal world, with normal people, living a normal life. Like everyone else terrorists and enemy agencies were a world away, something you watched on television and judged in your own view, or in video games where you listen to the bad guy spout his crap right before you kill him.

However Chuck's world had gotten shaken again she realized. He had sat in this very room with the enemy and listened to her as she sprouted her beliefs, genuinely believing that the CIA was the bad guys in this scenario. Sarah wished she could read Chucks mind, wished that she could know what he was thinking. He was usually easy to read but since she's gotten back he had been closed up, locked away in his own pain, his own thoughts.

"We suspected as much." The General said nodding her head and sitting back in her seat. "Despite the negative things that had happened in the past few weeks, this mission has been a success."

"A success?" Sarah growled out?

"With that I expect you three to resume normal operations. We have agents out already searching for both Coleman and Leyan and you three are to focus your attentions elsewhere."

"You think this was a success?" Sarah interrupted again to which Beckman glowered at her.

"With that take a few days and go over every inch of Castle to make sure they didn't leave anything behind that could compromise the operation. Any questions?"

Sarah was stunned. That was a mild term, the only one that would pop in her head. She was livid. The General was just pushing off everything that has happened aside and declaring it all a success when it was anything short of a complete disaster. She stood up in her chair, and placed her hands on the table staring directly at Beckman.

"Chuck, please leave." She said quietly. Chuck looked up then glancing between Sarah and the General for a moment before turning to Casey who she was glad gave a slight tip of his head backing her up. Chuck just nodded and stood up slowly from his chair, wincing slightly from his sore body before turning and heading upstairs and out of earshot.

"What is the meaning of this Agent Walker?" The General inquired angrily, the crow's feet of her brow deepening. Sarah stood up straight.

"I apologize General but how could this be a success? Our team was divided under false pretenses and your asset was in the hands of enemy agents for three weeks." Her tone was hostile.

"Agent Walker the particulars of the mission was not information you needed." The General said.

"With all due respect General we're just worried about the asset, as it is our job. Perhaps a little more information such as why were we sent across the country if you just wanted to track a few Fulcrum agents." Casey inquired standing up next to Sarah. The General gave a sigh and sat forward again eying each of them warily before speaking.

"We knew that Agents were casing the area, specifically you two. We sent you to Maryland because you were being tracked, or so we believed. Turned out you weren't but we couldn't be sure." She explained.

"Why Larkin? We don't have exactly have a great history." Casey glowered over at Bryce who just gave him a huge grin.

"Because he already knew about Bartowski and I wanted you two to keep an eye on him, something that you failed at. It would be difficult to explain to agents not read in on the project why you were there and why you had such contact and monitoring to an asset in California."

"Excuse me?" Sarah shouted.

"But despite everything the higher powers declared this successful. We tracked everything they did in Castle using the latest technology available and we now have the names, numbers, and identities of several dozen Fulcrum agents."

"And Chuck was hurt in the process." She argued.

"I assure you Agent Walker we took his safety into consideration hence the new secure room. The Joint chiefs are impressed with his work in that regard and are putting into consideration bringing him on full time."

"Is this a joke?" Sarah said incredulous to which the General raised one of her perfectly sculptured brows.

"I beg your pardon Agent Walker?"

"Chuck was raped!" She shouted at the screen loudly, throwing her arms up exasperated.

"Agent Walker, Sarah, I understand-"

"No, you don't General. That's the problem." She told her. "You see him as just an asset, as a computer. You treat him like a piece of government property but he's not. He's human, with a family and with friends and you left him unprotected with the enemy. He has no training for this. He never signed up for this. "

The room was deadly silent as the Agents stared at their leader on the screen who was taking deep breaths trying to calm herself. Sarah wasn't going to back down from this however. The General had to know what had happened and she needed to understand to prevent it from happening again. Chuck's life was in her hands.

"General, what Agent Walker is trying to point out and badly is that you've said yourself that Bartowski is one of the most important pieces of intelligence in the country. And we're both concerned that perhaps the government isn't doing enough to protect it. We all dropped the ball on this one, and we have to correct it." Casey intoned somberly.

The General eyed them silently for several moments, obviously thinking. Sarah's heart beat faster as her mind replayed Casey's words. It meant a lot to her that he would back her up on this, that he wasn't going to sit idly by and let her fight for Chuck on her own. They were a team, a damn good one and they needed to stick together.

The General finally sighed again and looked at the two Agents who stood before her, completely ignoring the 3rd one as he sat to the side in his own chair, not saying a word.

"What are you proposing"? She inquired.

A/N: I told you all I'd be back. I never abandon a fanfic. In case you get extra bored I wrote a little oneshot drama/friendship thing called Chuck Vs. The Cupcake that's posted. Feel free to read and review that one. its more of an observational piece i thinks. Thank you all who have read and even more to those who reviewed.

wilf21: Glad you liked it! it'll be more drama/romance/comfort than angst from hereon out.

Wade1978: Nothing a lot of therapy can't cure.

sevenre: Well hopefully this chapter answered a couple of them! :-d

Batty02: Some very good ideas you gave! some may actually get used.

phathead01: I am too. I'm always interested in the emotional side of things. I'm not really an action type person. my eyes usually glaze over and i start skipping.

Nomadic Nerd: I'm glad you seem to be enjoying it. I think when someone you love is put into such a situation they're not the only victim. (though the most important) Though they aren't the ones who was actually violated it does spread and hurt those around them. I think in a situation like this it would be very hard for someone like Chuck who is none-violent. I don't doubt in some way he'd be able to fight off the Agent or at least annoy her enough to make her stop but being the kind of guy he is, he wouldn't want to hurt her even when she's hurting him. That makes no sense but it does.

Shutupnkissme313: Ohhhh don't give up on me yet. I may still surprise you.

ReaganCaseyFan: Thank you for your review. Don't worry I ALWAYS finish my stories. Its just busy for me till mid June. Chuck and Sarah have some healing to do...and then the ass kicking will begin. You're welcome for the none descript. Its horrible enough to think of, I don't feel it's essential to the story to go into details about it. And you're right, everyone around the person is also affected. Its so sad. Now I feel horrible. I'll just have to give him a happy ending.


	14. Chapter 14

Ah, Yet another. Thank you charakids for being my beta. And reminding me this morning that I should probably get this out. Personal thanks at the bottom.

Chapter 14

Chuck sat curled up on one of the benches in the back corner of the dining room at the Orange Orange. He wasn't quite sure how long exactly he'd been sitting there but by the way his backside ached slightly from the hard surface it rested on he would wager a fair bit of time. It was still dark in the room, not feeling like letting the sun in by opening the blinds. The darkness seemed more comforting to him for the moment, inviting. As if it were telling him it understood him and that it would hide him for as long as he needed.

At the moment he felt like that could be forever. He could sit in the darkened corner forever and just melt into the background. It was what he actually preferred right now. He knew on the other side of the curtain the sun still showed brightly as it began its decent into the west and he didn't feel apart of the light any longer. Chuck could hear the people outside the door walking by, laughing, talking, interacting with each other and the environment around them but Chuck felt distant to them now. He felt like he didn't belong. Something inside of him changed and the once bright and opened Chuck wanted nothing more than to seep into the wall behind him and hide in the shadows.

His body stiffened as he heard familiar voices in the distance. Holding his breath Chuck tilted his head slightly to the right for a moment before his mind connected the dots and he curled in impossibly tighter into himself at the sound of his friends and co-workers voices carrying across the parking lot as they left the Buy More. His heart sped up in sudden fear that they would come in, that they would see him and know that he was different. That they would see what had happened and would laugh, would mock, would be disgusted with him as much as he was of himself.

The fear didn't dissipate as they got ever closer to the door of the Orange Orange and Chuck stared at the door knob in fear, his heart beating wildly in his chest as he waited with bated breath for them to come up to the door and turn the knob.

But it never happened.

The laughing voices of his friends came muffled through the door as they walked in front of it but passed it by, probably on to the pizza joint a few stores down he realized as his lungs begged for breath. He granted it with one deep inhale before holding it in until it burned and he couldn't do it any longer letting it out again.

He was safe, of course he was. The Orange Orange was closed, had been for three weeks. Chuck hadn't told Morgan earlier that he was coming back today and therefore Morgan would have no reason to come there to find him.

A cloud drifted lazily over the setting sun, making the room only slightly dimmer as if it were blanketing him with a soft pat telling him everything was alright. But it wasn't and he knew it. He knew he would have to eventually face his friends, his co-workers. He would have to go back to the Buy More probably the next day, and he would have to pretend nothing happened and everything was fine even as everything inside of him screamed at him otherwise.

Chuck wished he was still in the hotel at Barstow.

The slight hiss from the freezer opening caused Chuck to jump slightly, once again causing him to curl up tight. This time however he closed his eyes, not wanting to see who it was that had come up from Castle. He couldn't remember what he was supposed to be doing, what instructions he'd been giving and in turn it caused panic to rise further into his chest. Punishment was swift and cruel. He just wanted to go home.

"Chuck?" A soft voice drifted towards him as he squelched his eyes tightly shut ignoring it. He didn't hear anything else for a moment until a loud squeak left him at the feeling of a hand on his shoulder.

Chuck opened his eyes after hitting the back of the bench hard, hearing a loud thud to look over to his right to see Sarah standing there with her hand outstretched and her eyes moist with concern. He calmed his heart, taking a couple deep breaths before gulping and giving her a weak smile.

"Sorry. Was lost in my head." He croaked out. He saw Sarah just nod her head weakly at his excuse before pulling out a chair at the table beside him and sitting down. He turned his eyes away from her, not able to handle the look she was giving as he stared once again at the door, this time wishing someone would enter now so he didn't have to deal with whatever came next.

They sat in silence for several moments, just listening to the sounds of the outside world. The awkward feeling that and permeated the room a few moments ago dissipated into a comfortable silence as Chuck let his mind wander away from there here and now, only to be brought back but Sarah reaching her hand across the table. Chuck looked down at it but didn't remove his own hands that were wrapped tightly around his hunched up legs. For some reason his mind felt suddenly detached and the hand she held out to him seemed foreign to him.

"Chuck." She said again, causing his eyes to move from her fingers that danced lightly in the air back to her face. "What are you thinking?" She asked curiously.

Chuck narrowed his brows at that, letting the question bound around in his skull. But for some reason it didn't connect the way it should and that worried him slightly, but one look back at Sarah caused clarity to come back and his mind was blissfully blank again. He shook his head, no answer to give her. Sarah lifted her hand from the table and ran it through her hair on the top before letting out her own sigh.

"Are you ready to go?" She asked him. He glanced towards the door once more before looking at her again.

"Where are we going?" He asked softly. Sarah stood up from the chair she was in and reached her hand out once more for him to take, waiting patiently as Chuck stared at it once more.

"To the hospital." She said simply and Chuck vehemently shook his head and tried to back further into the corner.

"I'm not going to the hospital." He stated firmly. He hated the hospital, always had. It was the one thing he never understood about his sister and her dream to be a doctor. To him the hospital reeked of tragedy and sickness blended with antiseptic and bleach. He hated going to the hospital even if it was just to have lunch with his sister. He didn't like to see the people milling about waiting for medical help, didn't like the doctors who walked around ignoring everyone and speaking in some kind of code he could never grasp. The hospital was huge and intimidating, easy to get lost in, to be forgotten. It was the last place he wanted to be at the moment.

"Chuck, we have to. Beckman's orders." She said sadly. "I know you don't want to go." She stated understanding, but still held her hand out for him to take. They stayed in that dance for several minutes with Sarah waiting for him to take her hand and Chuck resolutely ignoring it in favor of staring at nothing in particular. But Sarah was not one to back down, something he loved about her unconditionally, except in this instance.

Sarah moved the table that hugged his side like a shield, protecting him from anything that would come out from his right, except apparently Sarah Walker. Once it was out of her way she reached both hands down this time grabbing both of his and tugging him up but he refused to budge and he ripped his larger hands from hers and tried to shy away.

"Damn it Sarah, I said I wasn't going to go. Leave me alone!" He shouted angrily at her, but seeing the hurt in her eyes he immediately regretted yelling at her and turned his eyes away once again.

Sarah sighed tiredly and sat down on the bench next to his feet and buried her face in her hands. Chuck refused to look at her, knowing that he would cave and do whatever she wanted because he felt bad for hurting her feelings. He knew she was just trying to help and follow orders, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. She sniffled a little bit as she dropped her hands to stare at him and he couldn't stop his eyes from meeting hers, his face softening at seeing the tears that were starting to streak down her face.

"Sarah, I…"

"I know Chuck." She said softly, bumping his legs gently with her shoulder. "It's just; we have to make sure you're ok. You were left here for three weeks, they…" She didn't finish but Chuck knew what she was saying.

"I know. I'm sorry." He mumbled suddenly self-conscious.

"You have nothing to be sorry about Chuck. None of this, you couldn't do anything. This whole thing is just a fucking mess." She said angrily. Chuck blanched at her swear words, not used to Sarah using such harsh language before a small smile took its place.

"You're only trying to help me." And with one last deep breath Chuck closed his eyes, counted to ten then reopened them.

He began unfurling his body, hearing pops and creaks as his joints protested at being in the same position for long until he finally stood up to his full height in front of Sarah, holding his own hands out to her to take this time. Sarah stared up at him a moment a sad smile on her face as she took them and was pulled up to her feet. She brought her hands up to the side of his face lovingly, her finger twirling a loose strand of his hair.

"I have to know you're ok. At least physically." She whispered to him standing closer. Chuck nodded his head, he understood.

"And what about the rest? Emotionally, mentally?" He asked her as he got lost in the blue swirls of her eyes. Unblinkingly Sarah stood on her toes and placed a soft chaste kiss on his mouth, causing him to feel a shudder down his spine.

"We'll deal with that too Chuck." She said, her warm breath against his lips felt wonderful to him and he suppressed another shudder as she stepped back. "But let's take care of this now. Get it out of the way. You'll feel better and it's the first step to healing." She told him firmly, seemingly to believe her own words. Chuck wasn't so sure but he was willing to give it a shot. He would do anything for Sarah.

With that he let her lead her him back out into the California sun.

This was humiliating. The whole thing. And Chuck couldn't decide if it was worse with Sarah there or not. He had grimly bit his tongue and allowed her to drive him to the hospital, luckily not the one that Ellie and Devon worked at and sat dutifully in the waiting room chair while Sarah went to check him in. She had told him along the way that they had a CIA doctor at this hospital and that he was to see him. He wasn't sure how he felt exactly about that, letting a CIA doctor get so close and personal with him, however it was better than his sister finding out he was in the hospital for assault he supposed.

They didn't have to wait long as a nurse came out and led them down to an empty exam room where she asked Chuck to remove his clothing and to put on a gown. Chuck had eyed it warily, noticing right off how short it was before putting it on. He stared at Sarah for a moment after the nurse left and she stared right back.

He felt slightly irrational that he wanted to her to turn around and not watch as he changed, after all she had seen all of him, on several occasions but right now he felt more self-conscious than he'd ever in his life.

"Do you want me to leave for a moment?" She asked him, crossing her arms over her chest again, a stance she'd been using since they got back to Burbank. His mind screamed at him to say yes but he didn't want her to leave. Didn't want to be alone with yet another unknown government personal so he shook his head.

Slowly he began to peel off his clothes, feeling aches from soreness and sharp pains from the welts and bruises. His body felt fatigued from the lack of sustenance since this all began and lifting his shirt seemed like way more effort than it should have been.

Once it was off he had sat there, shoulders hunched as he shivered in the cold breeze of the air conditioned room. A slight hitch in Sarah's direction brought her back to his attention and he felt a child as he watched her eye his topless form. He felt a blush rise up his chest and neck as he turned away from her gaze ashamed and mumbled a request that she turn around. He was grateful she complied without protest.

The exam itself was more humiliating than having Sarah stare at his broken body. The doctor was strangely more thorough than what chuck felt was strictly necessary but Sarah had assured him that it was standard procedure. He had looked at her alarmed for a moment, wondering if she knew that from training or personal knowledge but when the doctor stuck him with a needle, drawing out what he considered too much of his blood, the thought had fled him as he passed out on the table.

The whole thing had taken just over an hour and now Chuck sat on the exam table back in his clothing as Sarah sat next to him in a chair. They were waiting for the doctor, he had put a rush order on some of the blood tests but all Chuck wanted to do was…

He wasn't sure. He wanted to go home but he couldn't deal with Ellie at the moment. He had been missing for two days about now and he knew she would be worried about him, especially after seeing him take off with the agent. He hadn't even called her, leaving his phone in Castle when he took off, though he knew Ellie, knew she was probably calling him like crazy, texting him to call her, to come home.

"Where do we go next?" He asked Sarah, his voice strangely loud in the small exam room. He felt Sarah tense next to him, startled at the sudden sound before looking up to him.

"Uh, I can take you home. Let you get some rest." She answered as Chuck swallowed hard. He shook his head, looking at the door, willing it to open with the doctor to tell them they could leave.

"I really don't want to go home yet Sarah." He told her plainly.

"Where do you want to go then Chuck?" She asked.

Chuck opened his mouth, about to answer, or not answer as was the case since he didn't know where he wanted to go when there was a soft knock on the door before it opened admitting the doctor. Chuck immediately clamped his mouth shut, not wanting to say anything in front of the doctor. Though he didn't flash on him Chuck had become wary of anyone who works for the government and thought he allowed the good doctor to poke and prod his body, it didn't mean he trusted him.

The Doctor looked down at the clipboard in his hands before looking over at Sarah than Chuck. "Well Mr. Carmichael, everything looks fine so far. You have a great deal of sores, and bruises but none of them look deep and they are not infected."

"That's good, very good." Sarah said reaching up quickly to grab his hand that lay limp on his lap. Chuck fought the urge to grab it back and hold it close to him, suddenly not wanting to be touched.

"The STD panel we took also came back negative, however as you're aware it could take some time for anything to show up if it does. I'm going to put you on some antibiotics just in case to try and kill anything that may try sneaking up on you." The doctor said.

Chuck swallowed hard, and stared at a spot on the wall behind the doctor's head as he tried to listen, but his ears had a loud buzzing sound in them and he found it hard to focus on the doctor's words. He felt slightly disoriented as he focused solely on that one spot, nodding his head a few times automatically as if he was listening but he wasn't.

He felt Sarah's fingers squeeze his a couple of times and he resisted the urge to shudder, suddenly not wanting to be touched, not wanting to be around anyone. His mind brought up an image of the dark spot in which he sat at the Orange Orange alone while he waited for Sarah to come get him and everything in his being wished so desperately that he could be back there, blending into the environment, invisible from all.

"Chuck." She said gently, tugging his fingers and he shook his head slightly then looked down at her. Her blue eyes were wide with concern and he had to look away from them.

"Uh, yes." HE said mechanically, not even knowing what he was answering to.

The doctor gave a gruff puff before putting the board under his arm and looked sternly at Chuck. "I said I recommend you come back in every six month for the next year for new tests to be sure. Also unprotected-"

"I understand Doctor, thank you." Chuck interrupted impatiently, closing his eyes against the buzzing in his ears. He was done with this. He was done being patient. He wanted to leave and he wanted to do it now.

Without waiting any longer Chuck let go of Sarah's hand, wiping the clamminess caused by him freaking out on the leg of his pants as he stood up from the table. "Thank you doctor." He said and he walked around him.

"Chuck?" He heard Sarah call his name but he didn't stop. He had to get out of the room, he had to get out of the hospital, he had to leave.

Chuck opened the door of the exam room and quickly exited and walked down the hall that they had come from. He kept his head down as he his long legs took him further away from the room, from Sarah. He stopped at the elevator, looking up for the first time, his heart beating rapidly in his chest as the others waiting for it turned to look at the new arrival, but Chuck panicked at their eyes, looking at him, seeing him, eying him warily as they took in his over lanky body and his battered face.

"Chuck, wait, please." Sarah's voice shouted down the hall. He didn't turn to look at her, hearing her feet clap on the floor as she ran towards him but he didn't wait, couldn't wait for her.

Turning quickly he headed to the opposite side of the elevators where the door to the stairs were and quickly left through there. Not pausing he took the stairs several at a time heading down to the bottom floor until he was able to get out of the stairwell and out in the common areas. The smell of the hospital was overwhelming as he tried desperately to find the exit. He kept running into people in his hurry, hearing cries of indignation as he pushed people aside or barreled through them without an apology or a glance, his mind focused on one thing only; get out.

"Sir, please stop." A man's voice said from behind him. Chuck ignored him and turned quickly down yet another hallway still seeing no way out.

'I should have gone up.' He thought to himself, turning another corner as more footsteps and voices called after him. 'At least I'd be on the roof' He came to an intersection with three other hallways to go down and without stopping chose the one on the left.

"Sir, will you please stop and turn around." Another voice shouted towards him, but he didn't really hear it. The voice appeared to have grazed his hearing like a bust of wind only to dissipate.

'At least you'd be out and free.' He continued in his head, frustration building in his chest making it harder to breath. He felt the panic rise in him as the feeling of being trapped and lost over took him and it took whatever will he had left not to just crumble to the ground and start screaming in misery.

'You could have ended it and jumped.' Chuck stopped mid-step as he was turning a last corner. He stood stiff with wide eyes in fear as air stopped flowing in and out of his lungs. He couldn't inhale, he couldn't think, he couldn't do anything but focus on that last thought, and how much it frightened him how much he wanted it.

Chuck listened closely to the beat of Sarah's heart beneath his ear, eyes closed tight as he held on to her for dear life. He imagined it wasn't very comfortable for her having a long lanky man wrap his limbs around her like an octopus in order to be as close as possible to her. It was something he had started doing at a young age whenever he felt weak and vulnerable he felt the most safe when he was able to almost literally wrap himself around someone he loves and be protected. Though it became slightly more difficult as he grew long.

He was just grateful his current girlfriend had more height than the past ones.

It was dark in the hotel room where Sarah called home. He could hear the traffic below as people went about on their evening plans or going home from work. He felt separated from all of them, alien almost and wondered when or if he would ever be a part of them again. His world had been such a mess for so long there were times he didn't know which way was up.

"What are you thinking about?" Sarah's said, breaking his thoughts before they could darken. He didn't answer her, just pulled her closer. Sarah's breath hitched slight and he felt her chest rise and fall a few times as she tried to get air in her lungs before he reluctantly loosened his grip a bit.

His mind tried to connect the dots as they lay there, trying to figure out how he had gotten to the spot that they were now. Chuck didn't remember much, everything being a haze from the time the doctor opened the door to now.

He saw himself walk down halls before suddenly stopping in the middle of nowhere. He didn't know what floor or wing he was in and at that moment it didn't really matter anyways. The next thing his mind would accept was Sarah had come for him, as she always did. He was surrounded by security and he felt his body panic as they stared him down and circled him, preventing any escape and then she was there, her yellow hair trailing behind her as she ran like an angel to him.

He couldn't remember what she said, couldn't remember any sound but the buzzing that stayed with him and a constant thump in his chest that echoed hollowly throughout his body causing him to cringe. She took his hand, Chuck letting her this time, and had led him out of the hospital, out the exit he had so desperately searched for not moments before. It was so easy for her to find that he let his eyes flutter closed, trusting her explicitly as she lead him to her car and finally to her hotel.

He had been grateful, not able to go home at the moment. He was glad she listened, more than glad really and it had been a relief. He had felt like he'd been screaming and protesting for years over anything and everything and still did whatever anyone else had him do. He felt like his life was so far out of his control at times that it left him in a constant state of depression that he tried so hard to hide from everybody. Apparently doing a good job of it too since nobody ever commented or seemed to notice.

But Sarah was different. For the first time in his life really he felt like he had someone who listened to him and heard him. Thought it was a small token, bringing him here to her hotel instead of taking home to his sister, it meant a great deal to him and he wasn't sure how he could tell her that.

Sometimes the smallest of gestures leave the biggest impressions.

His mind couldn't connect how they had somehow gotten into her bed, gotten into the position they were in right now but he didn't care. He was comfortable, he felt safe for perhaps the first time in weeks. He was exactly where he wanted to be.

And yet his mind raced quickly as the one thought he did remember reverberated around his head over and over again. To go to the roof, to be able to jump. His body and mind had screamed at him at that realization to make the thought true and to follow through on it, but his heart wouldn't let him. He was tired of it all, all the lies, or the torment. Abandonment and high expectations he'll never meet. Everything was just so tiring to him at that second and the fleeting thought felt right.

But lying here now, wrapped around Sarah tightly, listening to her heart beat below him, feeling her chest rise and fall with each breath, he practically purred as she ran her fingers through his hair in a soothing manner. It was a wrong thought, and it scared him, and he didn't want it. He wanted to live and he wanted to be with Sarah.

"I feel like I'm falling apart." He whispered to her. She paused in her ministration for a second before continuing.

"Yeah, I know." She said back to him. "But I'm not going to let you Chuck."

Chuck turned his head, finally opening his eyes so his chin would rest on her chest and he could look up at her through his lashes. She stared down at him with soft eyes and a determined line on her lips. He fought the urge to kiss her grim expression away but he stayed where he was.

"I feel like everything is so exaggerated. The world is so normal and I feel like I'm making a huge deal out of it and its childish."

"It's not Chuck. Not at all." She countered.

"It's tragic but I'm a guy. I should just suck it up." He lamented, turning his head once more and holding her tight again, but Sarah sat up then pulling him with her. He scooted his body into a more comfortable position but still refused to meet her gaze as they sat in the bed facing each other.

"Don't ever say that Chuck." She exclaimed. "You are entitled to your feelings. It doesn't matter if you're a guy. Gender has nothing to do what happened."

"Sarah-"

"Don't. Don't just suck it up, let it out Chuck because if you don't you'll become bitter and jaded. I don't want that for you." She reached out and swiped a stay piece of hair from his forehead and he closed his eyes, enjoying the feel and comfort of the gesture.

"Sarah have you ever…" He couldn't finish the question, not really wanting to hear the answer. He didn't think he could handle knowing that someone had hurt his Sarah in the same way. That she had gone through the fear and anger at being forced and violated. It wouldn't be her fault, he knew that, there was no question but his heart would break and he was afraid of the anger towards the person and what would do to him.

He was thankful at the shake of her head.

"You work for the government enough and you see a lot of unfortunate things. You deal with a lot of unfortunate things." She said downcast. "It made me question many times what I'm doing. What I do, how it affects people."

"Sarah-"

"I've seen how people react and I won't let you Chuck. I don't know how or if we can actually 'fix' this, what happened, but we'll try." Sarah looked up at him then, biting her lip. She scooted closer to him and Chuck watched as she leaned in close to him. "I've felt so numb and so dead for a long time Chuck and you brought me back to life. You gave me this vision of a future that had more in it than death and orders. I'm not willing to let that go, not now not ever."

"I'm not going anywhere Sarah." He assured her, placing a palm on the side of her face. "I'm right here, with you." Sarah swallowed and blinked a few times and Chuck's heart constricted painfully at seeing tears escape the corners. She had cried so much in the past twenty four hours because of him. He never wanted to make her cry.

Closing his eyes Chuck leaned closer to her and placed his lips upon hers, licking them gently to gain entry. She easily allowed him and he held her as close as he could without occupying the same space and time. Electricity poured through his veins and his heart beat wildly deepening the kiss. It felt right, it felt comforting, but he had to stop it. He couldn't take it any further, not yet, he wasn't ready.

Slowly pulling away Chuck ran his fingers through her hair and down her back, placing soft chaste kisses as he sat up once more to look at her. The moisture in her eyes was still there but the tears weren't falling anymore and he felt elated at that, at seeing her smile up at him. He loved that smile, and wanted to see it more from her. He never meant to cause her pain.

He continued staring into her eyes and he leaned forward again and placed his forehead on hers, still running his hands up and down her spine. He felt her shiver at his touch and her breath hitch in pleasure at the simple gesture.

"Where do we go from here?" He whispered to her, finally closing his eyes again for a second before reopening them, seeing she had done the same.

"First we go talk to Ellie." She said. Chuck sat up slightly and looked at her confused.

"What?"

"And then, we go and find the ones responsible for all of this."

A/N: There ya go. Next chapter will be the Ellie Encounter. Not sure when I'll get it up though. Next week is the Belmont Stakes and with American Pharaoh being a triple crown contender I'm going to be VERY VERY busy. Cross your fingers, there hasn't been a winner since 1978, But i really believe this guy has a chance.

Also, if you miss me a lot, i did write a once shot called "Chuck vs The Cupcake you are welcome to read.

As always, twitter has my thoughts. (If you want my FB messege me)

And my thanks to those who read my story, and even more so to those who reviewed.

**sevenrez:** I respect the military and those who serve but I've heard many a story similar to this by my father (who is air force) and how they view things. For the greater good. They have a different mindset.

**MrBi11:** Thank you *bows*

**Wade1978:** Oh you're making blush. I'm glad you liked the chapter. I rewrote it 3 times till I got it enough how I liked it. Hope you enjoy the rest of the story as well!

**phathead01:** I agonized over that for several days on what Chuck's reaction would be to that proclamation. I decided to go this way to stay realistic. I know some wanted a huge declaration of love and mushy but I like realistic stuff and I settled with this. Sorry for the hang. I hate cliffhangers so I try to end it in a way that makes you want to keep reading but dosen't stress ya out.

**wilf2:** Team Bartowski always sticks together!

**phnxgrl:** Glad you liked it. I felt it was needed!

**Nomadic Nerd:** One of my fathers co-workers, a Colonel once told me that leaders had to play it cool and profesional at all times regardless of how they feel. To be honest I really like Beckman, I always had. She has a more difficult role to play than most really know. Her job is to get her underlings to follow orders. Whether she believes it was a complete failure or not is not up to her, as we all take orders from someone. For instance, i'm taking orders from my stomach...as it is growling and I must feed it.

**uplink:** They must be together on this or the team shall fail. *sigh* plus i love team bartowski being well a team.

**Shutupnkissme31:** that is in the next chapter!


	15. Chapter 15

BACK! YAY. Triple crown is OVER. Back to story writing. Thanks to charahkids for being my ever patient Beta. Personal thanks down

Chapter 15

Chucks leg bounced up and down nervously as he sat in the car outside his apartment complex. He stared out the window at the gate that would lead him to the courtyard then his apartment where he knew Ellie was waiting for him, but he couldn't budge. His body refused to cooperate, refused to move except for that slight bunch.

Sarah sat next to him in the driver's seat and he could feel her eyes on him, watching him closely for any negative reaction. He was glad she was there, that he wouldn't have to face his sister alone. He wasn't sure exactly what to say or how to say it, what was permitted to be said, on top of everything that has happened in not only the last three weeks but the past two years he was afraid the emotions would come out and he would spill everything to her.

"Do we have to do this now?" He asked Sarah, not turning away from his view of the gate. He hoped that he would see her exit the apartment in her scrubs having to go to an early morning shift. But as they sat there in the Sarah's Porsche that had been delivered overnight to Sarah's hotel it looked as if there would be no such luck for him.

Sarah reached over placing her hand on the back of the seat circled her thumb pad on the back of his neck comforting, though he didn't really feel comforted at the moment. It just caused his heart rate to increase as he realized that no, he didn't have a choice; they had to do it now.

Chuck had argued with Sarah last night about it when she told him. He didn't know exactly why he had argued his point, why he didn't want to tell Ellie anything but as always he didn't have a choice. Both Sarah and Casey felt and explained to the General that the operation had gotten too big to maintain ignorance for Ellies part. She was a very intelligent intuitive woman who only had Chuck's best interest at heart, and if left in the dark much longer they feared the danger that everyone involved could potentially end up in.

He didn't believe it. Ellie would never put anyone in harm's way, but as he lay curled up to Sarah's side later that night he knew they were right. Especially now with what happened. He wouldn't be able to hide anything from Ellie; she would know instinctively that something had happened to her little brother, that he had been hurt in some way. She wouldn't stop searching till she found out what that was and by then it could be too late and something bad could have happened. .

Chuck didn't want to think about what that could be.

So there he sat, early the next morning in Sarah's car outside his home waiting for the courage or Sarah's prompt to go in and spill his guts and tell his sister that her screw up little brother was not crazy or flakey, going senile or participating in something, well, it was dangerous but not illegal and that he was safe and she didn't have to worry.

"I think it's time to go in." She told him and leaned over placing a kiss on his cheek. Chuck closed his eyes for a moment and counted to ten in his head before nodding his assent and unbuckling his belt.

Standing next to the car for a moment while waiting for Sarah to come around the front before grabbing his hand, they then walked towards the gates that would lead them to his home. His eyes wondered around the place, looking at anything and everything but the door to where he must go, trying to see any difference. He thought the place would somehow have changed like he had and he would see little differences but everything was the same as it had been when he left. Nothing changed except him and with that realization a cold chill drifted through him.

Chuck felt like he didn't belong here anymore.

"Oh my god Chuck!" A voice rang out startling him. He jumped slightly next to Sarah and looked around wildly for a moment before his gaze settled on Ellies form rushing out of their apartment at him. She wrapped her arms around him tightly cutting off air supply as she gushed her relief at seeing him. "Where have you been?" She finally yelled.

"I uh…was" He stumbled but wasn't able to really get anything out. Sarah stepped in front of him effectively breaking off Ellies contact with him and looked up at his sister.

"Ellie, we can explain, but let's go inside." She said voice hard and commanding. Ellie ignored them; taking Chucks face gently into both of her hands as she scrutinized the healing bruises that still marred him.

"What happened Chuck?" She asked alarmed. Chuck felt the nerves in his stomach tighten as his sister went into sister doctor mode. He grabbed her wrists gently and lowered them from his abused face, his eyes not meeting hers but staring at the open door behind her.

"Ellie…I-"

"How about we go inside. Talk about it in there." Sarah said softly, stepping up to him. He felt Ellies eyes on him for another beat or two, gaging his reaction before nodding and lowering her arms from Chuck's face.

Chuck was hesitant, though he didn't know why. This was his home, had been his home for eight years now, since he got kicked out of Stanford. Entering the apartment everything looked the same. The same warm inviting atmosphere that Ellie had created as she moved in still felt the same as it always had; only now he felt distant from it. Now he felt like a guest.

He never really thought of it much, never felt this way about his home before, but he had always known someplace deep down that this place was always Ellie and Awesome's home. They had picked it out together, had decorated it, had moved in together and then he just came to tag along. Everything around the apartment except for his room wasn't his, and though his sister and her finance had always treated him as a roommate, suddenly he felt like nothing more than a guest. A guest that had worn out his welcome. This beautiful home his sister had created, no longer felt like his as well.

Chuck sat gingerly at one end of the couch where Sarah directed him, placing his hands tightly in his lap and legs firmly together as he sat stiffly, uncomfortably on the cushy couch. He ignored Ellies scrutiny as she sat in the chair to the corner of him and Sarah placed herself next to him on the sofa, leaving a few inches between them. He gave her a small smile of understanding as she met his gaze. She was close for him because he needed it but left space because he wanted it, even if it was a few inches. He could easily close that by leaning over.

"What is this about?" Ellie finally asked, breaking the silence. "Where have you been for two days Chuck?"

He still couldn't meet her strong gaze; see the look of concern and what he knew soon enough to be disappointment in her eyes at him. He fidgeted in his small space of a couch, his mind wandering to his own room, wishing he was there, wishing he could hide under the safety of his blankets for all eternity. However that wasn't an option, not right then anyways if Ellie had anything to do with it.

"Chuck?" Sarah's soft voice carried over to him and he looked up from where he was staring at his hands and saw her soft blue eyes. He could hear his voice in his head telling him that they were so pretty, and he agreed. He'd always been attracted to brown hair brown eyes women but then Sarah came along and she became the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. "It's ok." She encouraged.

He swallowed hard and nodded his head understanding. They had stayed up late last night discussing what could and would be said. What he was allowed to tell Ellie. It wasn't as much as he wanted, and yet more then he wished to tell, but he would take whatever the government was willing to give him.

"I've been lying to you." His voice cracked and he looked to the ground. He heard the cushions of the chair crease as Ellie sat back in her chair.

"About what specifically?" She asked after a few beats of silence.

His eyes prickled and he could feel the tears about to come out, but he blinked a few times willing them away. "About everything."

"I don't understand Chuck. Are you in some kind of trouble?" He shook his head no at first, before nodding it yes.

Ellie slipped off the chair she was sitting on and reached out for Chuck, holding his clammy hands that sat stiffly in his lap. She gripped them tightly as she had done many times over their lives and as it always did, it garnered his full attention, raising his eyes to meet her hard and determined yet concerned eyes.

"Chuck?" She prompted again and he lowered his eyes to the ground feeling ashamed of what he was now to tell his sister.

"I-"

"He's an analyst for the CIA." Chuck's head snapped to his right at Sarah's interruption but she wasn't looking at him, she was focused entirely on Ellie.

"He's what?"

"An analyst. A very good one too."

Ellie released his hands and Chuck immediately felt the loss wanting nothing more than to reach out and take them again. She stood up and backed away from him a few steps as she stared at him so intensely, Chuck felt a shudder down his spine.

"An analyst?" Ellie repeated slowly, crossing her arms over her chest. "And what does he analyze exactly?"

"We can't tell you that Ellie. It's classified. But what he does is very important, and we need you to keep this to yourself." Sarah explained.

Chuck watched as Ellie bit her bottom lip, something she had done a lot as a child but still did even now when deep in thought. It worried him, not knowing what was going on in his sister's mind, suddenly understanding what Sarah and Casey had been saying all along, that it would be a bad idea for her to find out. That she wouldn't understand and it would put her in more danger.

But Chuck desperately wanted his sister to know. He didn't want to keep lying to her and hiding things. Of course he was aware that he would still have to keep secrets from her, there was no way the government would allow him to divulge the secrets of the Intersect to her but at least she would understand and know that he was more than what he appeared on the outside. More than just a loser 28 year old stuck working at the Buy More. That he was doing more with his life, making a difference.

"What is your role in this Sarah? Is that even your real name?" Ellie asked finally breaking the silence as she narrowed her view on his girlfriend. Chuck stiffened at Ellie's tone but Sarah's hand reaching out and laying on his arm made him relax slightly.

"Sarah is not my real name Ellie, and I can't tell you that either. I'm an agent with the CIA." Sarah told her. Ellie lowered her arms and sat heavily back in chair she had vacated moments previous.

"CIA? And what? This whole thing with my brother is just a cover?"

"No." Sarah shook her head.

"Than what is it? What are you here for?"

"El, please stop." Chuck begged softly but his sister ignored him, eyes only on Sarah.

"Well?"

"I'm here to be his handler. To protect him. It's my job to make sure he's ok and that he stays that way." She admitted to his sister. .

The words hurt him, stung his heart. He knew they weren't entirely truthful, it was just a tiny bit of what she was to him, but hearing it put so plainly always brought back the doubt he had playing in the back of his head that it wasn't real, it was all fake and Sarah was just doing her job.

"I see." Ellie said simply, but Chuck knew she didn't see. She didn't understand and he opened his mouth a few times to explain it but no words would come out.

"Ellie, it's more complicated than that." Sarah said. Chuck felt her eyes on him and he turned to look at her, seeing a soft smile on the corner of her lips.

"You know, you two have used that word for two years now to explain everything and I am so tired of it. Uncomplicate it for me then because all I see is that my little brother is being used by the government."

"Ellie I'm not-"

"Yes you are Chuck." She exclaimed. "I may not have the whole picture, or even half but from what I know now puts a lot of stuff in perspective and makes sense. You are being used." Chuck shook his head vehemently.

"I'm not, I'm helping people. A lot of people. I'm doing the most amazing things."

"But at what price Chuck?" Ellie asked him and Chuck's jaw snapped shut. "What price are you paying?"

"Ellie I-"

"No, Chuck. Listen to me." Once again she slipped onto the floor in front of her brother, grabbing his hands tightly and keeping his focus on her. He tried to turn his head to look at Sarah, to get a cue from her but Ellie wouldn't allow it. She demanded all his attention be on her right then.

"Listen to me. You spent the past two years in a fake relationship, lying to me, your sister, the woman who raised you, your only family member and to your friends. You have no idea how many times I've talked to Morgan over the past two years about you, we're worried and concerned and nothing we said or did helped you in any way."

"Ellie, stop." He begged. He could feel his tentative grasp on this slipping and his heart pounded in panic.

"You're going to listen to me Chuck. Because I love you and I care. This, this makes so much more sense. You're behavior and lies."

"I can't, Ellie, please." He begged and tried to pull his hands from her tight grasp but she held on tightly, not letting go.

"And Sarah, it explains how you always seemed so miserable and happy at the same time. They are playing with your emotions. Using them to control you. You must see that Chuck. Please. You deserve a real relationship Chuck don't you see that?"

He was slipping, he could feel it. The edge of his vision were becoming black again and the flight part of his fight response was about to kick in. He felt weak wanting to give into it but he didn't have a choice. Everything Ellie said was true but there was more to the story than what she could see. She only had the beginning, she didn't have all the information, didn't see everything that went on.

"That's enough Ellie." Sarah said and he felt her warm touch on him as she tried to pry his sister's fingers away from his.

"You stay out of this." Ellie growled angrily, the tone scaring Chuck. He hadn't heard her sound that way since he came home from Stanford and was pissed off about Bryce. "You've done enough."

"There's more you need to know Ellie." She persisted, and through his panic he couldn't help the corners of his mouth twitching up at Sarah's bravery. Nobody stood up to angry Ellie, not even Devon.

"I know enough." Ellie growled again, holding his hands so tightly he was afraid she may break his fingers. But Sarah wouldn't give up as she reached ahold of Ellies wrist tightly and leaned slightly over him.

"You do not and you're hurting Chuck. I suggest you let go and listen." She said calmly but it sent another shiver down his spine as fear arouse with his panic as Sarah used what Chuck termed her "Agent tone." It sometimes scared him when she did that knowing how deadly she really was.

Ellie released Chuck's hands and stood up moving away from them. She began pacing back and forth in front of them for a few moments before taking a deep breath and turning back to the two.

"I'm sorry. It's just, a lot to take in. And I don't like people using my brother."

Chuck glanced up at his sister, still seeing her angry expression before turning to look at Sarah, meeting her determined look with his own. "Can we just go?" He said softly, wanting this to all be over. It was a mistake, he saw it now.

"Not yet Chuck, there's still more to tell." She replied running her fingers through his curls soothing him. Chuck closed his eyes for a moment, leaning in towards her touch and taking a deep calming breath before he turned back to Ellie.

He scooted closer to the edge of the couch, holding his hand out for Ellie to take before motioning that she should sit down again. She did so reluctantly as she warily watched the interaction between Chuck and Sarah and he hopped that maybe she was beginning to see that there was more to Sarah and him than Sarah being his handler.

"Please just listen to us Ellie." He begged her softly. The panic and fear in the pit of his stomach didn't lesson or go away but he fought his way to the top as if he were drowning, forcing himself to stay calm and to do this. His sister had the right to know, she was right, she was his only family member and he didn't want to lie to her anymore.

"I'm trying Chuck, I am. But this is some really scary stuff. I'm worried about you." She admitted. He nodded his understanding. She had always been this way. Always been his protector.

"I know, and it's not going to get any scarier but, I don't want to lie to you anymore." He closed his eyes again, not wanting to see her expression when she finally knew. "There's, things that have happened recently. Things that I can't hide."

"Look at me Chuck." She said waiting till he opened his eyes once again to look at her. The anger that was on her face just moments ago was replaced by fear and concern and he hated that he had put it there. "Talk to me Chuck. What happened?"

"I…" But nothing came out after that. No sounds, no thoughts, no nothing. He could see the words, feel them in the back of his throat but he couldn't force them out, to vocalize what he wanted to say. Turning to Sarah his eyes wide with fear he felt relieved when she understood, his eyes fluttering shut as she leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on his temple.

"Let me explain a bit first Ellie, so you can understand better." Sarah said taking point.

Chuck listened to her as she explained to his sister more about the analysis he did, about what she was there for and about Casey. Ellie listened without interrupting, her expression impassive through the whole thing. He wished he was better at reading people like Sarah and Casey were but he never was able to do that. Hence why people tended to use him so often and he'd let them.

"Ok, so let me just, recap make sure I have everything right." Ellie said, clasping her hands in her lap and staring at the two of them. "You are an analysis on a joint CIA/NSA operation and Sarah and Casey are your handlers and protectors. You go on dangerous missions and have been lying to your friends and family for two years about it. How did you even come to this Chuck?"

"I can't tell you that Ellie." He told her morosely, thinking about Bryce and the email. But a squeeze from Sarah made him smile. At least it brought her to Chuck. It could have been worse. A lot worse if the CIA had gotten their way and he had been recruited from college. He didn't even want to think what would have happened to him becoming one of their test subjects for the Intersect.

"And you, you care about my brother?" She asked turning her attention back to Sarah. Another squeeze of her hand in his caused him to look over at her, meeting her gaze and seeing the love inside of them.

"More than I'm allowed to Ellie." She said softly. They continued gazing at each other for a few more beats before Sarah turned back to Ellie, a serious expression on her face. "From the view of the world we are a perfect couple, but to the CIA it's just a cover. He's just an asset and I'm just his handler."

"And beneath that?" Ellie pushed hard. He felt Sarah stiffen slightly beside him as she prepared for this declaration. It would be the first time really that she'd admit it out loud to someone else other than him. But he turned his head again giving her an encouraging smile that he knew made her heart to flip flops in her chest and she relaxed slightly.

"Beneath that, I love him. More than anything. And I will do anything and everything to keep him safe." She stated firmly.

Chucks heart beat wildly at her words and turned his body slightly to lean over and kiss her. It felt fantastic as he licked her lips to deepen the kiss wrapping his free arm around her, holding her tightly to him.

Before they could get too far however Ellie cleared her throat bringing their attention back to her. His face flushed crimson from making out in front of his sister but his gut still fluttered at the feeling of her lips upon his.

"I'm glad. I really am." Ellie stated to Sarah. "Chuck is a great guy who deserves to be loved."

"Yeah, he's hard to not love. He has this way of getting under your skin and staying there."

"Ok, so I get it. I understand and I'll try to be less, well, me about the whole thing. But why now Chuck? What's changed that you are now telling me the truth?" Ellie asked curious.

Chuck stiffened at the question, knowing that now was the time to confess. To bring to light the reason she had to know what had been going on so that maybe she'd be able to help him. He had relied on his sister for so long, and though he tried to not need her as much, let her stop being the grown up, the parent to him and just live her life he knew there was no way he would get over what happened by himself.

"Something happened." He said quietly, not meeting her eyes, though he knew they would be wide with concern as they always were.

"What is it Chuck?" She pressed.

He looked out the window, seeing the fountain flowing on the other side. He could barely believe that it's only been less than three days since it happened. He remembered seeing Ellies expression as the agent grabbed his arm and tugged him after her.

"I didn't cheat." He said dolefully, watching as a neighbor walked by the fountain of their way out the gates.

He felt Ellies eyes on him as she tried to make sense of what he said. "What?" She finally asked, confused. He looked back at her wishing he hadn't.

"When you saw me with-"He didn't want to say her name. "That person the other day. I wasn't cheating on Sarah." Her brows narrowed as she thought about what he was saying. But he could tell from her expression that she didn't remember and he was actually relieved at that.

"Ellie, I-"

"I wasn't really on the east coast taking care of my father." Sarah interrupted suddenly, startling them both. He turned to watch her but she only had eyes on Ellie. "I was on a mission with Casey and we had to leave Chuck in the care of two other agents. We didn't have any choice, Casey and I, and definitely not Chuck. It was a bad decision, a bad situation."

"Oh my god." Ellie muttered eyes wide as things started to piece together from the past few weeks. "What happened? What did they do?"

Sarah looked at him but he just stared at the floor not wanting to see the impact of what happened on Ellies face. When she realizes her brother was weak and allowed a little girl to violate him. His heart knew he wouldn't be able to take the disdain that would drip through her words as she realized how screwed up her little brother really was.

Goosebumps spread over his skin as Sarah massaged the back of his neck, running her fingers up and through the sparse hair at the base of his head as she tried to get his attention. But he wouldn't do it, he wouldn't look at her. He felt cowardly for having her do this for him, for making her tell his sister about the…incident. But Ellie needed to know and if it were up to him he probably wouldn't be able to get the words out this century.

Sarah sighed next to him as if reading his thoughts and placed another kiss on his temple in understanding. He was glad he had Sarah. He was lucky to have Sarah.

"They uh, didn't quite understand how important an asset Chuck is to the CIA and NSA. That was by design to protect him. But in retrospect it seemed more harmful than good." Her voice faded off towards the end as she tugged just a little too hard on his hair for a second. He resisted the flinch that would be natural knowing it wasn't done on purpose and that she was probably berating herself for her part in all this. Chuck made a note that they would have to talk about that later. This wasn't her fault.

"They felt it was a babysitting job didn't they? That it wasn't that important a job. Probably felt slighted?" Ellie filled in catching on. Chuck couldn't stop the smile that crossed his face. His sister got it so quickly; she always was the bright one.

"Yes, but it turned out they were also looking for something. Some intel. They couldn't find it and they were taking it out on Chuck." Sarah explained.

"Oh god Chuck. It all makes sense. Why didn't you tell us? Why didn't you tell me? I don't understand." She said gravely. Chuck still wouldn't look up from the spot on the ground, still focused on it but he could see in his peripheral that Ellie had shifted and could feel Sarah shake her head and knew that Ellie had wanted to comfort him. He was glad Sarah stopped her, he felt as if he would break if Ellie placed her arms around him at that moment.

"There's more." Sarah hesitated momentarily. "I got a call from Chuck the night before last telling me to come home. The female agent, she…forced herself onto Chuck."

"She raped you?" Ellie said anger in her voice. Chuck looked up briefly but seeing her angered expression he immediately looked back down and tried pushing himself further into the couch to disappear, and impossible feat considering his height.

"Ellie, don't- it wasn't his fault." Sarah said defensively.

"Of course it wasn't, don't be ridiculous. Chuck couldn't harm a fly." She scolded Sarah.

Chuck felt Ellie get up from the chair and force her body onto the couch between him and the arm, which there wasn't much room as she wrapped her arms around him tightly and held him. Chuck breath came in short hitches as he tried to contain his emotions but as it always did when with Ellie they over flowed and he released Sarah and held on tightly to his sister.

He felt his emotions go as she held him, rocking him slightly like she did the other night. Except this time she knew what was going on. This time it wasn't her little brother having a random breakdown. The apprehension he felt in the past hour telling her all this especially the last part melted away to relief as he yet again cried his heart out.

He wasn't sure how long they had stayed like that. It felt like eternity to him and he was fine by that, but he knew he had to stop soon. He had to put himself back together. The worse was over for now. The deed was done, he had told the two people he loved the most what had happened and instead of shunning him away like he feared they embraced him and understood, and suddenly the deed that caused it didn't feel like such a big deal to him anymore. It was horrible and he'd never forget, never be able to not feel her hands on him or the betrayal he feels he's done towards Sarah. But at least he was beginning to feel like he could heal.

"Listen to me Chuck." Ellie finally said as his tears subsided and his breathing calmed. He heard plates in the kitchen figuring that Sarah must have gotten up to give them some privacy. "You listen to me good ok? What happened isn't your fault. You couldn't have done anything to stop it."

"But I could have." He argued softly burring his face in the crook of her neck more as he held on tighter.

"No, you couldn't have. Because you are a good person. And she wasn't." Ellie disputed. But Chuck pulled back to look her in the eyes and felt his heart ache at seeing her mascara all streaked down her face from her own tears.

"Regardless I should have fought more, fought harder. This didn't need to happen." He pointed out, but Ellie just shook her head.

"I don't know anything about her but if she's an Agent Chuck no matter her size or gender you wouldn't have been able to take her. She's trained for violence and you are a very sweet person."

"You're saying I'm weak." He said looking away from her, but she immediately grabbed his chin back to her attention.

"No, you're not weak Chuck. Never ever think kindness is a weakness. Sometimes it takes more strength to be the bigger person and kind to your enemies then it would be to hurt them. You have to think about what you would have been able to live with. I raised you Chuck. I know you. You would rather forgive an enemy who hurt you and be their friend than to harm them." Ellie let go of his chin then and ran her fingers down the side of his face, wiping away the streaks of tears. "Even if you could have done more Chuck, I know you. You would feel horrible and beat yourself up worse for harming her. Thinking you should have pulled back some. That she's a girl."

"I'm doomed either way it seems." He commented despondent. Ellie let out a light chuckle.

"Yeah, but I love you anyways. Never forget that Chuck." She told him as she brushed some of his hair from his eyes.

"I love you too Ellie." He told her bringing her to him again in another tight hug.

"Though if I ever see that bitch again, Hippocratic oath or not I will kill her."

**A/N: Well, not tons of reviews but meh. I'm glad for those of you did. Triple crown is over so things are mostly back to normal. (thank god) Yeah...thats about all i have to say about that. Story shall be moving along now. Next chapter, be ready.**

**sevenrez:** totally hope I didn't disappoint.

**zanex9:** I agree, Its coming up next.

**phnxgrl:** thank you. Had to show some of it at least.

wassupchuck: thank you

**wilf21**: Vengence is coming. Time to get the story moving

**phathead01:** Well you know me, I love exploring the dark dank depressing corners of a persons mind. Hope this chapter satisfied your view on Ellie finding out. I rewrote it like 4 times. Someday I should release "the rejected chapters" haha

**Wade1978:** Hope Ellies reaction was to your liking.


	16. Chapter 16

**Wait..whats this? two chapters this week? Yesum! Thank you Charahkids for reading it so quickly! Just a bit of fluff for transition. Hope you enjoy it. Personal thanks at the bottom.**

Chapter 16.

The cool morning air felt good against her skin as Sarah stepped outside Chuck's apartment door and began stretching. The sun crept over the horizon slowly waking everything it touches and it energized Sarah as she walked out the gate of the complex and onto the sidewalk outside.

She begun at a slow pace jogging south heading for the park that was two miles away from Casa Bartowski that she enjoyed jogging on. It was peaceful and quiet in the morning and it was the only time she really gave her mind a chance to think about everything that's happened.

It had been just over a month since the 'incident' as Chuck called it, refusing to call it what it really was. It bothered her greatly that he did that but it wasn't her place to judge or correct him. It was his. She preferred to think about is as "the day a slutty traitor decided she wanted to die by raping my boyfriend" incident, but even she had to agree it was too long.

The therapist that Ellie had found for Chuck told her to not push the subject, to let him deal with names and titles of his own. She had explained to Sarah that it was his way of controlling it, of dealing with it and Sarah respected that. She respected him, which is why she braced herself twice a week for an hour session with the woman.

At first she didn't want to go, telling Chuck that it was probably something that he needed to do and she didn't want to be a hindrance to the healing process. Plus she was never comfortable opening up to people, especially people in the mental health field. However after the first session she was convinced by both the doctor and by Ellie that it would help Chuck more if she were there with him. He wanted her there, and she loved him. She would do anything for him including sit through these appointments that felt more like practice in being tortured.

Entering the park she picked up her speed, feeling her lungs burn as they tried to get enough air to fuel her body. The trails were blissfully empty this morning allowing her to concentrate on her stride and less on those around her. People were too friendly for her liking around there, always nodding hello or trying to get out of someone's way and ending up doing some ridiculous dance that ends in awkward laughter.

She prefers mornings like this where nobody was around so she could think.

There had been no trace of either agent since they escaped, not that the general was keeping them up to date. She had insisted that the matter was closed on it for the team and have since sent them out on multiple missions, most of them simple recon, surveillance, or snatch and grabs, but none at all having to do with Fulcrum. Not that it stopped Sarah or Casey from investigating using their own sources.

A smile crept upon Sarah's face thinking of her partner John Casey. If the situation was horrible for Chuck, and bad for her, she couldn't imagine exactly what was going through her partners mind. He was a man who didn't believe in sharing feelings and even less words but she knew that he was affected by the situation as well, mostly by the shiny new gun he had gotten. He was obsessed with that thing she realized.

It had arrived special delivery two days after Chuck and Sarah told Ellie about his role for the government and Sarah had watched curiously as he slowly unwrapped the package, practically drooling as he did so and took it out of the box.

"Wow, that's pretty shiny there Casey." She teased as he ran his fingers over the barrel like a lover before picking up the mag from the box.

"Ah, that she is Walker." He stated, snapping the mag into the gun and clicking a bullet into the chamber. "I love that sound."

He hadn't used the gun yet aside from target shooting though he carried it around with him everywhere he went. Though he never said it she knew that he took great offense to what had happened to Chuck. Chuck was his asset, his responsibility even though he was stationed elsewhere. She was sure that Casey felt like he failed Chuck by not doing more with watching surveillance, though she doubted he would have seen anything. Between the Agents training for avoiding cameras and Chuck obsession with keeping her out of the know, nothing would have been seen.

Coming up around a bend Sarah slowed down as the large pond in the center of the park came up. She jogged at a slower pace, enjoying the scenery and the slight breeze that came up from it. This was her favorite part of the park and she had spent much time there recently just staring into the water and letting her mind wander over things.

Like how she hadn't left Chuck's side really since that night at Ellies. As the siblings held each other, crying and comforting each other, she had made a light dinner for them and then escaped quietly through the Morgan door to head over to Casey's. She gave the two siblings privacy to talk about what ever, to comfort each other, reacquaint with each other. She couldn't bring herself to give them complete privacy though and sat at Casey's computer and watched the security cameras, not able and not willing to let Chuck out of her sight just yet, but she did disable the audio.

Sarah had climbed back in through the Morgan door hours later once Ellie had drifted off to bed and Chuck had gone to his bedroom. He sat with his back against the headboard of his bed with his knees drawn up to his chin as he watched her. They had stared at each other for several minutes before Chuck finally gave a small smile and tilted his head to the bed next to him.

She had grabbed a shirt and a pair of boxers from his drawer changing in the bathroom and brushing her teeth before she crawled into bed next to him and held him tight falling asleep almost right away.

They had done that every night since then, always sleeping either at his apartment or at her hotel, but either way she refused to sleep without him beside her where she can watch him and make sure he was safe. They car pooled to work every day with Casey, they had lunch together every day at the Orange Orange, and came home together every night. She was sure she'd go crazy by now but she wasn't, it was comforting and she absolutely loved it.

There was just one problem.

Coming to the end of the path by the pond Sarah began to speed up again, doubling back towards the exit of the park. She needed to be home, or back to Chuck's place to get ready for work within half an hour and she obviously needed to clean up.

It only took her ten minutes to get home, sprinting the last mile and entering the apartment. She smiled at Ellie who was making herself a cup of coffee before heading down the hall to the closed bathroom door. She hesitated for a moment debating on if it was Devon or not but then remembering he had an early shift and wasn't in the bathroom she opened the door and entered.

"Hey, save me some water!" Sarah shouted over the running water from the shower as she begun stripping her clothes off her sweaty body. She heard a loud thud, smiling to herself as she saw Chuck wipe the steam from the glass door and look out seeing Sarah.

Sarah grinned as she sauntered towards the shower door only to be startled when it burst opened narrowly hitting her and Chuck exited as quickly as possible grabbing the towel on the rack next to it.

"Sorry, Sarah." He mumbled covering himself up quickly and grabbing his discarded clothes as he hastily exited the bathroom as well.

Not a word was said by Sarah during the entire act, expecting it, though she had hoped he would have loosened up by now. With a decidedly depressed huff Sarah entered the shower stall and turned the remaining hot water to cold sputtering for a second as the iciness chilled right through her and turned off the heat that had been coursing through her for a month.

She understood, of course she did. And she was respectful of Chuck and they had come a long way in the past month but she was so tired of being so turned on and not getting that itch scratched. She had a super-hot nerd that she loved and spent almost every waking and sleeping moment with him but they had yet to completely rekindle the passion they had before she had left.

The therapist told her that it was normal and things would return as soon as Chuck was ready and not to push it. Sarah respected that advice, but that didn't mean that she didn't crave more.

"Fucking assignment" Sarah muttered again as she washed her hair. It was hands down the most pointless and aggravating assignment she had ever been and even now, over a month later she was still cursing it. I messed up her life and it hurt her Chuck and she knew deep down that she would never be able to trust Beckman with Chuck's security ever again.

Not able to stand the cold water any longer Sarah shut it off turning the knobs harder than what strictly was necessary before stepping out and wrapping a towel around herself to finish her morning routine. By the time she had finished and gone back to Chuck's room he was nowhere to be found and she sighed further annoyed as she went about getting dressed for the day.

Grabbing her phone from her side of the bed, Sarah exited the bedroom heading towards the kitchen letting her nose direct her to the coffee pot sitting next to Ellie on the counter.

"Morning." Ellie said handing her an empty cup. She was dressed in scrubs looking tired. She didn't hear her come in last night and had no idea if she was coming or going to the hospital next. She couldn't imagine being a doctor. Being a spy already had crazy enough hours.

"Hey, morning." Sarah replied politely. She took her first sip of her coffee, closing her eyes in happiness as the bitterness ran down her throat. She hated the taste but there was just something about it that made her happy and woke her up. "Where's Chuck?"

Ellie gave a slight shrug, walking around to the stools on the other side of the breakfast nook to sit down. "He came running out here a few minutes ago saying something about Casey." She smirked. "Did you strip in the bathroom with him still in there again?"

Sarah blushed slightly at the comment, and cursed herself for not being stealthier about her attempts. She was a spy after all. But then again it's hard to do that when there were two other people around who had a vested interest in Chuck's wellbeing.

"Maybe." She shrugged off. Ellie placed her cup on the table and looked over at Sarah sympathetically, causing Sarah to have to look away, not liking it.

"You have to give it time Sarah. He'll come around." She encouraged reaching out her hand for Sarah's. Sarah took it and felt comforted by the friendly squeeze that Ellie had given her. She really adored Ellie. She really was the best friend that Sarah's never had.

"I know. It's just…"

"Yeah, I know. Don't worry." She encouraged taking another sip of coffee. "Besides the way you two were going at it on the couch last night it'll happen in no time"

"Ellie! Oh my god." Sarah covered her face feeling it go completely red as Ellie laughed at her friend's reaction. Being caught in an intense session of tonsil hockey by your boyfriend's sister was not something she wished to relive again, deciding that maybe it was time later to talk to Chuck about possibly moving out together. "That's your brother!" She spat horrified.

"Yes he is Sarah, yes he is. And I'm worried about him too ok. I'm worried about both of you." Sarah nodded dropping her hands and leaning against the counter.

"I know. And we're fine. Really we are. Aside from this one little bump." Little was an understatement, but she had no desire to discuss it further with her boyfriend's sister even if Ellie was Sarah's best friend.

With one last glance at Ellie Sarah picked up her cup and headed for the door, deciding to go to Casey's and see what was going on. It wasn't unusual for Chuck to run over there nowadays when she wasn't around, and it was easier for him now that Ellie knew about her and Casey's roles in Chuck's life, but still.

Before she opened the door however Ellie called out to her and she stopped with her hand on the knob and turned back.

"Sarah, I know you can't tell me anything but, have you been able to find the people who did this?" Ellie asked her.

Ellie was right, she couldn't tell her anything, it was classified even to Sarah. The general had refused to give them any information pertaining to the missing agents but both Sarah and Casey at least knew that they weren't in custody.

Sarah shook her head sadly, wishing she could tell Ellie more. Ellie was a sweet person, much like Chuck if not a bit more headstrong and forceful. She was a non-violent person but she had no doubt in her mind that if she came across Coleman she would give the woman what Ellie felt she deserved.

"We're not on that case Ellie. Our standing orders are to go on as if it never happened."

"That's ridiculous." Ellie huffed incredulous. "How could she do that? A member of your team was taken advantage of and abused. Shouldn't it be your top priority?"

"It is a priority Ellie; it's just, not for us. It's not our case. They have people going after them I promise Ellie. But we were told to stand down on this matter and we have to follow orders." With that Sarah turned her back to Ellie, not wanting to have to lie or say something that could potentially get back to the general.

She exited the apartment with her coffee cup in her hand and made her way to Casey's, knocking gently before entering without waiting for reply.

"Don't you two have any respect for privacy." Casey growled from the kitchen.

Sarah raised a brow and looked over at Chuck who sat at the dining room table with a huge grin on his face and a stack of pancakes in front of him. She refrained from commenting on the screens around the living room with video surveillance of everything involving Chuck's life and instead leaned over Chuck placing a kiss on top of his head before sitting in the chair next to him.

"Morning." He said through a mouthful of bacon offering her a piece from his plate to which she declined. It smelled and looked delicious but Chuck had only started to really eat again and she didn't want to take anything away that he would potentially eat. She had a side mission to fatten him up. She loved a fit man, but only to look at. She quite enjoyed that Chuck's slim lanky form more, but he'd been too boney lately.

"Good Morning Chuck. You ran out awfully quick this morning." She commented easily drinking her coffee, giving Casey a thankful smile as he set a plate of food in front of her as well. Chuck blushed slightly and looked down at his plate.

"Yeah sorry. I uh –"

"It's ok Chuck." She told him. Sarah grabbed the butter from the table and begun slathering it all over her pancakes, deciding to add a few extra miles to her jog tomorrow to make up for it. Casey rarely cooked for them but when he did the food was fantastic. It was a hidden skill that Sarah was ecstatic to find out about and took advantage of it ever since.

"In any case Walker, we have a mission tonight." Casey said sitting down with his own plate. She quirked her brow once more at him before looking at Chuck as he nodded his head enthusiastically. Her curiosity peaked at seeing Chuck's enthusiasm she turned her attention to Casey to get the details.

"And what exactly is this mission tonight?" She inquired.

"A biochemist is meeting with some distributor at some Gala tonight." He informed her, seemingly bored already with it. Sarah nodded her understanding, her mind already making a mental list of things needed for the event. "We are to find out who the distributor is and stop them from exchanging anything."

"You should wear something blue." Chuck added between bites of pancakes, gaining an annoyed grunt from Casey and a smirk from Sarah.

"Blue huh? Why's that Chuck?" She asked knowing full well that he adored her in blue.

Chuck shrugged and continued eating, sneaking a hand over to steal a piece of her bacon. She slapped his hand playfully but let him keep the tasty food.

"You two are going to make me sick." Casey growled picking up his plate and going to eat in the kitchen. Sarah laughed at his indignation and continued eating.

"So we're going as Mr. and Mrs. Carmichael?" She asked, knowing full well they were.

"Yep. I'm a successful computer programmer as always and you're my gorgeous trophy wife. Though I'm thinking we should come up with something else for you some time." He pointed out.

"Oh? And why is that? Am I starting to get too old to be a trophy wife?" She asked him. Chuck shook his head and placed his fork on the plate before reaching out for her hand that was resting on the table.

"Of course not. But you are more incredible than a plain ol' trophy wife. Other people should see that too. Even if it is just a cover." He said. Sarah's heart skipped a few beats at his words, loving how Chuck always seemed to know exactly what to say.

Sarah smiled brightly at him and leaned forward placing a kiss on the corner of his mouth. It was just another perspective that Chuck had changed for her. Growing up with a con artist father she had learned early on not to trust words. Words were things you used to get people to do what you wanted, to get them to agree to you. They were full of lies and false hopes and nothing that came out could be remotely true.

That lesson extended further out as she joined the CIA, learning not to trust the people she was going after, that they were liars and cheats and would kill you in a heartbeat. Even other agents and her higher ups words were not meant to be true and honest. They would tell you one thing and mean another. Offer you a life of excitement and doing good for their country only to be disposable and placed in frequently increasing dangerous situations.

But Chuck was different. Whatever came out of his mouth she believed. Something about the delivery of his words, the sincerity of his eyes, she believed every word that he has ever said. Even if they were wrong or a lie, the honesty in which he delivered them made them mean something.

She had never met anyone like Chuck before in her life.

They finished breakfast and offered to wash the dishes only to be almost literally kicked out of the kitchen by Casey, grumbling that they probably wouldn't do it how he prefers them to be cleaned.

With nothing else to do for the rest of the day until the mission Sarah suggested that they head over to her hotel as that was where Chuck kept most of his nice mission clothes and hang out there for the remainder of the day.

Sarah applied the last bit of her makeup and stood up straight staring at her reflection in the bathroom mirror of her hotel room. Straightening her dress and running her hands down the front over her stomach to smooth out any wrinkles she gave a slight nod of her head in acceptance, liking what she was seeing and secretly hoping it would drive Chuck wild.

She took an extra second for herself, counting to ten in her mind before opening the door and walking out into the main bedroom. Chuck sat on the edge of the bed dressed in his tux sans jacket tying his shoe. He stopped mid pull to look up at her, mouth going agape as he stared.

Sarah could feel her neck getting slightly warm as she blushed at his look and hoped it didn't show too much as the dress she wore was slightly revealing. She had picked a dark blue simple dress that plunged down far enough to accent her assets but not overly expose them. The dress flowed down showing her curves perfectly as the skit flowed out ending a few inches above her knees, showing off her long legs in a reputable manner. She knew she had more revealing outfits to wear but she knew Chuck and knew his tastes and that he respected her body. She had taken his words earlier to heart that she could be so much more than a trophy wife and so she picked this dress out carefully.

"You like?" She asked shyly, doing a slow turn, her skirt twirling out slightly from her body before setting again as she stopped. Chuck dropped his leg back to the floor after finishing with the lace and gave her a huge grin.

"It's beautiful Sarah." He said softly sending bumps all over her body.

Chuck stood up from the bed and walked over to her wrapping his arms around her waist and bringing her to his body. He brushed his nose slightly over the side of her check before bending down slightly and capturing her lips.

Sarah was in heaven.

The feel of his lips against hers sent shivers up and down her spine as she tightened her hold on the hairs at the nape of his neck and held on for dear life, opening her mouth to allow him entrance. She wasn't aware how long they had stayed like that, or when she had stood on her toes to get closer to him though she stood taller in her heels, but much too soon for her liking Chuck was slowing down and starting to pull away. She attempted to stop him by pulling him closer only to have him give a light Chuckle and let go of her.

"As much as I'd love to continue don't we have a mission?" He asked her looking down into her blue eyes.

Sarah nodded dizzily, leaning her forehead against his shoulder and took several shuddering breaths. It took a few moments for her to get her balance on reality back but once she did she pulled back to look up at him, feeling her heart beat faster at his smile.

She loved his smile.

Chuck ran his hands up and down her bare arms a couple of times before stepping away from her much to her dismay and walked over to his side of the bed. That thought made her smile. She now had a side. A specific place where she claimed where she slept and shared the other half with someone she loved. She never had that with anyone before. Even when she was shacking up with Bryce they would just sleep wherever they laid, and while that happened of course from time to time with Chuck depending on what was happening, for the most part, they had their own halves.

She watched him curiously as he reached inside the drawer of the nightstand and pulled out a box and her heart raced curious on what it was. His smile grew impossibly bigger as he turned around and approached her again, stopping a few inches from where she stood.

"I thought you might want to wear something to remind you of me." He said softly as he opened the box.

Inside laying upon a small bed of velvet was a small gold pendant with a single diamond in the middle. It was beautiful in its simplicity and she gasped as she saw it, covering her mouth in awe.

"Oh Chuck, you can't, I-" She didn't know what to say. Chuck just shook and took the pendant out of the box, unhooking the catch that was on the delicate thin gold chain.

"Don't worry. It was my mothers. I wanted to buy you something but Ellie said that this would be perfect to give you."

"Oh Chuck. It's beautiful. I can't wear it on a mission though, what if I lose it?" She asked worried, gathering her hair in a bunch so that Chuck could put the necklace on her. Once the clasp was closed he dropped her hands onto her shoulder and kissed the back of her neck where it laid before turning her around.

"Then I'll find you something else to give you. Think of it as a good luck charm." He said.

Sarah frowned slightly, looking up at him through her lashes. "It's hardly a good luck charm if I lose it while in a gun fight." She pouted, looking down , admiring how well it complimented her as it sat on her.

Chuck tilted her chin back up to him with a finger, looking deep in her eyes and gently placing a few kisses on the corner of her mouth teasingly, pulling away just as she would turn her head to catch his lips.

"If you come back to me alive and in one piece than it would have done its just as well as if it came back with you. It's just an object Sarah. Keep it or not, lose it or not, I don't care. The only thing I care about is that you are alright and that you come back to me, because I don't like who I become when you're not around."

She couldn't take it anymore, his words resonating vibrations in her chest that spread out through her entire body causing her to shake. Wrapping her arms tightly around his neck Sarah jumped slightly, her legs wrapping around his waist causing him to fall backwards at the motion luckily landing on the soft bed behind them. Chuck groaned slightly whether from the landing on the bed or the ministrations from Sarah she didn't know and really didn't care.

She continued on, shuddering further as she felt his hands rub up her long bare legs that rested on the bed as she straddled her, letting a smile cross her face as best it could while continuing making out with him as his fingers wondered under the skirt.

The rest was history.

'2 hours later'

"Wow." Chuck ardently breathed out. Sarah agrees whole heartily but couldn't manage to get word out until her heart stopped racing. "I see why you said we should get ready early."

Sarah shook her head and rolled to left to curl her body around Chuck's, laying her head on his chest and listening to his own wild heart beats and labored breathing. She had no idea this would happen. They actually had pre mission things to do which why they were ready ahead of time. She only hoped that Casey would have figured out what must have happened and taken care of it.

She didn't want to move. She was comfortable where she was and let out an annoyed groan as her phone went off and she reached over to grab it off the nightstand. She scowled as she saw Casey's angered face behind the text telling them to put their clothes back on and stop screwing around and get to castle. Sending a quickly snarky reply back she dropped the phone next to her and looked over to Chuck behind her and gave him a saucy grin.

"Well, looks like we're all gross again and have to get cleaned up for the mission. Casey said be at castle A.S.A.P." She fake sighed as she started getting off the bed. "No time for separate showers now so come on Chuckles." She teased.

Chuck let out a hearty laugh as she dropped the sheet and walked to the bathroom. It was a moment later that he joined her.

"I hate when you leave, but I love to watch you go." He murmured to her kissing her again.

**A/N: Thank you for RR, please continue. Next piece up next week. While you're waiting for it go read ****Shutupnkissme313's Chuck vs Ellie. I'm currently reading it and quite enjoying it. I'm off to work on my pre-vaca sunburn. **

**Tah!**

**zanex9:** Thank you!

**wilf21:** You're right it did seem drawn out. I feel it was a bit too dramatic but *shrugs*

**wassupchuck:** Its next on the agenda, gotta work up to it.

**Nomadic Nerd:** Chuck has a way of charming everyone and breaking their walls eh? You need to totally get them allergies under control yo. Theres too much to see!

**phathead01:**Working on it! :)

**sevenrez:** She seems to comfort him a lot doesn't she. *thinks*

**Guest:** Yeah if you wish for me to take anything you say seriously then 1. use proper grammar at least so I know wtf you're trying to insult me on. and 2. Have the balls to sign a name. Thanks for reviewing though.

**Garnetflint (Guest):** Thanks for the compliment! I'm glad you liked it. And yes, I'm glad too. 38 Years without one is too long.

** Shutupnkissme313:** Little known fact is my elder sister says that sometimes when i walk she hears "The Imperial March" In her head. Darth Vader is the secret love of my life (Explains a lot eh?) So i'll take the compliment with pride!

**charahkids:**Its hard to stand up to Ellie.

**phnxgrl:** Thanks for reviewing. I'm glad you enjoyed it.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: I apologize for the lateness of this chapter. was having some issues or something and we (my wonderful beta charahkids and I) were having trouble getting it betad...so any mistakes left is accidental.**

Chapter 17.

"I don't think it's possible for me to be any more bored than I am right at this second." Chuck whispered into Sarah's ear, placing a soft kiss upon it making her shiver and smile in delight.

"I second that Bartowski." Casey's' annoyed grunt came through their earwigs. Sarah laughed out loud, causing a few people nearby to glance in their direction, but seeing Chuck's nose nuzzled in her neck they turned around away with sly smiles upon their own faces.

They had been at the party for well over an hour mingling, having a few drinks but so far nothing yet. There had been no sign of the biochemist or the supposed buyer that was supposed to be there tonight. It was the same boring rich people who used the guise of doing something good as an excuse to spend more money than the charity is going to raise on outfits and drinks.

Sarah hated these kinds of parties. They were boring and dragged out far too long. More often than not she was thankful that she was on a mission while having to attend if only to have something else to occupy her mind and time while the people around her droned on and on about their riches and schemes, trying to outdo each other for jerk of the year award.

She didn't know what it was, but something about having money and power just brought out the worst in people. She'd never met a person who was rich and had power that genuinely wanted to do good and wasn't involved in some kind of bad dealings on the side.

"I'd say let's call it a night here but Beckman would have our hides if we did. We have to find this scientist and the buyer." Casey said.

Sarah looked across the room towards the bar where Casey was standing cleaning a glass and smiling as a patron walked up to place an order. Of course Casey was right. This was a serious matter. The bioweapon that the scientist was trying to sell could have disastrous ramifications if let out into the public and they didn't want that to stay in the hands of the bad guys if they already had it.

But after an hour in the guests stopped arriving and just milled around making small talk with each other and taking full advantage of the free bar, at least keeping Casey occupied. Chuck and Sarah however stood off to the side after making the rounds several times and kept their eyes on all the entrances and exits hoping that the persons they were waiting for would arrive soon.

"I don't understand. Where did Beckman get her intel?" Chuck asked as he began fidgeting. It was a sign Sarah had picked up long ago that signaled Chuck was at the end of his patience and was beginning to get antsy and bored. The tall specimen whose hand she gripped tightly was not a fellow who liked to be idle for long.

Sarah smiled to herself and turned her head to scope out the room again. It was just another thing she loved about Chuck. It was what everyone loved about Chuck especially the government, but to her it was different than him just being intelligent and being able to hold the Intersect and use it. She was always fascinated and enamored on how quickly his mind would work. How fast it made connections, how fast it picked things up. Her favorite times with Chuck was just lying in bed, lying in his arms as his fingers traced patterns down the sides of her arms and he told her stories. Stories of the past, stories of the present, but what she loved more was the stories of the future. How he somehow weaved this beautiful imaginary world together for the both of them. It always made her feel safe and loved and crave that future.

The down side however to his mind is it always seemed to need to be busy. Any time of inaction was limited to a short span as his mind craved for something to do something to process and think about. She knew his imagination was always running and she understood how hard it was for him sometimes on missions to stay focused on the task at hand and not fly off to wherever he would go.

"I don't know Chuck but if they don't show in another half hour I say we call it quits." She suggested, squeezing his hand. She felt him nod his assent and Casey's grunt of agreement as he served another patron, always playing the bar tender.

As expected nothing happened. Nobody showed, but Sarah wasn't worried. It wasn't quite as unusual as one would think in the spy world for plans to change like this. Anything could have happened. One or both parties could have had a conflicting engagement or some problem to solve. They could have gotten wind of a sting or felt it wasn't as safe as they thought. Either way Sarah was done waiting and was ready to go home and continue what she and Chuck had been doing earlier.

"Let's pack it up Casey." Sarah said into her piece and glanced around the room once more. An affirmative grunt returned to her ear and she held tighter to Chucks hand as she took a step towards the exit. She only got a few feet before Chuck stopped in their tracks causing her to turn back to him with a curious expression.

Chuck smiled down at her and closed the distance between them, placing a soft kiss on her temple. To anyone around them they looked like a normal couple in love and her heart beat at the excitement of the truth in that view. She was in love with Chuck.

"We can't leave just yet." Chuck said softly to her, standing tall. Immediately Sarah calmly looked around the room again, for whatever would have stopped Chuck, but seeing nothing she looked back up at his still smiling face.

"What is it?" She asked him quietly, not wanting those around to hear.

Chuck released her hand and brought it up to the side of her face tucking the tiny strand that escaped her braid behind her ear and away from her cheek. "We can't leave without a dance." He told her.

Sarah quirked her brow and looked up at him curiously. Chuck hated dancing. He was horrible at it which made sense as he never did seem to gain complete control of his lanky form.

"But you don't dance." She pointed out dumbly, feeling a slight flush as Chuck laughed.

"I don't but I know you do. I can suck it up for one dance with you." He told her, taking her hand once more and leading her out to the middle of the dance floor, ignoring the disgusted grunt in her ear from Casey as she wrapped her arms around Chuck's neck.

She felt a tingle run up and down spine as Chuck placed his large hands on her lower back, pressing her body to his. She closed her eyes and placed her check against his shoulder, wishing she had thought to wear the taller shoes that night. It didn't matter anyways as Chuck placed soft kisses in her hair and placed his chin on the top of her head and they swayed slowly to the nameless tune that was playing.

Other couples danced the same way around them, enjoying their partners and the time alone together in a crowd if only for a few moments but Sarah and Chuck like all the others ignored them and just embraced their own little bubble.

"I wish we could do this more often." Chuck whispered, causing Sarah's smile to grown.

"You would hate it. I know you." She said. Chuck ran his hand up and down her back a few times before they settled on her waist again.

"Oh, I don't know. This kind of dancing I think I could handle." He told her. "Just being close to you, holding you. Feeling your warm body next to mine."

Another shiver coursed through her and she turned her head to look up at him, seeing his teasing grin. He knew what he was doing to her with his words and he was enjoying it immensely.

"We don't have to dance for that to happen." She told him. Sarah stood on her toes to get closer to him and pulled his head down to meet hers. The kiss stared off slow and tender as most kisses often did with Chuck but she opened her lips and let him gain entry and he deepened the kiss, pressing her close to himself. Her body flushed as emotions raced through her and she held on tight to him, her fingers twined in the fine hairs at the nape of his neck afraid to let go.

She would have let it go on forever, let whatever happened next happen if it weren't for an annoyed clearing of a throat nearby. Sarah reluctantly separated herself from Chuck, untangling her arms from around him to glare in the direction of the person who interrupted them.

The man in question's eyes widened at the iciness of Sarah's glare and quickly turned away dancing his partner to another area of the dance floor, but the damage was done and the spell had been broken. Giving a tired annoyed sigh Sarah closed her eyes for a moment, counted to ten telling her body to behaveand calm down before looking back up to Chuck with a sheepish grin.

Only to have it fall immediately.

"Chuck? Chuck what is it?" She asked him alarmed. Chucks eyes were wide and staring into the distance, all blood seemed to drain completely out of his face leaving his complexion white as a ghost. Alarmed she shook him a few times to break him out of whatever trance he was in but it didn't work.

When his body begun shaking slightly Sarah reached her hands to either side of his face and forced his view down to her, but what she saw in his eyes shook her to the core. He wasn't just scared he was terrified. She didn't feel him flash, as tightly as she was wrapped around him she would have known. Her mind drew to the only thing that would cause such terror on his face without a flash.

"She's here?" She asked but he didn't reply as he swallowed hard and sweat begun to form on his brow. Sarah placed a gentle kiss on his forehead and ran her hands down the side of his face before dropping them. "Chuck, listen to me." She demanded as he took in a shaky breath. "I want you to go sit at the bar ok? Don't move. No matter what don't move. Don't talk to anyone. I'm going to go after her."

"No!" He croaked, ignoring the looks that came their way from those around them. He held on to her shoulders too tightly but Sarah resisted the urge to grimace at the sting, not wanting to put any more pressure on Chuck. "She's dangerous Sarah. You can't. I won't let you." He told her.

Sarah nodded her head and reached up to grab his hand from her left shoulder, causing him to release his grip on her. She dragged him through the other couples, ignoring the greetings of others as she led him towards the end of the bar in a corner that was currently unoccupied. She glanced around the room, taking notice of everyone and everything in it while she searched for the familiar face of the woman she was going to kill.

She shoved Chuck into the corner on a stool and brought her finger up to the front of his face to stop him from talking, knowing exactly what he would say to her. He looked scared and strangely small but that just fueled her anger even more.

"I have to do this Chuck. And I won't be alone. She is dangerous, but so am I." With that she leaned in and placed a hard kiss on his lips before turning around quickly, leaving him behind. "Casey, we have a situation, meet me on the southern side corridor. She said into her watch.

Exiting the room she immediately headed to where she was to meet Casey, the halls being empty with everyone in the main ballroom. While she waited she pulled the gun that was strapped to her thigh out and checked the mag before slapping it back into place and hid in the shadows ready for a fight.

Casey arrived a moment later from behind her, startling her as she turned quickly and pointed her weapon at him.

"Casey, damn it." She bit out but he just grunted.

"What's the emergency?" She asked her in his low rumbled voice. Looking around the corridor, making sure they were alone Sarah leaned towards Casey.

"Coleman is here." She said simply. Realization dawned on Casey's face as a small crooked smile appeared on his face, scaring her in how deadly it appeared to be. Reaching behind him Sarah watched as he pulled out the gun he had special ordered and repeated what she had just done moments before.

"Well Walker, looks like I'll get to play with my new toy." He said.

With that cheesy line Casey walked passed her and down the hall. She didn't remember seeing her in the main room so she presumed that Coleman had seen Chuck and high tailed it out of there. She just hoped they didn't leave the party. This could be their only chance to get them.

Casey and Sarah checked each room as they passed before heading up the grand staircase that led to the second floor and did the same. So far nothing and Sarah was about to give up and go collect Chuck when a noise in a room down the hall caused her to pause. Looking over at Casey she saw him stop as well, proving that she wasn't just hearing things.

With a slight nod from Casey, Sarah took a few slow steps towards the room in question and peaked around the corner through the crack in the door. It appeared to be an office and Sarah could see Leyan sitting at the desk working on the computer.

"It's them." Sarah said quietly to Casey. She felt a soft tap on her shoulder and she pulled away from the wall allowing Casey to take her place. She stood a few feet away from it and waited for Casey's signal before taking her stance.

Counting down Casey pushed the door opened hard and Sarah ran into the room with her gun pointed at Leyan shouting.

"FREEZE!"

Leyan stood up from the chair and pointed his gun directly as Sarah and begun shooting. Sarah ducked behind a chair and made her way around the room to an open door near him barely avoiding shots as she got to a safer place and returned fire. Bullets glanced the frame around the room she had ducked into the room and made return shots. Looking across the room she saw Casey had entered the room as well and had flipped a large table over using it as a shield.

Sarah took the moment that Casey had given here by drawing the firing onto him instead to take a few deep breaths and get her barring. She looked inside the room that turned out to be an enormous bathroom that she had hidden in and ascertained the situation. Everything seemed calm and how it should be except for the toilet seat that seemed to be up, which put Sarah back on alert.

Standing up straight she slowly reached for the door and closed it quickly, not relaxing at all despite nobody being behind it. Cautiously she walked around the room, heading towards another door on the other side of the room and paused outside of it, putting her hand on the knob and counting to ten.

Before she could get down to one however the door was swung open startling Sarah as it hit her hard and she stagger backwards. The door shut forcefully as a punch came flying at her catching her in the jaw before a leg swept out and took her legs out from underneath her.

Not staggering for long Sarah rolled away a few inches before jumping back up to her feet and faced her attacker, eyes narrowed at seeing the short petite brunette haired agent.

"You…" She said in a growl that would make even Casey proud.

Not hesitating the slightest Sarah charged at her, fist swinging and missing Coleman's face only to knee her in the stomach as Coleman ducked and then tripping her as Sarah swung her other leg around. Coleman grabbed Sarah's leg from the ground raising it tripping her causing Sarah to land on the tiled bathroom floor with a loud painful thump causing Sarah's gun to go scattering across the floor.

Dodging a kick to the side Sarah grabbed one of her knives that was strapped to her thigh and rolled to her feet. The two women stood in that stance, hunched over slightly waiting for the other to make a move for a few beats before Coleman came charging back at Sarah.

Sarah moved to the side grabbed her arm, twisting it around bringing Coleman's body to her and grabbed ahold of her hair, tugging her head back as far as it would go without snapping before pushing it forward several times into the wall next to them.

"This is for Chuck you bitch." She shouted angrily, giving one more smash before releasing Coleman and tossing her on the floor, her head hitting the side of the sink on the way down.

Sarah took a few calming breaths and walked over to where her gun lay forgotten in the corner by the tub. Picking it up she checked the chamber once more making sure the gun was in proper working order still despite the drop before turning back to Coleman who had managed to get up on her feet, swaying dangerously, blood pouring over her face and on to the floor from her opened wounds.

Sarah remained on the opposite side of the room, debating what to do when out of nowhere Coleman threw Sarah's knife that she had dropped right at her. It embedded itself in her side and Sarah let out a painful moan as it slid in. She grabbed her side where the knife was and felt the warm sticky ness of her own blood as it seeped out of her soaking her dress.

Taking a few deep breaths she determined that while painful the knife would was fine and most likely didn't hit anything terribly important and raised her gun, pointing it directly at Coleman's head. Coleman was breathing hard from her own wounds, and taking a couple of steps towards Sarah, ready to fight again, but as she took her third step, Coleman doubled over in pain and collapsed onto the floor.

"Walker!" Casey's voice echoed into the bathroom as he approached the door. He stopped at entrance and looked into the room assessing the situation. Coleman tried to get back up on her knees but a swift kick from Casey in the back and she went sprawling back on the floor again, a crack echoing around the room as her wrist snapped at the impact.

"Just in time Casey." She said, lowering her gun slightly but still pointing it at the woman on the floor. "Leyan?"

"Dead." He growled, walking into the room. "Dirt bag wouldn't stop shooting and come quietly. Had to take him out. Unlike this one apparently."

"No, Casey, she's not leaving alive either." Sarah said angrily, bringing her gun back up and taking a few steps closer to the downed agent.

"She's incapacitated Walker. We have to take her in."

"No."

"She could have valuable information we could use."

"She hurt Chuck Casey!" She shouted, her breaths becoming more labored as more and more blood soaked through the dress and begun pooling down her leg and onto the floor.

"Damn it Walker, I know that!"

A brutal laugh coming from Coleman drew their attention to her as she lay there uselessly in her own blood clutching her broken arm.

"What's so damn funny traitor?" Casey grunted reaching down to grab her behind her neck and force her into a sitting position. The wounded fulcrum agent laughed more and leaned against the wall, eying the two of them in some sort of amusement.

"You two. Bartowski. The whole situation." She said, coughing so hard to pitched forward slightly, blood spilling out of her mouth.

"What you did to Chuck isn't funny." Sarah said as she hobbled closer to Coleman, only to be stopped by Casey.

"Damn it Walker, you're bleeding all over the damn place." Casey said holding on to her. "Don't move." He said to Coleman as he pushed Sarah to the toilet, closing the lid and placed her on it. She bit down a painful moan as the knife moved in her and she leaned against the back to try to take some pressure off.

Casey opened the door that Coleman had been hiding in a grabbed a few of the white towels that were sitting neatly folded on a shelf there and went back to Sarah. She took a few deep breaths as he instructed her to do as he quickly pulled the knife out of her side. Sarah grimaced and shouted slightly in pain, the sound echoing around the room.

Blood pooled out faster but Casey placed the towel on top of the wound telling her to hold it to stop the bleeding. She nodded her head, sweat beading over her body as she glared at the smirk that Coleman had on her face.

Finally standing up, Casey walked back over to Coleman and she stared back up at his tall form without an ounce of fear in her eyes.

"You're going in Coleman. You're under arrest." He told her, but Sarah shook her head no and tried to stand up again, but couldn't. She could really use a doctor right about then but she didn't want to call Chuck up to get one. Not with Coleman still alive and gloating.

"Well, all good deeds must come to an end right? Besides. I got my last parade." She panted out, hand going to her stomach for a moment, groaning in pain.

"What are you talking about?" He asked her, and Coleman smirked again.

"You two and your little asset has been a pain in Fulcrums side for a long time." She said. "We were heroes when we came back once they knew what we had done."

"What you did was hurt a very sweet innocent man." Sarah ground out.

"Innocent? Bartowski is nothing but a worthless tool. His whole existence is a waste of time and space." She spat out. Sarah once again tried to stand up only to wince in pain.

"Keep that covered Walker." He ordered. "And you, I suggest you keep your mouth shut if you want to live."

"Truth hurt Major? With your record you should be out there fighting us. Or more preferably for us."

"I would never betray my country!"

"Instead you're here in Burbank, babysitting a useless lump of human space." She said. "At least he was good for one thing." Coleman quirked her eyebrow at Sarah again.

Not able to take her bad mouthing any more Sarah finally stood up and walked over to Coleman, surprised that she didn't slip and fall from all the blood mixing on the floor covering her now bare feet. She grabbed the woman's hair and kneeled on the floor, ignoring the pain in her knees as she hit the tiles hard and tugged her head back again.

"Not another word about Chuck." She ground out.

"Or what? You'll kill me? You won't. I know it." She taunted. Before anyone could blink Sarah reached for another knife from where it was hidden and stabbed it into Coleman's leg. She let out a horrible scream of pain that ended in a laugh.

"Don't be so sure of yourself Coleman. You hurt Chuck and I'm damn well going to hurt you for it." Sarah growled into her ear.

"Walker that's enough." Casey said pulling her away from the other woman. He kneeled down in front of Coleman, pulling the knife out of her leg and covering it with the other towel he had. Once that was taken care of he pulled out his phone to call in a retrieval team.

"Well Jokes on you Coleman. I may not be able to kill you but you're still going to suffer. You're going to go into a hole so deep you won't ever see the light of day even as a corpse." Sarah sneered at her.

"And what you'll forget me? Not likely. Especially now." Coleman replied.

"Team will be here in 15 minutes." Casey said as he placed his phone back in his pocket.

"What are you talking about bitch?" Sarah inquired alarmed, the knowing smirk on Coleman's face.

"Your sweet little Chuck aside from being an adequate fuck seems to me like he's a noble guy, and he'll want to do the right thing." She said knowingly.

A sinking feeling crawled up in Sarah's gut as she replayed the words in her head and realization dawned on her. The worst had happened. She swallowed hard, trying to mask her emotions from showing but she couldn't do it quickly enough and the grin on the other woman's face showed that she had seen it.

"That's right Agent Walker. 1 month pregnant." She said cheerfully.

Sarah felt like she was going to be sick at the news and held her hand in front of her mouth to prevent herself from doing so.

"No." She said softly.

"Oh yes, and you know who the daddy is." She dug. "They'll send me to prison but this kid; you'll have to tell Bartowski about it. There's no way to hide it. And despite how weak he is he'll take the kid."

"No, no." Sarah repeated her hand dropping.

"And this sweet man you're so desperate for revenge for will never ever forget me, or the special thing we shared."

"Oh god no." Sarah moaned.

"You shut up." Casey shouted at Coleman and went over to walker. He helped her stand but her legs felt like Jelly as he walked her out of the bathroom and into the office.

He pulled out a chair by the desk and plopped Sarah into it, keeping an eye on the bathroom door but Sarah didn't know it. Her mind was blank and she felt she was drowning at the news from Coleman.

"I can't do it." She finally said and she looked up at Casey's questioning grunt. "I can't kill her. I can't kill-"The words 'Chuck's baby' couldn't cross her lips. She couldn't even get the thoughts out.

Dread sunk into her at thought of having to tell Chuck the news. Having to explain it to him. She could imagine the look that will cross his face as the news sunk into his head. He was going to have a baby with the woman who raped him. She knew exactly how he would feel. He would feel horrified, and guilty. He would feel violated again and again every day as the child grew and took over his life, because she knew him. Coleman was right; when he found out he would take the child. He would raise it, and she had no doubt in her mind that he would love the child to the ends of the earth and back because that was the kind of person he was. The child would be innocent like he was, and he would not be able to find it in his heart to detest the child.

But what about them? What will it do to them? Would Chuck always feel guilt over it, feel as if he betrayed her in some way. Would they even have a chance to survive this? Sarah promised they would cross whatever bridge they came to together but with the possibility right in front of her now, the prospect scared her.

"Calm down Walker. We don't even know if she's pregnant. She could just be saying that." Casey stated, but Sarah knew it was a false hope.

"What are we going to do Casey?" She asked distraught.

But Casey didn't answer her with words, only a gunshot aimed behind her. Sarah jumped alarmed at the loud sound so near her and turned around quickly towards the bathroom. There just inside the door lye Mira Coleman in a heap, blood seeping out from a wound to her head, Sarah's dropped gun a few inches away from her left hand.

"Guess we don't have to worry about it too much now." Casey stated, pocketing his gun.

Sarah stared shocked, mouth floundering open and closed a few times before it finally closed a final time and she stared down at the dead woman.

"Oh my god Sarah!" Chuck's voice rang out and she turned her head to see him at the door of the office, still pale and shaky as he ran to her, eyes widening at the blood on her dress.

Sarah's mind snapped back into focus as she tried to cover the huge spot with her tiny hands to no avail to hide it from Chuck knowing how he was about blood, but Chuck ignored it and knelt in front of him, grabbing the towel she had dropped and pressed it to her side.

"Did you call an ambulance Casey?" He asked hurriedly as he pressed a little harder, causing Sarah to wince.

She looked down at him with a frown, only imagining what she must look like all disheveled, barefoot with her dress destroyed and blood all over her, not entirely her own. She couldn't help it as she reached her bloodied right hand out to him and ran her fingers through his messed up tresses. She could tell by the way they stood that he had spent his time running his own hands through them over and over again, a nervous gesture he had.

Chuck looked up at her touch and gave her a wan smile that she returned. She wanted to remember that smile, to keep it in her memory, not knowing if or when she'd see it again after she told him.

"Hey, this yours?" Casey asked standing next to him. They both looked up and saw the simple diamond pendant that Chuck had given her hanging from one of Casey's large finger.

"Hey now, see Sarah. That's what I'm talking about. Good luck charm!" Chuck said happily as he took it from Casey.

For a moment, she let the idle thought of magic and good lucky run in her mind, hoping that it'll last for a little while longer.

A/N: There you go. Its not what I originally had planned but I'm trying to wrap the story up. I think another 4 or 5 chapters should do it. Time is getting harder and harder to come by to write and i'm sure you all are aware of how I feel about unfinished fics so I'm thinking of taking a break after this. Anyways please RR.

**charahkids:** Yeah...i knew you'd like the mushy mush.

**zanex9:** Well she did pop up eh?

**sevenrez:** You are welcome. We all know that Casey secretly likes Chuck, even if he wont admit it, even to himself.

**Shutupnkissme313:** Here here.

** wilf21:** Well, hope this satisfies some of your curiousity.

**phnxgrl:** I'm glad you're enjoying the story!

**phathead01**: I don't think i'll put the therapy in here but I have thought about doing some one shots in the future. I'm glad you're enjoying it. I always love the inner working of peoples psyches. They are so facinating to me.

**MrBi11:** Thank you very much!

**wassupchuck** (: Thank you!


	18. Chapter 18

Thank you all who have reviewed! I appreciate every one of you and its encouraged me to keep going and write. Especially to Charahkids who betas this crap.

Chapter 18

Chuck couldn't keep his leg still as it bounced up and down in front of him in a nervous way. Leaning against the chair in the hospital waiting room, still dressed in the tux from the mission he stared at the overly sanitized floor without blinking ignoring the room around him.

Voices of nurses and other friends and family of patients floated around him but he took no notice as his mind remained blissfully blank. He was waiting for word on Sarah. The wound he was told by the CIA paramedic that had arrived soon after he found her had told him that it looked worse than it was.

Chuck chose to believe that at the time. But if he bothered to look down at his hands and sleeves of his shirt he would see the evidence that perhaps it was more of a problem than what they told him as he was still covered in Sarah's blood.

But instead he chose to not think about it. Sarah had told him that as they wheeled her away to the mysterious back room of the ER.

"Don't think about it Chuck. Just sit there and I'll be out soon." She had told him. So with those last words from her echoing in his mind he had found a chair in the corner, away from the others who waited for care or news on someone, he had leaned back and not thought of anything at all.

"Oh my god, Chuck!" A female's voice startled him from his blissful unawares. He looked up quickly, feeling his neck pop from staying in the same position for long as he looked up to see Ellie rushing towards him still in her scrubs. Her face was a mask of pure concern as she approached him and kneeled down on her heels in front of him.

"Hey Ellie." He said, if only for the lack of anything else to say. His mind couldn't fathom anything else at the moment as it tried to kick start itself back up.

Chuck looked away from Ellie as she scrutinized his appearance, making sure he himself was not injured. He could only imagine what he looked like to her, but still he couldn't get the words to come out to tell her that he was fine. That nothing was wrong with him except that Sarah was in the back with unknown doctors getting fixed up. That she had lost a lot of blood, and that it was on him, literally.

"Are you hurt Chuck?" She asked him, putting on a pair of gloves before pushing the sleeve of his shirt up. He was glad he had taken the jacket off before rushing upstairs to the office after Casey and Sarah. Chuck shook his head. He wasn't hurt, but Ellie probed further to be sure.

Satisfied a few minutes later she stood up straight in front of him and removed her gloves, folding them in on themselves and placing her hands on her hips the way she always did when she was considering what to do with him in occasions like this. Not specifically like this of course where he was in a waiting room at a hospital covered in blood, but any time he did something really stupid and she felt the need to protect him and clean up whatever happened.

"Come on Chuck." She said, reaching her hand out for his and pulled him up. He didn't even blink, trusting his sister explicitly. Casey had told him not to move but this was his sister and this was her hospital.

He followed her silently as she led him down a couple of hallways before stepping up to an elevator that was tucked in the back of some dead end. He had never seen it before and by the looks of it, it was most likely used for hospital staff only to transport patients. They went up a couple of floors and down a few more corridors before Ellie finally stopped in front of a room. Ellie knocked on the door loudly and waited to hear a response before she opened it up revealing an empty locker room.

Chuck stood in the middle of the room as Ellie went to a locker off to the left turning the combo lock and opening it up revealing the contents inside, obviously being Devon's locker. She pulled out an extra pair of scrubs and some body wash, before closing the locker and going over to an another one and grabbing a towel.

"You can use the shower through that door over there." She pointed. "Put these on when you're done and place your other clothes in this bag." Still not able to respond Chuck took the items offered numbly, nodding his head that he understood her instructions. He could tell by the way she stood and the look in her eyes that she wanted nothing more than to reach out and wrap her arms around him and hold him, protect him from whatever was going on, but she restrained herself.

He turned from her then and walked towards the door she had indicated, reaching his hand out to turn the knob.

"I'll be outside when you're finished Chuck." Was the last thing he heard as the door closed behind him.

Stepping into the room Chuck looked down the narrow rows of empty stalls with benches across from them which he presumed was used to set down his dry items. He walked slowly down, passing each stall until he came upon the last one and sat on the bench to begin taking off his clothes.

His body begun to shudder and shake as he took off the once pure white shirt that was now permanently stained red and looked down on his arms and hands that was still covered in blood. It burned his skin and his heart begun to beat harder in his chest causing an ache that was making breathing become more difficult.

Sarah's words echoed in his head again then.

"Don't think about it."

She knew him so well, and it just made him love her even more. Closing his eyes for a moment, counting backwards from ten, he allowed his mind to go blank again as he removed the remainder of his clothing and placed it in the bag Ellie had provided before stepping into the stall.

Cold water beat down on him first as he turned the dial and he shuddered again but didn't shy away from it. It was cold and hit him like a thousand knives but it felt good on his skin reminding him that he was still there and ok. That he wasn't as numb as he thought he was. He stood there just taking it, relishing it until the water finally turned warm, than hot enough to begin showering. Taking the washcloth that Ellie had included with the other towel, Chuck poured a generous amount of Devon's body wash on it and begun scrubbing his body.

Red mixed with the clear water and the white suds from the soap as he washed away all the dirt and grim that covered him. A small smile graced his lips at the feeling of feeling slightly lighter filled him as everything washed away and down into the drain below, mixing with whatever else was below there. He stood there under the spray of the water long after the hot water had run out and enjoyed the blistering cold water a bit longer before finally turning it off and drying off.

He wanted to see Sarah.

True to her word, Ellie was outside the men's locker room door pacing back and forth waiting for him as he came out. Her face lit up slightly with relief at seeing him and he took it to mean that he looked better than he did before. She approached him than, finally wrapping her arms around him and holding him tightly.

"I'm so glad you're ok." She whispered to him. He closed his eyes, realizing that she meant it. He never really thought too much about how much this life that he didn't chose would affect her, but seeing the results of it now, him covered in blood, Sarah being injured must have scared her to death.

"I'm ok Ellie." He breathed into her hair.

The siblings stood like that in the middle of the hall of the hospital, just taking in the relief that both were ok and both had each other. They pulled away a few minutes later with Ellie brushing a few stray wet strands from his forehead.

"You need a haircut Chuck." She told him lightly. Chuck shook his head.

"Sarah likes my hair like this. She likes to run her hands through my hair." He told her, feeling a blush creep up his neck as Ellie gave him a knowing looking. He was sure his sister knew exactly why she loved to do that. "How is she?" He asked.

The smile on Ellies face fell slightly but still remained giving him hope. "She's fine Chuck. The wound was deep but didn't hit anything vital. She was stitched up and given some blood."

"So everything's alright?" He asked her hopefully. Ellie gave a light Chuckle, causing him to frown slightly. He didn't think any part of this situation is funny. Ellie being the more intuitive of the two immediately saw his frown and lightly ran her hand down his arm in comfort.

"I'm sorry Chuck. I didn't mean to laugh. It's just, you two are just so crazy in love." She explained. Chuck couldn't stop the full grin then. Yes he loved her so much. "Let me take you to her."

They returned to the ER and Ellie took him to the back with the patients and ushered him into the room that Sarah was currently resting in. She was hooked up to an IV and several other machines. He felt the blood drain from his face as he looked around the room before his eyes finally settled on Sarah who was lying peacefully on the bed.

She looked different from when he last saw her. She was extremely pale and with her bright yellow hair seemed to blend magically into her surroundings, making the larger than life woman that he loved and who protected him seemed small and lost.

Sarah's eyes opened at the sound of the two entering the closed off room and smiled up at Chuck with a weak smile. Passing Ellie he reached out and gingerly picked up her hand that lie upon the white sheet, gripping it as tightly as he dared as he leaned over the bed and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"I'm ok Chuck." She soothed, but Chuck shook his head, laying the hand down in search of a chair. He pulled the one that sat in the corner up to her bed before taking her hand in his again.

"That's what Ellie said but you look anything but fine." He told her worried. But Sarah bristled at his concern.

"It's just from losing blood Chuck. I'll be right back to normal soon." She promised. Chuck nodded his head.

They sat in silence, time passing them by, neither noticing when Ellie had left them alone in privacy. There was so much to say for both of them but neither wanted to bring up anything. The subject on both of their minds and their tongues was the same, Agent Coleman. Chuck hadn't even blinked at seeing the woman who had hurt him dead on the floor behind Sarah when he arrived in the room, but with Sarah fine it was brought forward in his mind.

He could tell that Sarah was hiding something from him, probably about the attack. He knew the confrontation between the two women would be bad, and he wondered what it was that Coleman had said to upset Sarah so much. Perhaps it was because she was dead that Sarah was upset. That now Coleman wouldn't be brought to justice, wouldn't be persecuted for crimes against their country and against Chuck.

"I'm glad she's dead." Chuck said so softly he wasn't sure Sarah had heard him. But when she looked up from their entwined hands into his eyes he knew that she had. He watched her take a shuttering breath before looking away for a moment.

"You don't mean that Chuck." She told him. But he did. He knew what Sarah thought about him. That he was sweet and kind and would never hurt or hate anyone. But he knew differently. He knew himself. There was a part of him that was black and ugly like everyone else in the world that wished misfortune on people that would hurt him and his friends.

"I do Sarah. But I am glad that you aren't the one who did it." She narrowed her eyes at him, asking him how he knew. "Casey told me."

"Oh god." She gasped and struggled to sit up. She winced in pain causing Chuck to panic as he stood up and gently tried to help her, placing pillow behind her back. Once she was settled again he sat back down, grabbing her hand again and looked at her questioningly. "What else did he say?"

Chuck narrowed his eyes at her wondering where she was going with this. "Nothing else Sarah. Just that she was subdued but still managed to get a weapon and he killed her."

Sarah nodded her head as if confirming the events. The room was quiet as tension permeated around them. Obviously there was more to the story and he could tell by the way she bit her lip and her brow furrowed that Sarah was debating if she should tell him or not. He sat quietly waiting for her to make up her mind. The curiosity was killing him inside but Chuck had no doubt in his mind that whatever decision Sarah's struggle would come to, that she would make it with his best interest at heart.

Finally after what felt like forever Sarah let out a loud sigh and covered her face with both of her hands, hiding from him. He didn't like it, as her shoulders heaved slightly and he knew she was holding back sobs, but she lowered her hands eventually and reached out with both of hers to take his.

"Chuck I'm sorry." She stuttered, breath ragged as she tried to control her emotions. He didn't like seeing her like this. She was supposed to be his strong kick ass ninja girl.

"There's nothing to be sorry about Sarah. She was evil. She had to be taken out. She made her own choices." He said somberly. But Sarah just shook her head.

"I couldn't kill her Chuck. I wanted to. God I did, I wanted to. But I couldn't." She pleaded. Chuck reached out one hand and slid the back of a finger down her cheek, wiping away a tear.

"And I'm glad Sarah. I don't want you to do that for me."

"It wasn't for you." She interrupted him. "Or it was. I don't know." Chuck was lost now, and he knew from Sarah's response that he looked it too. "There's something you have to know Chuck."

"You know you can tell me anything Sarah. I trust you, I love you." He said. With that he got out of the chair and sat on the edge of the bed next to her. Sarah scooted over slightly, hesitantly at first and slowly due to her wound to make more room on the bed for him. Chuck rapped his arm around her shoulders and she laid her head upon his chest, curled up as best she could without causing any more pain.

"I don't know if you will after this Chuck." She whispered. Chuck ran his fingers through her hair, shushing her.

"There is nothing you can do or say that would make me stop loving you Sarah. Nothing will come between us."

"Don't say that Chuck. You don't know. The future could hold anything." She said. "Which is why, as much as I don't want to tell you this, I'm afraid of the ramifications if it comes back in the future."

That puzzled Chuck. He didn't know what to say in response so he said nothing. He stayed where he was, with Sarah in his arms, feeling her still silky tresses and waited for her to continue. It took several minutes but he knew she would tell him in her own time.

"I was going to kill her Chuck. I was going to make her pay for what she did to you." She started. "But I couldn't."

"And how come Sarah?" He asked her.

"She said…" Sarah paused, letting the silence stretch out to the point where everything in Chuck was screaming to know. But he kept his silence. "She told us she was pregnant Chuck. That it was yours."

Chuck's arm dropped from his ministrations as shock coursed through his body. His? His baby? The woman who raped him was pregnant with his child. They had created something together even thought it was forced. Chuck's mind raced from one thought to another, unable to make any real connections as confusion set in and the numbness began to set in.

He felt Sarah sit up as quickly as she could and turn her body towards him and he met her eyes. His own features softened at seeing the distress on her own face. Her eyes were wrought with tears and he could see everything she felt, perhaps for the first time.

"Do we know if it was mine?" His voice croaked. Sarah shook her head and wiped away the moisture on her cheek.

"As far as I know we don't even know if she was really pregnant." She told him. "But I couldn't take the chance. I couldn't kill something that was of you. Even if part of it was her." Chuck nodded, understanding. And he really did understand.

"I don't want to know." He told her, watching her eyes narrow.

"I don't under-"

"I don't want to know if she was pregnant. Or if it was mine." He said.

"Oh Chuck. If she was-"

"It doesn't matter Sarah. Not anymore. She's dead, its dead. She made a bad choice and it got both of them killed." He argued trying to end the conversation. He had a lot to think about, a lot to consider. But he knew this is what he wanted. He didn't feel the need to mourn the loss of something that he didn't even know could possibly be until a few moments ago.

"It does matter Chuck." She said, and Chuck shook his head.

"It would have if it survived. I'm just grateful that you are alive, and that you are fine." With that he leaned in towards her and placed his lips on hers kissing her tenderly before moving slightly to the right to kiss away her tears. He felt Sarah shudder and moved back to her lips only to hear a clearing of a throat.

"This is a hospital room. You off the bed. You, lie down until you're checked out." A stern looking nurse said startling the both of them. Chuck placed one last kiss on her cheek before getting off the bed and standing to the side to allow the nurse to fix Sarah back up on the bed.

Once the nurse left he sat in the chair holding her hand and watching as she dozed off and on.

**A/N: Ok, I'm thinking one more chapter and I'm going to try to get it out by friday. My vaca starts Saturday and I'm not doing crap for 10 days so I don't wanna leave this hanging.**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Last Chapter *sigh* Please give a round of applause to charahkids for reading through my horrid typing and fixing it. I have really bad spelling. I would like to thank each and every one of you who have read this as well as reviewed. Loves you all lots. Enjoy the chapter.**

Chapter 19

"Agent Coleman was then shot and killed just less than ten minutes later having acquired Agent Walkers gun." Casey intoned, standing at attention in front of the bank of screens in the conference room of Castle. "Right after the asset arrived in the room and promptly took over the care of Agent Walker's wound while I began clean up procedures ma'am."

"I see." The miniature woman said, shifting a few papers that lay on her desk in front of her. Sarah watched carefully, not taking her eyes off the General. She couldn't tell if Beckman was angry or not, the woman wouldn't have gotten to where she was now if she were so easy to read, but both Sarah and Casey stayed on alert.

They had both gotten texts the night before telling them to report to Castle as soon as Sarah was discharged from the hospital. It hadn't been an easy ride there. Ellie, the ever paternal mother bear had insisted that Sarah go home, (to her apartment, not Sarah's hotel room) and rest, arguing that she was in no condition to go to work.

It warmed Sarah's heart.

She had never really had anybody to care about her or for her when she was sick or injured. She would always stay in the hospital for the minimal amount of time required before making a hasty escape, usually returning to work a couple days later. She was never one to just rest. There was always a job to do.

Thankfully telling Ellie about her spy life had been a blessing and between her and Chuck had been able to talk Ellie out of forcing her into bed rest and allowing her to leave for a few hours to report, provided Sarah promised to come straight home and get into bed without further complaint.

That had been about two hours ago.

Now she sat in the chair next to Casey. She had been ordered to sit by Beckman as sweat begun to pool down her face and her skin begun to turn red and feel hot. She was regretting not taking Ellies advice and resting but she had to know what was going on, what would happen. She could tell as soon as the General came on the screen that they were in trouble and had screwed up and now she was fearful or what the consequences would be.

"And your prognosis Agent Walker?" Beckman asked, breaking Sarah out of her own thoughts. It took a few seconds for the question to register in her head and she sat up straighter.

"It was a clean cut. Nothing vital hit. Just mostly blood loss." She reported. Casey grunted something next to her she couldn't quiet hear but suspected it was around the lines of 'good thing you sharpen your knives.'

The General nodded and looked up finally to the two Agents, removing her glasses and sitting back against the large chair behind her that dwarfed the little General. She eyed the two of them, letting the silence and tension draw out and Sarah was glad that Chuck wasn't there. Sarah wasn't sure what kind of trouble they were looking at and so his nervous babbling in times of tension could hurt them even more. Instead he went back to his own private room to work on some dailies.

"You two had been told to not pursue Coleman and Leyan. And yet you disobeyed a direct order and did so." Beckman began.

"Ma'am, they were there. We only pursued them because they were in the vicinity." Sarah argued, but Beckman raised her hand to silence her.

"That is not what I'm talking about. Do you take me for a fool? I know you two have been tracking them for the past month since they escaped. You're not the only one with sources."

"If I may General. They had harmed a member of our team. We wanted them brought to justice if only for that." Casey stated firmly.

"I suggest you stop Major." Beckman said sternly, leaning forward, clasping her hands on her desk. "While I can appreciate your loyalty to each other and the team I have to question your dedication to the agency. You violated a direct order. This time was a small infraction, what will the next one be?"

Neither Sarah nor Casey said a word. To say anything right now would be career suicide for them, and could potentially have negative consequences for Chuck as well. A thought Sarah didn't want to think about.

"Luckily for you, this team has the highest success rate of any other team in the history of either the CIA or NSA and the higher ups agreed to allow this indiscretion go. Do not make a habit of it team. You are to obey every order given to you to the letter without question or deviance is that understood?"

"Yes Ma'am"

"Understood General." They both said.

General Beckman eyed them both for a few more moments before letting out another sigh.

"With that in mind, you are both to be commended for the apprehension of both escaped Agents. Though we would have preferred them alive. Their intel would have been invaluable to us."

And very devastating to Chuck, Sarah thought but didn't voice. To say she was sorry about the death of the two Agents who betrayed their country would be a lie. While she had killed many people in her life, all for the greater good and from orders or necessity, she never really considered herself a killer, until she met Chuck anyways. She always tried to bring the people in when she could, realize that intel was more important than dead bodies. But this time, she would have killed them in a heartbeat without any remorse at all.

"General, if I may. What is to happen to their remains?" Sarah asked, hiding the concern from her voice. Sarah asked, hiding the concern from her voice. The General nodded her head, as if understanding Sarah's real concern.

"Based off the blood tests done so far it has been determined that Mira Coleman was in fact 4 weeks pregnant." Sarah's heart sank at that. "However due to the possibility that the father is the asset we decided it would be best to destroy all evidence. As witnessed by myself to be sure all specimens a long with the agent's remains have been destroyed and cremated as of 0500 this morning."

"You didn't do a paternity test?" Casey asked somewhat surprised. Sarah wanted to smack him.

"No DNA was taken from the fetus Major. Tests create results which create paper trails. With the possibility of it being the Intersects its best that it remains a mystery." Beckman intoned.

Sitting up straighter Sarah gave a glare to Casey before turning back to the General. "I have spoken to Chuck about the possibility General and he expressed that he did not want to know. He feels it will be better that way."

"Then the issue is resolved." Beckman stated, effectively ending the topic. She reached out of frame and grabbed a folder, opening it up and shifted through the papers. "Last thing on the agenda is about the asset."

"Should I go retrieve him Ma'am?" Casey inquired, still at attention. Beckman shook her head.

"No Major. His orders have changed, and so have yours. During your absence as you know the Intersect spent the majority of the day here going through reports, which led to the highest two week capture rate in the history of US intelligence."

Sarah's mouth dropped momentarily, her eyes going wide. That had to be an amazing feat. And for Chuck to have been instrumental in it, she couldn't believe it, and she couldn't be more proud.

"With that in mind I've been authorized to refit the Orange Orange to a cover that was more suitable for the Intersect and to hire him on as a top level analysis."

"What?" Casey grunted.

"You heard me Major. You and Chuck are to put in your two weeks' notice in 72 hours to the Buy More. That will give us sufficient time to refit the store above and work out any issues with the cover."

"So hire on, which means the Agency, is going to pay him right? He has to have some kind of income General.

Casey scoffed and folded his arms across his chest. "She's right, unless you plan on buying those crap video games he's so attached to."

"I do not plan on buying him any games Major. Yes Agent Walker he will be given pay of that of an analyst at the highest level."

"Wow, Chuck will be happy to hear that." Sarah said excitedly. Things were beginning to look up for Chuck.

"I'm sure he will be. I'll leave it to you Agent Walker to inform him of the news. If there is nothing else…" She eyed the two of them waiting. Neither said a word and Sarah waited with bated breath for the General to disconnect so she could tell Chuck the great news. "Alright then. Major you are dismissed to inform the asset. Agent Walker, please stay."

Sarah glanced over to Casey seeing him eye her as well, passing off the message silently that neither knew what this would be about. Sarah wracked her brain as Casey left the conference room on what the General would want to talk to her in private about but nothing really came to mind. But she was sure it involved Chuck.

They both waited several moments after Casey left, eyeing each other. Sarah wasn't sure what was going on but the growing pit in her stomach as causing her to feel nauseated and the pain in her side to throb even more. She wanted nothing more than to just go home, take some pain killers and sleep till she's healed next to Chuck.

"Agent Walker, we need to discuss your relationship with Chuck." The General began; dread adding to the pain she was already feeling. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to place a reprimand in your file regarding it. You should have informed me of you being compromised a long time ago, but instead you hid it."

"General I-"

"You don't get to speak right now Agent. The danger you could have put the asset in as well as yourself and Major Casey is unspeakable. You're lucky nothing has seriously happened while you indulged in your relationship."

Beckman was right of course. There were reasons why agents weren't to be compromised with the assets. It could seriously damage their judgement and could get the asset hurt or even worse, killed. She never wanted that for Chuck. She could never hurt Chuck. The right thing to do right now would be to nod and take a reassignment.

But she couldn't do that now. Sarah was too hopelessly in love with Chuck to let him go. So she would do the only thing that was left to do.

"You are right General. With that I'd like to offer up my resignation." She said, standing up slowly, ignoring the pain in her side.

"You're resigning?" The General inquired her brow quirked slightly up. Sarah nodded her head and looked to the side of the Generals head, not able to look her directly in the eyes.

"Yes. I know the rules and I broke them. I'd say I'm sorry but I'm not. I understand why you will need to replace me but I can't take a reassignment. I won't." She declared.

"You won't?"

"No. Because I never thought anyone would truly love me General and he does. And not because I'm pretty or an agent. I can't give that up. I love him too."

The declaration made both women stared at each other for several beats, one scrutinizing the other woman while said other woman dreaded what would be ordered next. However she never expected the General to smile. Even if it was just a tiny barely there one.

"Which is exactly why it's been decided to sanction your relationship." She told Sarah.

Sarah was stunned, mouth dropping again as her heart hammered. She was not expecting that twist. "What?" She asked.

"This is a unique situation Agent Walker. It's not like any we've ever encountered before and as such it's been decided that we need to treat it as such."

"I don't understand ma'am." Sarah stated weakly.

"Since you're relationship started the success rate of the team has surprisingly increased. Even during the time after the Agents were in Castle, though the rate dropped slightly was still high. It's believed it's because of your relationship that the asset is more stable and able to cope with all this. And for that, we are sanctioning your relationship. You and the asset are to move in together for security."

Everything was moving too fast and Sarah felt like she was going to throw up, but she held it in. She had never felt so many emotions in one time and it felt overwhelming to her. From dread to excitement, from fear to elation. Everything was jumbled up inside of her. She was getting everything she wanted but she knew there had to be more than that. There were other reasons assets and handlers weren't to be in relationships.

"I'm honored that the Agency trusts me so much." Sarah said delicately, eyeing the General warily. Beckman scrutinized Sarah for a moment but she didn't back down. She knew the General was aware of what she was saying between what she wasn't.

"Make no mistake Agent Walker." The General said slowly. "The Agency trusts your skills and your attachment to keep the Intersect safe and out of enemy hands. We have no doubt in our minds that you will protect him until your dying breath. But be aware that we don't fully trust you."

Sarah nodded, getting the meaning. "I understand General. Than why sanction it if it's also a risk."

"It's a risk we are willing to take Agent. I suggest you not question it and do not cross us. You will not like the consequences."

With that the General disconnected the stream and left Sarah alone in the silence. She had a lot to think about. A lot of joy and a lot of sadness. She wasn't quite sure what was going on and she needed time to process it. But seeing Chuck peak around the corner at her, seeing if it was safe, she knew that she wouldn't exactly get the time to do it. But then again, she may just have to learn to adjust her process to include Chuck.

'2 hours later'

"Wow." Chuck blew out a large breath of air causing Sarah to shudder slightly as his chest rose and fell heavily beneath her head. "I'd say 'who knew life could change so much so quickly', but I feel I'm probably the poster child for that."

Sarah laughed lightly and gripped his fingers tightly that she was lazily playing with, entwining and releasing, teasing his fingers with her own as they laid on his bed and talked through everything. So much had changed in the past twenty four hours that both their heads were spinning like crazy. But Sarah had to admit that talking it out with Chuck; it felt less confusing than it did before.

"So we are officially allowed to do this now eh? Still kinda weird we need permission but I'll take it."

"You should Chuck. They don't sanction just any relationship. In fact I only know of one couple. Codenames Frost and Orion."

Sarah looked up at Chuck, waiting to see him flash but nothing happened. He just looked back down at her and shrugged his shoulders.

"Guess they're not in here." He commented. Sarah thought that odd.

"They are the most famous asset/handler couple in the CIA. Orion was a brilliant scientist and as such they sent their best agent, Frost to watch over him. Somehow they fell in love and it was sanctioned they could start a relationship. I hear they got married, had kids the whole thing."

Chuck sighed happily and she smiled. "Gives me hope for us then." He said softly. "But I don't understand the part about trusting me with you. How can they trust you but not?"

Sarah sat up then, immediately regretting it as her side burned and she missed the warmth of his body but she had to see him, and to show him through her eyes how serious this was.

"They mean they trust that if anything were to happen that you would always be safe. That the enemy won't get to you. But at the same time, they don't trust me not to take you away from them."

"Sarah…" He said softly.

"It's true Chuck. You know it, I know it. If anything were to threaten you I would take you away without a second glance. But they're willing to risk it because they need you Chuck. You under estimate yourself but its true. You are so valuable. And not just because of the Intersect."

"I feel like a tool."

"Which is why I suspect is the real reason Bryce did what he did Chuck. The Agency is drooling over you and your skills and from what I hear Bryce is getting a beating career wise for keeping you out of their hands so long."

Chuck smiled up at her, reached out and pulled her back down to his chest, kissing her several times on the top of her head.

"Let's not think about that right now Sarah. For now, rest, sleep, and dream of us together. Finally happy, for real."

And she did.

The End

**A/n:2: I could have dragged it out more but meh, why? (i'm going on vacation for 10 days.) So I'm probably going to take the rest of the summer off. Its really busy for work cause of Del Mar &amp; Saratoga so its hard to write. You can all follow me on FB, Tumblr, and twitter. THANK YOU ALL!**


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